Contests

This week, we had many wonderful comments to choose from, simply due to the high number of entertaining stories we’ve written about. But perhaps the most entertaining of all was a story about the daughter of a legendary football coach allegedly getting into a battle royale with one of her former sorority sisters. Because when Kristen Saban dots the “i” in her name with a heart, she does it in blood.

After all, everyone knows that joining a sorority is like taking a pledge of evil — it only takes a little bit of alcohol for all of the demons to escape (and various articles of clothing to come off, but that’s neither here nor there; Google it if you like).

Anyway, let’s find out who won the honorific title of Comment of the Week….

double red triangle arrows Continue reading “Comment of the Week: The Pledge of Evil”

As we’ve noted previously, members of the class of 2011 haven’t done very well in the job market, and their starting salaries are relatively low. As a result, many have decided to throw on their entrepreneurial caps and start their own businesses, law-related or otherwise.

But what if you could merge the law with another profession? Wouldn’t that be a great idea? It looks like someone in the Great White North decided to do just that, but with what seems to be a more lucrative career — lawn maintenance.

Here’s the photo for our latest caption contest….

double red triangle arrows Continue reading “Caption Contest: Employed Nine Months After Graduation in a Full-Time JD Advantage Position”

Early last week, we asked readers to submit possible captions for this photo of a bro and his Cravath duffle bag:

Over the weekend, you voted on the finalists, and now it’s time to announce the winner of our caption contest. As a special bonus, we also have a comment from a “bro” who says he’s the one featured in the photo….

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June wasn’t exactly hot in terms of bonus payouts, but the weather sure heated up quickly. And thanks to the lawyers we’ve singled out for Lawyer of the Month candidacy, June turned into a real scorcher in terms of humorous legal antics and allegations of attorney misconduct.

While some lawyers allegedly participated in scandalous aeronautical activities, others were literally condemned to crappy community service projects. But who will come out on top in our monthly contest?

Take a look at our nominees for June’s Lawyer of the Month and find out….

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With the weather here in New York today, this Columbia Law umbrella is looking more useful than ever before:

Oh, before I forget, I have a little note to anybody who walks around on bright, hot days using an umbrella as a parasol: go f*** yourself. No, I mean that seriously, please take your heavy vinyl rain protection that you’re using because you don’t know the difference between it and a pretensious, lightweight sunshade and shove it up your backside. For the love of God, buy a hat or something….

double red triangle arrows Continue reading “Caption Contest Winner: Columbia Law Provides Quality Street Construction Materials”

Last week, we asked you to submit captions for this photo:

I’m very excited to see what the NYU students readers had to say about this one….

double red triangle arrows Continue reading “Caption Contest Finalists: Columbia Law Provides Quality Street Construction Materials”

We’ve got some major news since our last installment of the Comment of the Week series: the first winner out of four rounds of the competition has claimed his prize. Congratulations again to guest9999999, who proved that at least one person reads these columns. I suppose we’ve got to cherish the small things in life.

This week, when choosing our top comment, we decided to go with one from a post that all of the Above the Law editors thought was pretty funny, but in the end, the topic apparently made our readers believe that I was even dumber than they had originally thought — as if such a thing were even humanly possible.

Of course, I’m talking about the Cooley Law shoeshiner post….

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Shouldn’t law schools just start issuing tents to people at graduation? Or at least umbrellas that could double as tents?

Our last caption contest illustrated the use of law firm swag in a happy locale. Go to Cravath, get a beach towel, and be able to afford a beach vacation.

This caption contest involves the creative use of law school swag. But I don’t think Columbia Law School intended for its umbrellas to be used in this fashion.

At least, I hope this isn’t an intended use of Columbia Law umbrellas…

double red triangle arrows Continue reading “Caption Contest: Columbia Law Provides Quality Street Construction Materials”

A couple of interesting things have happened since we started doing Comment of the Week:

1) Some commenters have raised their game.
2) None of the winners have claimed their T-shirts.

They’re really good T-shirts, people! Cotton. Classy. Hand stitched by Cooley grads. Win one and you’ll see.

This week, I decided to simply take the most liked comment from the most commented story. Occasionally, even a whimsical comment authoritarian should give the people what they want….

double red triangle arrows Continue reading “Comment of the Week: There Was No Contest”

It’s time to announce the winner of May’s Lawyer of the Month competition. This time around, readers had five of our most entertaining lawyers to date to choose from, including allegedly outrageous emailers, super-rude letter writers, and penile picture painters. But at the end of the day, only one lawyer’s “[bleep]hole” was huge enough to get an edge over the rest of last month’s competition.

Let’s see who took home the title of Lawyer of the Month for May, an honor we certainly hope was worth losing his job over….

double red triangle arrows Continue reading “May Lawyer of the Month: He’s Got a ‘Huge [Bleep]hole’!”

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