Craigslist

Pathetic Job Potpourri

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Whenever it feels like things are getting better in the legal economy, Craigslist shows up to remind everybody just how crappy things still are. If you want to know why there is a higher education bubble (and there is a higher education bubble), you need only look at the kind of pathetic salaries offered to people with years of higher education.

Now, if you were exploring the Above the Law jobs board, you wouldn’t be peppered with offers like the ones we’re seeing on Craigslist. But we can’t beat Craigslist for comedic value.

After the jump, check out two “jobs,” which you need years of expensive education and experience to even be in the running for…

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Self-Important Job Listing of the Year (So Far)

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Prima donna, first lady on the stage, but don't you dare, apply or stare, at this law firm.

Do you need a job? Are you willing to work for a pompous jackass? Well, Craigslist (where else?) might have a job for you.

And if you are a lawyer in Austin, you might need a job. The Austin Business Journal reports that one of the city’s most prominent law firms, Clark Thomas & Winters, could be shutting down. They employ 160 people, so there could be some talent hitting the street in Austin.

The newly founded Bargas Law Firm is looking for talent. And even though they’re running around on Craigslist acting like they are God’s gift to junior attorneys, there could be some Texans out there desperate enough to throw in an application…

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Proof That the Legal Job Market Still Sucks

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It’s a little risqué, so we’ve placed it after the jump. If your sensibilities are delicate or you don’t like crudeness, please stop reading here.

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Ladies: A J.D. Will NOT Prevent You From Fulfilling Your Stripper Dreams

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If you can't do this, there's no point in getting a J.D.

Well, I think we are officially at the point in the legal economy where servicing law school debts is just like servicing an expensive drug habit. The parallels between the two are too great to ignore:

  • Is it something you started because everybody else was doing it?
  • Is it something you initially thought was a harmless way to kill some time?
  • Did somebody make wild claims about how “great” it would be for you to try it?
  • Do you find yourself whoring yourself out in order to make money for it?

In the J.D. context, we usually think of “whoring” as a figurative state. But not for much longer.

We already know that many strippers do what they do in order to get money for their drugs. Now, through the wonders of Craigslist, we’re about to see strippers baring all in order to get money for their educational debts.

Sallie Mae might be just a lending institution now, but she dreams of becoming a madam…

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Oregon Fan / Lawyer Seeks Auburn Fan / Hottie for Short-Term Vegas Wedding

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Folks, it doesn’t get any better that this.

As we approach the BCS National Title game, we expect to hear some strange requests from lawyers who are also fans of either Auburn or Oregon. For instance, last year we saw a cleverly written motion to continue from an Alabama lawyer who wanted to see his team play for the title. I expected to see more of the same this year.

I did not expect an attorney who is devoted to the Oregon Ducks to take things to the next level. But then I saw Ryan Tharp’s Craigslist ad. His plan is to watch the game on Monday and then head to Vegas to celebrate (he’s sure he’ll be celebrating).

And the young lawyer wants to have the “entire” Vegas experience — replete with a drunken wedding, preferably to a belle from the defeated fanbase…

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God Awful Jobs for Lawyers Potpourri

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It’s been a while since we took a look at how little lawyers are willing to pay new attorneys. But today we’ve got two jobs which pay a combined salary of $1,000 per/month. I guess these employers are trying to ensure that whoever takes these jobs will show up to work on time because the new employees will leaving for work from the subway station bathroom.

Actually, saying that these two jobs have a combined salary of $1,000 per/month is a little misleading. Our first job pays $1,000, our second one pays nothing at all. It’s always nice to see lawyers who want other lawyers to contribute their legal expertise for $0. It really says a lot about how lawyers themselves value their own profession.

Let’s get to it. I’m sure some of you are at home, ogling daytime cable news anchors, just waiting for the perfect opportunity to fall into your lap…

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A Reminder That Craigslist Casual Encounters Pranks Can Be Criminal Activity

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Casual Encounters of the Unwanted Kind

The people whose stories wind up in ATL’s pages aren’t always psyched to be here. Long-time readers may remember my getting punk’d by a Boston law school student upset about his email flame war with a female lawyer going viral.

The law student placed my photo and cell phone number in a Craigslist Casual Encounters ad on a Sunday afternoon. I always appreciate people setting me up on dates, but not like that. My phone was unusable for an hour due to incoming calls and text messages.

Some urged me to press harassment charges afterward, but I let it go, dismissing it as a stupid, though somewhat amusing, prank. A Massachusetts woman was not as easily amused forgiving as was I. After being pranked in the same way, she went to the police. And the Massachusetts Lawyers Weekly Docket reports that a judge determined that fake Craigslist Casual Encounters promising sexy times can lead to criminal charges. One less non-criminal way you can punk a partner for keeping you at the office late…
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Horny Seton Hall Law Girl Takes to Craigslist

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This is probably a joke. In fact, I’m almost sure this is a joke. Law school women don’t really talk like this, not on Craigslist. And law school guys are more than capable of satisfying their female classmates.

Wait a minute, that last line is false — almost entirely false. Crap, does that make this Craigslist ad real?

I don’t know. There’s a Craigslist ad, purportedly from a Seton Hall law student, that’s making the rounds among people who check out things on Craigslist and then email Above the Law.

Give it a look, then give me your true/false sensibility…

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The Barter Deal From a Law Graduate Craigslist Doesn’t Want You To See

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A posting on Raleigh’s Craigslist board has been flagged for abuse and taken down three times. This post doesn’t use profanity, it doesn’t offer illicit services, there’s really nothing offensive about it.

The Craigslist moderators must just think that it’s a joke. But we’ve seen these type of ads before. A disgruntled law graduate goes onto Craigslist, looking for someone to buy his law degree. It happens.

In the past, as in the case with this Georgetown Law graduate, the J.D. holder has been looking for a little bit of money to offset the massive cost of a degree which cannot be turned into a job. But this new fellow seems to have an even more reasonable request. He just wants to get some lunch out of the deal…

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A Sign of Improvement in the Chicago Legal Market?

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The economy is (hopefully) on the mend. The recession is officially over.

There are signs of recovery in the legal sector, too. For example, law firms are giving away iPads to young associates. Such generosity seems very 2007 (if iPads had existed back then).

Meanwhile, in the less glamorous world of Craigslist postings of legal jobs, things are also improving….

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