Our law student is hotter.
When you think of Oklahoma, what’s the first thing that comes to mind? For some it’s a Broadway musical, for others, it’s agriculture, and for others still, it’s football. But what about beautiful, intelligent women?
Today, we’ve got a story for our readers about a law student with some really big… brains. A tipster notified us about this sexy Sooner and the double life she leads: she’s a second-year law student, but in her free time, she’s a model who’s worked at some of the finest breastaurants in the business.
Who is this lovely law student, and which law school does she attend? More importantly, what does she look like? Semi-NSFW pics, or it didn’t happen….
Continue reading “A Model Law Student: This Sexy Sooner Hits the Books Hard”
Insert face of law school student above.
Instead of hiring a new professor to teach Cross-Cultural Comparison of Masturbatory Prohibitions, I want law schools to start paying six-figure salaries to the people they hire to work in their career services offices. I want U.S. News to include the number of CSO professionals and money spent on CSOs as data points in their law school rankings. I want deans to start asking rich alumni if they would like to donate to help fight mental disability and extreme laziness in career services offices.
Because honestly, the lack of effort put in by career services professionals at the nation’s law schools really seems to be out of hand. Maybe they’ve just been collectively beaten down by the years of terrible job prospects and the throngs of students in need of help. Maybe they believe that there really is nothing they can do, and they are significantly more worried about protecting their own jobs than finding jobs for eager law students. Maybe the lack of institutional support and respect for their efforts makes them feel like second-class citizens whenever the Professor of Impractical Studies That Serve No Clients walks into the room.
I don’t know why we’re here, but when you can’t even trust your CSO to effectively cull Simplicity to remove stupid and insulting job prospects like the ones below, it’s time to change the entire approach to law school career services….
Continue reading “Is Your Career Services Office This Lazy?”
Here at Above the Law, we try to notify our readers about job opportunities for law students and lawyers. Some of these positions are less desirable and some are more desirable, but hey: in this economy, a job is a job.
(At least as long as it pays. Some jobs don’t, of course.)
Back in the fall, we reminded you about the application deadline for the Presidential Management Fellows Program (PMF). In case you’re not familiar with the PMF program, check out the official website.
Now we bring you an update about the program….
Continue reading “Congratuations to the 2012 Presidential Management Fellows Finalists”
Lawyers, have you been looking for a unique way to do some self-branding? Of course, we don’t mean that you should literally brand yourself, but this Mexican lawyer did just that. She turned herself into a walking piece of art, and is now known as the “Vampire Woman” by her colleagues in the tattoo and body modification industry.
We know what you must be thinking: “Aren’t female vampires supposed to be sexy?” That might be the case on True Blood, but we’re not so sure about this girl. They say that beauty is in the eye of the beholder, but the Vampire Woman’s look makes us wonder whether she’s capable of keeping clients from running out of her office screaming. Don’t believe us? See for yourself….
Continue reading “Career Alternatives for Attorneys: Vampire?”
Not shown: the empty bottle of Jack in this guy's carrel.
Last week, I derisively noted that legal blogs were pushing a silly story in U.S. News about great careers that you can pursue with a law degree. No matter how bad legal hiring gets, law schools like pushing the “you can do anything with a law degree” angle, based on the anecdotal evidence of those who were lucky enough to parlay their J.D. degrees into something non-legal.
Obviously, I’ve got some anecdotes of my own.
But here’s a job, a real live job, that’s actually being offered to law students as we speak (or type). If you really want to know “what you can do with a law degree,” take a freaking look….
Continue reading “Things You Can Do With a Law Degree: Bank Teller”
* First the Jones verdict, then the Fourth Circuit affirmed the dismissal of Jose Padilla’s torture lawsuit. It’s enough to make ACLUers develop bipolar disorder. [Washington Post]
* Release the Kagan! The Supreme Court rejected Freedom Watch’s motion for time to argue that Justice Elena Kagan should recuse herself from the Obamacare case. [CNN]
* Biglaw problems: here’s a great round-up of 2012′s law firm lawsuits, starring Akin Gump, Crowell & Moring, Dechert, and Greenberg Traurig, to name a few. [Am Law Daily]
* After dropping a lawsuit challenging their forcible eviction from Zuccotti Park, supporters of Occupy Wall Street will go back to occupying the couches in their parents’ basements. [Bloomberg]
* Not interested in being a lawyer? Check out these suggestions for “unique” career paths (i.e., ones that you could have pursued after college, with half the debt load). [U.S. News]
* Not such a great alternative fee arrangement. A prosecutor turned solo practitioner is going to jail after accepting oxycodone pills as payment from a police informant. [Tampa Bay Times]
Wielding power and oozing prestige, judges can be thought of as “rock stars of the law.” But some judges are, in a more literal sense, rock stars.
Several judges around the country possess impressive musical talents. For example, as we mentioned earlier this month, Judge Randall R. Rader recently rocked out at San Diego’s House of Blues with his band, DeNovo.
Judge Rader is not alone is making music as well as rulings. A Georgia jurist recently released a critically acclaimed album, in which his gavel-wielding fingers strum the guitar alongside some musical greats.
Keep reading for the Above the Law interview with this colorful and creative judge….
Continue reading “Behind the Music, Behind the Bench: Meet Judge Jay Stewart”
There’s a really funny post up on Constitutional Daily, in which the protagonist — who holds a J.D. from NYU Law and was laid off from Biglaw during the recession — recounts his inability to secure a job at Target. It got me thinking of that other great lie that law schools tell incoming law students: “Yada yada, you can do anything with a law degree… also, I’d like to interest you in partial ownership of the Brooklyn Bridge.”
But many J.D. holders have found out the hard way that holding a law degree only opens doors to “law” jobs. They aren’t degrees of general utility.
If anything, they close more doors than they open….
Continue reading “What ‘Can’t’ You Do With a Law Degree?”
If you look back at the great law firm departure memos of years past, you’ll see that almost all of them were written by associates. When partners leave Biglaw, they tend to do so in rather staid fashion, presumably because they have less to complain about (although query whether that’s always the case; see, e.g., A Partner’s Lament).
Every now and then, you’ll come across a colorful farewell message penned by a partner. One such email, sent out last Friday by a longtime partner leaving a major law firm, is now making the rounds. Here’s a teaser: “I have realized that I cannot simultaneously meet the demands of career and family. Without criticizing those who have chosen lucre over progeny, let me just say that I am leaving the practice of law.”
Wow. So who’s the partner in question, which firm did he just leave with such flair, and what’s he planning to do next?
Continue reading “A Farewell to Remember: One Partner’s Dramatic Departure Memo”
My worst day as an artist is better than my best day as a lawyer.
– Nathan Sawaya, former Winston & Strawn attorney turned LEGO artist, commenting on his decision to leave his lucrative Biglaw career to play with toys. His latest exibition, The Art of the Brick, will be on display from December 2, 2011 – February 20, 2012 at the Morris Museum in New Jersey.
It’s a question that seems to be on everyone’s mind lately. With the economy in shambles and people out protesting in the streets, many law students and young lawyers have started to question their decision to attend law school.
Given all of the other opportunities that you may have had, was going to law school the best choice you could have made? If you knew then what you now know, would you still have signed on the dotted line and accepted your seat in the class?
What would you have done instead of going to law school?
Continue reading “Open Thread: What Would You Have Done Instead of Going to Law School?”
Brian Smith no longer has to wear a suit to work.
A few weeks ago, I was drinking an Old Cuban with my roommate at my favorite bar, Grand Tavern. We were sitting on the back patio, when a group of men across from us started talking loudly about Above the Law. My ears perked up, and I began wondering if I might overhear something like this or this.
Fortunately for the gentlemen across the bar, I didn’t hear anything scandalous. Fortunately for me, I did hear them mention Brian Smith, a former associate at Nixon Peabody, who opened the doors to his new business, Huckleberry Bicycles, last Friday in San Francisco.
I met up with Smith last week, and we spoke about how he became a part of our growing club of lawyers not practicing law….
Continue reading “Former Nixon Peabody Associate Opens San Francisco Bike Shop”
Here at Above the Law, we sometimes write about career alternatives for attorneys. But what about attorneys who are living double lives in seemingly conflicting professions — attorneys like Alisha Smith, district attorney-cum-dominatrix extraordinaire?
Today, we bring you a story about an attorney coming straight outta Compton Knoxville.
Enter Lawyer Mike, a man who claims to be the “only rapping lawyer on the planet.” Lawyer Mike rolls hard. Can’t you tell from the picture?
Continue reading “Is This the ‘Only Rapping Lawyer on the Planet’? God, I Hope Not”
Taylor Swift
* Snowtober was a treat for some, but a trick for many more. Let us know how your firm is handling this Halloween horror. Email us or send a text to (646) 820-TIPS. [Reuters]
* Will the legal profession continue to be a slave to ethical rules of the past? Only if lawyers can’t profit from it. And if they can, then say hello to an ABA resolution in 2012. [New York Times]
* Pot trafficker: add this one to the list of career alternatives for attorneys that aren’t working out so well. But if you don’t mind giving up your Benz and getting disbarred, then go for it. [Times Union]
* Yo Taylor, I’m really happy for you, I’mma let you finish, but Beyoncé had one of the best topless trademark lawsuits of all time. One of the best topless trademark lawsuits of all time! [Daily Mail]
* Urine trouble, lady. Here’s some proof that next time things aren’t going your way in court, you should try peeing all over yourself. [New York Post]
In need of legal representation.
* People seriously need to stop complaining about alternative careers for attorneys. Having a JD can lead to a fulfilling career outside of the law, assuming you can make partner at Cravath first. [DealBook / New York Times]
* Due to a decline in filing fees on the killing of the American dream, the Florida court system had to take out a $45.6M loan. It’s kind of like they have their own unpayable mortgage now. Gotta love karma. [Miami Herald]
* The ABA Journal really wants to know how hard it is for recent law school graduates to find a job. Maybe if we flood them with responses, the ABA will give a sh*t. Ugh, I’m way too optimistic. [ABA Journal]
* If you’re willing to move to Iowa, here’s a niche practice alert for you: stripper law. Who thought that you could find work in limiting boob exposure? And why would you want to? [Des Moines Register]
* We all know Michael Jackson was bad, but was he bad enough to drink his propofol straight up? Conrad Murray’s defense team may have changed its tune. [CNN]
* Did a judge seriously think he could arraign someone with close ties to the Wu? He’s lucky True Master didn’t let the killa bees out on his ass. [DNAinfo]
Putting years of legal education to use.
You know things are bad when U.S. News, the Holy Grail for students trying to figure out where to go to law school, is writing articles about all of the non-law related jobs recent graduates are taking just to get by.
This isn’t one of those “oooh, look at all the super-awesome things you can do with a sweet law degree” articles. U.S. News wrote a straight-out “J.D. stands for Just a Dog walker” article.
Everybody who is in law school knows how difficult the job market is. But U.S. News is giving this sobering message about “non-traditional” legal careers to people who have not yet signed up for their own financial doom.
And it turns out that even going to a highly ranked school doesn’t save you from having awful job choices…
Continue reading “Career Alternatives for Attorneys: Being Anything Other Than A Lawyer”
* Will the DOJ ask the 11th Circuit to reconsider Obamacare before appealing to SCOTUS to get the president reeelected? Does a bear sh*t in the woods? [Los Angeles Times]
* The verdict is in on Elena Kagan’s first year on the bench, and one thing’s for sure: the ladies love her. That’s definitely what she said. Right, RBG? [Washington Post]
* Casey Anthony now owes Florida over $217K. That’s almost as much as it costs to raise a child to age 18. Talk about a bad return on an investment. [CNN]
* Antonin Scalia, the Rock Star of One First Street, banned paparazzi from his Duquesne Law appearance. Tiger Beat had to settle for pictures of Taylor Lautner. [Blog of Legal Times]
* Meth dealer: not a viable career alternative for attorneys. This 2011 law school graduate will be heading to jail after she gets her bar exam results. [Richmond Times-Dispatch]
* Never accuse an elderly New Yorker of incest. She might sue, because she “was never that hard up that [she] would tap on family.” You go, girl grandma! [New York Post]
With the legal economy in the toilet, the morale in career services offices has reached an all-time low.
They all know that law school graduates are getting sick and tired of putting the “bar” in barista. They all know that law school graduates living the legal grind are busy serving lattes.
Well aware of these facts, the career services brigade at one highly-ranked law school decided that it was time to put their heads together and come up with a way to make career alternatives look exciting and new….
Continue reading “Career Alternatives for Attorneys: Dictator?”
If learning to do this was mandatory in 3L year, law schools would be doing you a favor.
The stripper with the heart of gold who shakes what her momma gave her to make it through school would be a Disney movie if it didn’t require so much T&A. We know that “I’m doing it to pay for school” is the go-to line whenever you meet a stripper in a situation where she’s expected to keep her clothes on. Most of the women who claim that they need to strip to pay for school haven’t actually read anything since their last visit to the clinic. But for a fair number of strippers, tuition or debt repayment is a chief motivator.
Most women who go to law school think that their advanced education will buy them out of taking their clothes off for money (unless, you know, it’s partner money). But as a practical reality, stripper skills are very useful. It’s a job that can be done while in school or immediately after that pays a lot of money for relatively brainless work. It’s no more exploitative than working a law firm job. And in this economy, that law firm job is probably only available to the few women who are too ugly to strip or are willing to put out.
Hell, as we’ve previously reported, some strip clubs are even proactively screening for advanced degrees.
For today’s tale of a lawyer cum stripper, we have a young lady who has ended up stripping to pay her bills and law school debts. It’s not a sob story, though; she says that in one sense the job is less hostile than any law office she’s worked in…
Continue reading “Career Alternatives for Attorneys: Stripper?
From the Bar to the Pole“
The job market remains challenging for graduating law students. Here at Above the Law, we try to do what we can to bring opportunities to the attention of 3Ls. In recent weeks, we’ve discussed judicial clerkships and the DOJ Honors Program.
Granted, clerkships and the Honors Program are opportunities that are (1) fairly obvious and (2) extremely competitive. Some of you might be asking: Have any other bright ideas, Team ATL?
As a matter of fact, we do….
Continue reading “Reminder: Presidential Management Fellows Applications Are Due Soon”
