DLA Piper

Horrific news, as associate identified as victim in brutal stabbing.

A caveat tacked on to the end of this firm's bonus memo really ticked off our tipsters.

2014 was a banner year for lateral movement in the legal industry. But, which law firms hired the most lateral partners? Which firms had the greatest number of partner defections?

Throughout 2014, along with our friends at Good2BSocial, ATL once again researched the social media practices of law firms. Today we publish the first component of our findings: our second annual Social Law Firm Index, where we identify which specific firms are making the most effective use of social media.

* Senate Republicans are contemplating abolishing filibusters for SCOTUS nominees. This could go one of two ways: it could work out nicely for them, or explode in their faces. It’s like a choose your own adventure game. [POLITICO]

* When it comes to the upcoming gay marriage cases before SCOTUS, “[e]very lawyer involved will want to argue.” Remember, when you’re given the chance to make history, you better hope that you’re on the right side of it. [National Law Journal]

* “[I]f there is one decision I would overrule, it is Citizens United.” Even RBG thinks this campaign finance decision is one of the Supreme Court’s “darkest hour[s].” [Salon]

* SCOTUS refused to stay Charles Warner’s execution, but it agreed to grant cert on his lethal injection case days after his death. Better late than never? [New York Times]

* The NFL has drafted Ted Wells of Paul Weiss to blow up the absurd controversy that is “Deflategate.” Come on, who cares if the Patriots cheated again? [WSJ Law Blog]

* Do you know any chronic Biglaw firm-hoppers? How many firms are too many to lateral to? Three? Five? Seven? Jesus Christ, for this guy, try 10 firms. [Am Law Daily]

Check out the magnificent mansion that helped drive a rainmaker into bankruptcy.

* Ted Cruz Goes To Jury Duty is the Ernest Goes To Camp of a new generation. [NBC News]

* Former Judge Mike Maggio has graced our pages with his disgrace before when he admitted to making racist and sexist remarks about Charlize Theron’s adoption. Well, he just pleaded guilty to federal bribery charges. Looks like he’ll Geaux to prison. [Arkansas Times]

* Faced with allegations that it discriminated against a trans woman, Saks takes the curious legal stance that it had the legal right to discriminate. I’d say that takes balls, but… [Slate]

* A hearing board in Illinois just recommended a one-year suspension of former Sidley Austin and present DLA Piper attorney Lee Smolen. Maybe he could spend that time with his kids. [Legal Profession Blog]

* Fourth Circuit rules that you can’t set up unconstitutional barriers to abortion. Nothing to do with the woman’s rights of course, but because it might impact the doctor’s free speech. [Dorf on Law]

* Fired for wife-swapping. [Lowering the Bar]

* Jones Day accuses a federal judge of bias in benchslap appeal. Meanwhile, trial lawyers are filing amicus briefs backing the judge. [ACEDS]

* Technology and outsourcing have totally jacked the careers of Biglaw associates. You already knew this, but now there’s a paper! [TaxProf Blog]

How does a rainmaker earning millions of dollars a year wind up in personal bankruptcy?

* An “America’s Next Top Model” contestant sued Tyra Banks, claiming she was disqualified from the title because Banks found out she had worked as an escort. You’re looking for people who can walk back and forth in heels over and over. Who did you think was trying out for the show? [Courthouse News Service]

* Dewey know which DLA Piper department head just declared personal bankruptcy? [New York Times]

* Coming soon to the hipster haven near you: the artisanal attorney. Hilarious satirical piece by John Frank Weaver. [McSweeney’s]

* Are you getting married? Are you planning to change your name? Huge mistake. The name part at least. Maybe the married part, I don’t know your deal. [The American Lawyer]

* The Onion surveys the reaction to the Columbia Law exam policy. [The Onion]

* You can’t force welfare recipients to get drug tests. Which was kind of obvious but still required a court to weigh in. [Pathologyblawg]

* A New York judge allegedly stroked his secretary’s face, forced her to give him hugs, and regaled her with explicit tales of sex with his mistress. [New York Post]

* There’s a wealth of information in this post about the ABA 509 Information Reports. Keith Lee does a year-over-year comparison of the top ten and bottom ten schools, looking for trends. [Associate’s Mind]

* A BC government official has revoked approval of a law school based upon a pledge to discriminate against “the gays.” [Trinity Western University]

Law firm mergers are often bad ideas; if you're going to do one, do it right.

Did you hear that sound? Listen carefully. What is that row? It’s the sound of alternative legal providers’ footfalls, gaining on you.

Why is the social-media giant suing the Biglaw behemoth?

* Baker & McKenzie was bumped from the top spot in the Global 100 last year when DLA Piper swooped in to steal the firm’s glory. This year, B&M is back with a vengeance, and richer than ever. Take that, DLA dopes. [Am Law Daily]

* “I’m pretty sure I just got fired.” Before the bud business was big enough for Biglaw, the mere suggestion of going green was allegedly enough to warrant some pretty major disciplinary action from a leading law firm. [National Law Journal]

* Judge Thomas Griesa is toying with holding Argentina in contempt for saying that it didn’t default. Argentina struck back with the social media hashtag #GrieFault. Clever. [DealBook / New York Times]

* Dzhokhar Tsarnaev’s defense team has an expert who says that any jury in Massachusetts will be tainted because of the “inflammatory” news coverage of the Boston Marathon bombing. [WSJ Law Blog]

* The ABA’s new Task Force on the Financing of Legal Education held its first public hearing to try to figure out why law school tuition is high. The ABA is so late to the party it’s not even funny. [ABA Journal]

* A DLA Piper partner was cleared by the firm in connection with a string of sexist emails exchanged with a client because real lads don’t get in trouble for such trifling behavior. We’ll have more on this later. [Am Law Daily]

* Patton Boggs partners started voting on the firm’s merger with Squire Sanders yesterday. Apparently there’s at least one partner who will not be allowed to join the new firm because of prior conduct. Sucks to be you, guy. [Reuters]

* “It’s the best way to prepare for a whole variety of things.” Right now is one of the best times to go to law school, say California law school deans who really need to get asses in empty seats. [Daily Transcript]

* ““We are a better people than what these laws represent.” Pennsylvania’s ban on gay marriage was struck down yesterday, making it the 14th victory in a row for the marriage equality movement. [Bloomberg]

* Showtime just bought a law firm comedy about “four smartass, workaholic associates” in Biglaw trying to make partner and avoid being murdered by the office serial killer at the same time. Uh, yeah. [Deadline]

Which Biglaw firms have the strongest Ukrainian offices? There's a ranking for that (of course).

* SCOTUS seems divided over its greenhouse gas regulation case. Just remember, justices, there’s “no such thing as greenhouse gas,” and if you think there is, you can “go f@ck yourself and die.” [Legal Times]

* DLA Piper, Fenwick & West, and William Fry are advising on the King.com (aka Candy Crush) IPO. Cool. Know that the public will refuse to invest until those damn chocolate blockers go away. [The Lawyer]

* “Guys like them are the reason people hate lawyers.” When your lawyers do you this badly, you end up living in one of their homes as part of a settlement. Of course this happened in Florida. [Sun Sentinel]

* If you’re in the market for an apartment, we hear Brooklyn Law School just sold a bunch of its student housing to a real estate developer. Per the dean, the school is now so small the apartments were unnecessary. Yikes. [Brooklyn Daily Eagle]

* Amanda Bynes took a plea deal on her DUI charge. She’ll serve three years of probation and pay a fine. Maybe when she’s done, she’ll pull a Lohan and appear naked in a movie. Young men can hope. [CNN]

* A Miami attorney is gearing up for legalized medical marijuana. He’s even selling franchises, hopefully called McKinebud’s. [Daily Business Review] * Is Gwyneth cheating on Chris Martin with an entertainment lawyer? [Defamer] * A Florida village has become a refuge to sex offenders because there’s nowhere else they can go. Isn’t this the plot of Arrested Development? [Agence France-Presse via Yahoo!] * As if law schools aren’t charging enough, they also absolutely ravage students on casebook prices. It doesn’t have to be this way. [PrawfsBlawg] * Who’d have thought it would be this hard to define a pig? [Modern Farmer] * If you aren’t following DLA Piper’s boss Sir Nigel Knowles on Twitter, then… you’re lucky. [Legal Cheek] * The vice president of the Constitutional Accountability Center weighs in on Judge Wright Allen’s marriage equality decision from the perspective of a gay, married Virginian. [Pilot Online] * See, it’s not just lawyers who get annoyed when TV doesn’t live up to the realities of the profession. Political communications professionals can get pretty irked by House of Cards. [Ditto Public Affairs] * A circuit judge just seized control of a lower court’s docket, setting restrictions on a judge’s ability to hear domestic violence cases after finding a repeated pattern of improperly blowing off these matters. It may be the Benchslap-Heard-Round-the-Nation since the slapped jurist is also the president-elect of the American Judges Association. [Detroit Free Press]

* Secrets secrets are no fun, secrets secrets hurt someone: Chief Justice Roberts named two judges to two secret courts. Congrats to Judges Boasberg and Tallman. [Legal Times]

* Bankruptcy just got a lot more fabulous. AG Eric Holder announced that the government would extend recognition of same-sex couples in federal legal matters. [New York Times]

* With reports of firms’ financials beginning to trickle out, partners are getting anxious. No one wants to be the next Dewey — or the next Gregory Owens. [Am Law Daily]

* This is the second year in a row that Greenberg Traurig has posted financial declines. Perhaps the firm started its lower pay, non-partner track residency program for a reason. Something to think about. [Daily Business Review]

* “It’s our duty as partners to help.” Law students articling at the recently dissolved Heenan Blaikie are learning a lesson in Canadian collegiality. The firm is trying to help them get new jobs. [Montreal Gazette]

* Speaking of Heenan Blaikie, we’re hearing chatter that the firm’s talks with DLA Piper may be in trouble. HB says the talks they’re off, but DLA says they’re ongoing. Hmm, that sounds dramatic. [WSJ Law Blog]

* “It’s a very L.A. thing. We’ll see how long it lasts.” If you had to choose, you’d probably go to Dumb Starbucks over Starbucks. Order a Dumb Frappuccino before they get a C&D letter. [Los Angeles Times]

You'll want to keep reading, because this is the largest law firm to ever fail....

* Morgan Stanley will settle with the Federal Housing Finance Authority for $1.25 billion to resolve a suit over the sale of craptastic mortgage-backed securities. It’ll be the third-largest settlement of its kind. [DealBook / New York Times]

* “Sometimes the voters and the legislature get it wrong. So, we have you.” With those bold words from Ted Olson, the federal judge overseeing the challenge to Virginia’s ban on gay marriage has promised a speedy ruling in the case. [Washington Post]

* DLA Piper announced changes to its leadership, naming Roger Meltzer and Nigel Knowles as Earth’s co-chairs. We look forward to news on the DLA Venus and Mars outposts. [WSJ Law Blog]

* In other DLA Piper news, it looks like the one of the world’s largest firms may be coming to the rescue of a Canadian Biglaw firm in financial trouble. Welcome aboard, Heenan Blaikie lawyers! [Globe and Mail]

* Dean Michael Fitts of Penn Law School is leaving his position after 15 years to take a position as the president of Tulane University. There’s no word yet on who’ll serve as interim dean. [Daily Pennsylvanian]

* In case you haven’t heard about it yet, a former Roger Williams Law student was involved in an all-day standoff with police after threatening school administrators. We may have more on this. [ABC 6 News]