* Judge Lance Mason, who was suspended from his duties earlier this year, recently pleaded guilty to charges related to a brutal attack made on his wife. He’ll be sentenced in September, and faces up to 36 months in prison. [Northeast Ohio Media Group]
* No one will be getting lucky in Kentucky under this clerk’s watch: Two months after SCOTUS declared a constitutional right to same-sex marriage, this state court clerk is still turning away gay couples and refusing to issue marriage licenses. [New York Times]
* Per the latest report from Citi Private Bank’s Law Firm Group, even though this year started out well, the bank is revising its financial performance forecast, and not in a good way. Hopefully firms will be able to weather the latest monetary storm. [Am Law Daily]
* Starting in mid-October, lawyers and law firms will be able to purchase .law domain names. A few influential law firms — DLA Piper, Skadden Arps, and SCOTUSblog-affiliated Russell & Goldstein — have gotten first dibs on them. Congrats! [WSJ Law Blog]
* Law librarians at large and medium-sized firms feel underutilized and underpaid, and that’s unfortunate, because like Liam Neeson in Taken, they’ve got a very particular set of skills, skills they’ve acquired over a very long career. [Big Law Business / Bloomberg BNA]
David McCullough’s The Wright Brothers serves as an ideal case study on the requirements to innovate; a desire to learn, perseverance, and work ethic. I read it in route to a wonderful opportunity to serve as visiting lecturer for Professor and Parsons Behle & Latimer attorney Randy Dryer’s innovative Technology and Modern Litigation course at […]
Scary story about a lawyer’s behavior results in immediate suspension.
* “When it’s convenient, we’re alumni; when it’s not convenient, we are not alumni.” Grads of Texas Wesleyan Law — which is now known as Texas A&M Law — are suing because the school won’t grant them new degrees or recognize them as alumni. Harsh, y’all. [Houston Chronicle]
* The ABA Journal wants to know who you think the smartest judge in the U.S. is. Let’s hear it for the wonderful women of the Supreme Court: Justices Sandra Day O’Connor, Ruth Bader Ginsburg, Sonia Sotomayor, and Elena Kagan. [ABA Journal]
* Now that same-sex marriage is legal across the country, it only seems logical that bans on adoptions by same-sex couples should be overturned. Mississippi will have Roberta Kaplan of Windsor fame to thank when its ban is struck down. [New York Times]
* Pa. Attorney General Kathleen Kane has claimed innocence with regard to the criminal charges she recently racked up. She blames the entire ordeal on blowback from the state’s “Porngate” scandal. AG Kane has got one hell of a moneyshot. [Philadelphia Inquirer]
* Did you know that there’s such a thing as barbecue law? Further, did you know that a Biglaw attorney who serves as counsel at Norton Rose Fulbright who’s never handled a barbecue case has cornered the market on BBQ law books (affiliate link)? [Legal Times]
It’ll be terrible if this lawyer’s death becomes another one of Venezuela’s unsolved murders.
* “[H]e’s just a litigious person. Unless he has something going on in the public eye, he can’t exist.” Former Clippers owner Donald Sterling filed a suit against V. Stiviano and TMZ, accusing them of invading his privacy by sharing a recording of his racism. [New York Post]
* A jury found that an ex-municipal court judge who was convicted of insurance fraud was lying when he claimed that he’d been attacked outside the courthouse by thugs wielding a toilet tank lid. We guess you could say that the jurors were able to flush out all of this guy’s crap. [ABA Journal]
* Talk about a Hail Mary suit: Ted Wells of Paul Weiss and NFL locker-room bullying report fame is being sued for defamation by the former Miami Dolphins offensive-line coach who happened to be one of the casualties of his investigation. [Washington Post]
* Deutsche Bank’s general counsel will step down from his position at the end of the year. Deutsche Bank joins JPMorgan and Bank of America as the third big bank to have announced a change in GC within the past month. [Big Law Business / Bloomberg BNA]
* If you’re considering applying to law school, here are five steps you can take to write a “great” personal statement. Surprisingly, one step isn’t mentioning your guaranteed employment at a family firm after graduation. [Law Admissions Lowdown / U.S. News]
* Interesting… audio of Richard Nixon’s only oral argument before the Supreme Court. [Concurring Opinions]
* Aaron Hernandez’s lawyers want his murder indictment tossed. Tom Brady is relieved he now has the second-dumbest Patriots legal challenge. [NECN]
* There’s a robust piranha-smuggling operation in the United States. That’s… Sharknado levels of terrifying. [Legal Juice]
* In between ripping Rosie O’Donnell, the GOP “debate” actually talked a little about the Constitution. [Dorf on Law]
* God Donald Trump is entertaining. [What About Clients?]
* Why aren’t the poor a suspect class? [PrawfsBlawg]
* Graffiti artist Rime alleges that Katy Perry wore a dress designed by Moschino that ripped off some of his copyrightable work. This dark horse has injected herself into a lot of IP issues this year. Your lawyer fans thank you. [WSJ Law Blog]
* The Seventh Circuit is totally sorry about the case that it completely forgot about for the past five years. It seems that the court pleadings were “placed in the wrong stack” on remand from the Supreme Court in 2010. Congratulations, America: This is your justice system. Oopsie! [ABA Journal]
* Pennsylvania Attorney General Kathleen Kane has been charged with perjury, conspiracy, obstructing justice, and several other crimes in connection with a grand jury leak. She’s the second state AG to be criminally charged this week. Nice job. [USA Today]
* Arizona Summit Law filed a motion to dismiss former employee and alumnus Paula Lorona’s pro se retaliation and consumer fraud lawsuit with prejudice. The school claims the complaint is pleaded deficiently. Well… you educated her. [National Law Journal]
* Rapper Busta Rhymes was charged with second degree assault this week after he allegedly threw a protein drink at a gym employee. His lawyer calls the charge “a bunch of bull.” Hmm, we apparently should’ve listened when he told us he was dangerous. [MTV]
* The Washington NFL team has filed a notice of appeal to the Fourth Circuit over their canceled trademark registrations as they move their failure off the field and into the courts. [Bloomberg BNA]
* Penn State unveils a new logo. Critics call it a “hypnotized dog looking at cupcakes,” but it actually looks more like the vacant stare of someone who has seen something but refuses to tell authorities about it. [TaxProf Blog]
* How to take good notes. Apparently, “actually take notes” is the first step. Good to know. [Survive Law]
* Congrats to occasional Legal Cheek blogger Amy Woolfson on her Harvard Law scholarship. Welcome to our side of the pond. [Legal Cheek]
* Understand the tax implications of your student loan forgiveness program. [Lawyerist]
The Eighth Circuit should soon decide if you can go to jail for doing nothing wrong.
Which law school does he attend?
* Another American doctor is accused of illegally killing another lesser-known lion in Zimbabwe, but this time, Biglaw is in the doctor’s corner. Apparently when you’re a hunter who’s become the hunted, you turn to Blank Rome. [Am Law Daily]
* Where Dewey eat when allegedly conspiring to scam the firm’s creditors about its financial situation? According to testimony in the D&L trial, criminal activity reportedly tastes better when paired with fine dining experiences. [WSJ Law Blog]
* At some point in the very near future, it’s likely that one or more new Supreme Court justices will need to be appointed, and some say that it’s obvious that Justice Don Willett, the Tweeter Laureate of Texas, is plotting a course to be a nominee. #blessed [Forbes]
* The Fourth Circuit handed down an important opinion on cellphone location records, and it looks like the police need a warrant. Thanks for the circuit split. Quick, someone write a law review note before SCOTUS takes it. [Volokh Conspiracy / Washington Post]
* For some would-be law students, applying early decision may not be the right choice. After all, if you think you can get into ALL of the T14 schools, we bet you’d probably like to see if your huge ego is correct. [Law Admissions Lowdown / U.S. News & World Report]
* George W. Bush shows up for jury duty. Sadly he wasn’t empaneled, which was a real shame for the prosecutors because you know he doesn’t need actual evidence to make bold decisions. [ABC News]
* Here’s a clever way to get out of a traffic stop: call in a nearby murder. [Legal Juice]
* Performance-enhancing drugs are becoming a scourge in… eSports. Apparently getting really twisted on Adderall and playing StarCraft II for money is a thing. Well, pack it in everyone. We had a good run, human civilization. [The Legal Geeks]
* “A wealthy oligarchy of donors is dominating the 2016 election.” Not true. Based on the polls it’s dominated by an oligarchy of one. [Election Law Blog]
* “Pay your f**king bill… don’t be a f**king shlub.” [South Florida Lawyers]
* Lex Machina is offering a free trial to its news Trademark Litigation Update newsletter. [Lex Machina]
This judge’s tough-talking ways seem ripe for daytime television programming.
Everything’s bigger in Texas, including the criminal charges against their attorney general.
Even after the Rolling Stone debacle, many dubious beliefs persist about women who allege that they have been sexually assaulted, the men those women accuse, and how the media reports on it.