* Oh, the Onion… what would I do without you? Their take on gay marriage is masterful, as always. [Onion]
* Conservatives, troubled with the Supreme Court’s decision in Obergefell v. Hodges, vow to move to Canada. There’s only one teeny, tiny problem with their plan… about a decade in the making. [BuzzFeed]
* Of all the arrogant, jiggery-pokery, pure applesauce, Putsch! Find out exactly how Justice Scalia would mock you in this fun insult generator. [Slate]
* Some Alabama counties have come up with a crackerjack way to avoid marrying same sex couples. [Vox]
* The only way to get to today’s historical gay marriage case was to defeat the nomination of Judge Robert Bork, and Reagan aides always suspected this would happen. [Roll Call]
* For marriage equality fans with a sweet tooth. [Ben & Jerry’s]
* Surely you jest! Justice Scalia? Intellectually inconsistent to fit a political agenda? Pshaw. [BloombergView]
* A handy guide to today’s landmark SCOTUS decision. [Legal IO]
* News you can use: what is the legal status of cursing at cops? [The Marshall Project]
It turns out that his accuser wasn’t exactly a paragon of fashion virtue.
ATL Academy For Private Practice Volume 1 – Getting Started offers a mix of deeply informed, sometimes contrarian, but always thoughtful insight into meeting the challenges of starting and optimizing your own practice. Click here to download.
One Yale law student has seriously ticked off some members of the Yale Club of New York City.
Coach Mike Leach admits he used some choice words when he locked a former player in a shed.
* Federal judges frequently fly across the globe on other people’s dime for conferences and symposia, but 2012′s most frequent flyer is a judge who was recently embroiled in an ethics scandal: Randall Rader of the Federal Circuit. [National Law Journal]
* Even though she claims nothing is “fundamentally broken,” Securities and Exchange Commission chairwoman Mary Jo White proposed “sweeping” new stock market regulations in an attempt to get with the times. [DealBook / New York Times]
* U. of Maine wants to combine its business and law schools, but professors are concerned about pressing questions like, “What will the diploma say?” rather than, “Do I get to keep my job?” [Portland Press Herald]
* Law schools are seen as cash cows for their affiliated undergraduate universities, but this law school is hurting so bad for cash due to low enrollment the university is infusing it with millions. [Minnesota Daily]
* A Pennsylvania man is suing his local police department for First Amendment violations after he was arrested for cursing in front of officers. N.W.A has a song this guy would like. [Pittsburgh Post-Gazette]
Most people will dismiss this guy’s post as an unhinged rant. Most people are also stupid.
Which former Dewey & LeBoeuf partner referred to various former partners as “pathetic,” “little prick,” and “f**kwad”?
A wide-ranging interview with Justice Scalia, covering everything from his pet peeves (women cursing), his tastes in television, and his desire to hire more law clerks from “lesser” law schools.
Casetext is offering select students the opportunity to gain real entrepreneurial experience while in school as part of its law student ambassador program.
* “Did the imperative use of the F-bomb … threaten judicial authority?” Wow, seriously? This is perhaps the most entertaining question presented for review in a Supreme Court certiorari petition in the history of man. [National Law Journal]
* Boy, Dewey have some expensive paintings for you to buy! This failed firm’s art collection will be hitting the auction block in February, and the entire LeBoeuf lot is supposedly worth $2.3M, but most pieces are pretty damn ugly. [WSJ Law Blog (sub. req.)]
* When anonymous commenting goes wronger-er: Jim Letten, U.S. Attorney for the Eastern District of Louisiana, has resigned amid the scandal caused by his underlings’ obnoxious comments. [Times-Picayune]
* Your employers really don’t want pictures of your office holiday party antics going viral online (but we do). Here are some of the many ways they’ll try to keep you from becoming internet famous. [Corporate Counsel]
* George Zimmerman, the man accused of killing Trayvon Martin, is suing NBCUniversal, alleging that the network and Today show reporters committed serious “journalistic crimes.” [Media Decoder / New York Times]
* “Our assets went home every night, until one night, they went home and never came back.” Aww, Dewey shed a tear for this bankrupt law firm? Nah. [Thomson Reuters News & Insight]
* It looks like SCOTUS Justice Clarence Thomas decided to kiss and make up with his alma mater, Yale Law School. He’ll be the keynote speaker at an alumni dinner in D.C. this summer. [Reuters]
* And the marriage equality battle has finally arrived in Obama’s former stomping grounds. Lambda Legal and the ACLU are challenging the ban on gay marriage in Illinois. [Associated Press]
* The biggest news out of the John Edwards trial yesterday was that Judge Eagles told the alternate jurors they didn’t have to show up anymore. OMG, boring. Give us a verdict already. [ABC News]
* Kim Dotcom and his company’s defense against the DOJ’s charges is coming together piece by piece. If only Megaupload were a torrent site, this would be a much better nerd joke. [Media Decoder / New York Times]
* The ABA Journal wants to know if you curse in the workplace, and if so, in what situations. We bet that a fair share of Biglaw associates were dropping f-bombs left and right over this year’s bonuses. [ABA Journal]