Drugs

Cocaine's a hell of a drug, eh judge?

* A Connecticut attorney was cited for dropping two ounces of weed on a courtroom floor, and he blames it on his client’s son. They were apparently going to stage an embarrassing intervention, but it was the attorney who wound up being embarrassed. [Hartford Courant]

* While Charleston School of Law bides its time and attempts to resist a buyout from the InfiLaw System, the school has offered many of its existing faculty members buyouts. We’ll have more on this interesting development later today. [Charleston Post & Courier]

* Pace Law is going to slash its tuition for incoming students with qualifying GPAs and LSAT scores to match the tuition of the in-state public law school of the student’s home state. Sorry, folks, but this tuition “fire sale” is only for new students. [WSJ Law Blog]

* Hiscock & Barclay is “dating,” “not engaged,” and “not even close to to getting married” to Damon Morey. There may not be “anything close to official,” but this seems like the very hesitant precursor to an arranged marriage, if I do say so myself. [Buffalo Law Journal]

* Per a recent study, the closer your law firm is to your law school, the more likely it is that you’ll make partner. In fact, it doesn’t even matter if you went to an elite law school — you’re still more likely to make partner if your alma mater is nearby. [New York Times]

* Appalachian Law may be a “fourth tier” school, it may be much smaller than it once was, and it may have lowered its admissions standards, but you better believe the little law school that could is going to be just fine. Don’t stop believin’, Appalachian! [WCYB]

* Mitt Romney is going to fight Evander Holyfield. Man, Romney has been beaten by a black guy like that since 2012. Oooh, also, Floyd Mayweather just found his next opponent. [CNN]

* Alabama Supreme Court Chief Justice Roy Moore’s son was arrested and charged with drug possession yesterday and then blamed the media… somehow. I blame the moral vacuum created when they took down the Ten Commandments. [Al.com]

* The long-awaited Justice Scalia play is out. It’s like Tony and Tina’s Wedding with more gun control and abortion. [WTOP]

* Professor Baude has a cute theory how the Obama administration could ignore a negative verdict in King v. Burwell. [New York Times]

* Not everyone thinks Professor Baude’s hypothetical is a serious option. [Concurring Opinions]

* Israel has blocked polling in advance of the election to prevent bandwagon voting. Professor Somin evaluates the efficacy of the plan. It probably won’t affect the outcome, but if you thought Republicans threw a hissy-fit over the polls in 2008 and 2012, wait until a candidate they really care about loses. [The Volokh Conspiracy / Washington Post]

* A nice little maxim (get it?) for the trial lawyer looking to hone their craft. Of course, if you show them a glint of broken glass in the first act, it better be the murder weapon in the second act. [What About Clients?]

* Speaking of second acts, this profile of former Skadden partner Harriet Posner discusses life after Biglaw. [A Lawyer’s Life]

* When the judge starts quoting Monty Python, it means he hates you. [Lowering the Bar]

* When a tax official died at the office, it took his co-workers two days to notice. To paraphrase Roger Sterling, “he died as he lived: surrounded by people who didn’t pay attention to him.” [TaxProf Blog]

* What makes a client want to hire a particular lawyer? Is it Throwback Thursday pics of the lawyers as kids? No? These lawyers think it is. [Legal Cheek]

* The “stop hitting yourself theory of statutory interpretation” is my new favorite canon. [Lawyers, Guns & Money]

* Radio Shack is going under, which is the perfect time to ask: what if it was a HYDRA front all along? [The Legal Geeks]

* If America wants to incarcerate fewer people, it needs to take a hard look at what it plans to do with violent offenders, because they’re a bigger part of the prison system than most realize. [PrawfsBlawg]

* Today would be Jack Kerouac’s 93rd birthday. In case you wanted to imagine a life unchained from your desk, you should read some of his stuff. [What About Clients?]

There's a lot of anger over HOW she was arrested, but there should be a lot more concern over WHY she was arrested at all.

The opportunities for Native American Tribes in the cannabis industry are vast, and many tribes will immensely benefit from cannabis while others will opt out entirely.

Ed. note: Due to the Presidents’ Day holiday, we will be on a reduced publication schedule today. We will still be publishing, but less frequently than usual. We will be back in full force tomorrow.

* The news is in, and it seems that Davis Polk’s financial numbers were at record highs. The firm’s revenue beat the $1 billion mark for the first time ever, and its PPP rose to $3.29 million. No wonder its 2014 bonuses were so awesome! [Am Law Daily]

* Yes, we know that William Mitchell Law and Hamline Law are merging to survive as a result of a quickly disappearing applicant pool. We’d really love to know how many other law schools are considering this as an alternative to closing their doors. [Star Tribune]

* How are Nebraska and Oklahoma, which neighbor Colorado, where marijuana has been legalized, handling the situation? Not well. Their AGs want SCOTUS to rule the weed law in the state where you can get Rocky Mountain High is unconstitutional. [PBS NewsHour]

* Thanks to a recent ABA rule change, schools are beginning to admit students without LSAT scores. One of those schools is Iowa Law (ranked in the top 30 by U.S. News), but those students need to have done really well on other standardized tests. [Daily Iowan]

* “How have I done as a judge today?” “Not bad, but you could do better.” Judge John Hurley had a run-in with an 80-year-old criminal defendant who wouldn’t stop calling him sweetheart. Flip to the next page to see the entertaining video. [NBC 6 South Florida]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=mEQp33kr2O8#t=0

As marijuana businesses seek to capture as many deductible expenses as they can, they run the real risk of the IRS disagreeing and finding themselves audited or hit with a penalty.

* Lindsay Lohan and her mom are suing Fox News with claims the TV network defamed them by saying “Lindsay Lohan’s mom is doing cocaine with her.” Legal experts are of the opinion the Lohans must be doing lines if they think they’ll win. [U.S. News & World Report]

* A prospective juror in the Colorado movie theater massacre case was released after telling a judge she brought her unvaccinated grandchild to court and ripping her hair out. Well, that’s one way to get out of jury duty. [Aurora Sentinel]

* Justice Elena Kagan says that if she hadn’t left her Harvard Law deanship to become solicitor general, she “[doesn’t] think [she] would be doing law, quite honestly.” The Supreme jurist says that “[i]t shows you how weird life can be.” [Supreme Court Brief]

* Lawyers in New York are worried that if the state adopts the Uniform Bar Exam, the “gold standard” of having passed the tougher version of the New York exam will be devalued. Aww, sorry about your butthurt. Get well soon. [New York Law Journal]

* Fresh off an 18-month tour of racking up insider trading convictions as a federal prosecutor in the Southern District of New York, Richard Tarlowe will join Paul Weiss to focus on white-collar criminal defense. Best of luck. [DealBook / New York Times]

What can landlords and tenants do to prevent asset forfeiture or federal intervention altogether?

Disturbing allegations of assaults at a law school.

So long as marijuana remains a Schedule I drug, marijuana businesses will continue to experience difficulties stemming from conflict with federal laws.

The criminal trial began with a surprising admission... and then took off from there.

* Here’s some JOLTing news: Megon Walker, the Harvard Law graduate who claims her life was ruined because the school accused her of being a plagiarist, just lost her defamation suit against her alma mater. [National Law Journal]

* “You have a party like this and it’s as though you’re handing out hand grenades as party favors.” Jeff Lake, a California lawyer, was arrested and faces social host liability issues thanks to his kid’s Playboy party. [Denver Channel]

* Congress is back in session, and President Obama resubmitted his nomination of Loretta Lynch for U.S. attorney general, along with other judicial nods. She’ll be a “terrific attorney general,” so get this show on the road. [Legal Times]

* “How many clinics do you have to close before the court says, ‘Enough’?” Lawyers for abortion clinics and Texas state attorneys faced off before the Fifth Circuit over the viability constitutionality of the Lone Star State’s abortion laws. [New York Times]

* It’s a new year with new laws in effect, and it looks like 27 states, plus D.C., have made major moves with regard to weed, be it through the legalization medical marijuana or decriminalization of its possession. Do you know your rights? [CNN]

* Per the Department of Education, Harvard Law sucks at handling sexual assault and harassment complaints. As it turns out, the DoE only found out about the misconduct because a faculty member from New England Law snitched on the Ivy League school. [Boston.com]

* Everything’s bigger in Texas, including the penalties for pot possession. One state legislator wants to change that in the new year, and hopes his colleagues will puff, puff, pass his bill in favor of small civil fines instead of jail sentences. [VICE]

* “If the court has been waiting until the country is more comfortable with gay marriage, they’ve waited long enough.” The first SCOTUS conference of 2015 will focus on gay marriage cases. It’d be fabulous if they took one. [Supreme Court Brief]

* Latham and Fried Frank are going to be advising on Shake Shack’s initial public offering. Hungry attorneys working on the IPO will be disappointed to learn that their client doesn’t have any public offerings for consumption on Seamless. [Am Law Daily]

* The bankruptcy trustee for the late, great, defunct firm of Howrey LLP keeps lining up big settlements for its remaining creditors. This time, Wiley Rein will contribute $1 million to the failed firm’s coffers. Howrey like dem apples? [Wall Street Journal]

If these allegations are true, perhaps partners aren't being paid enough?

* Still looking for a great gift for your assistant? Corporette presents their annual secretary gift guide! [Corporette]

* Marijuana law may be hot, but marijuana legalization may be in hot water: Oklahoma and Nebraska take their case to the Supreme Court that Colorado’s law is damaging them. [The Denver Post]

* Associates are super excited about their shiny — but discretionary — bonuses. Note that base pay hasn’t taken a similar leap. Thanks for throwing a wet blanket on the season. [Law and More]

* Who are the new lawyers in Congress? Mike Sacks profiles them. [National Law Journal]

* The law firm trying to kill the internet is Jenner & Block. That’s unfair — the law firm employed by people trying to kill the internet is Jenner & Block. And they’re willing to write a whole letter and make a state Attorney General just sign it! That’s some pull. [The Verge]

* At this special time of year, let’s remember who this season is all about: pagans. [What About Clients?]

* U.S. District Judge Algenon L. Marbley just resigned to settle an ethics probe. Not as a federal judge of course, but as a trustee to THE Ohio State University. The Ohio Ethics Commission raised issues with Judge Marbley serving as a trustee while simultaneously teaching as an adjunct at the law school. [Columbus Dispatch]

* Brad and Da Boyz with a nice little ditty about copyright infringement and fair use. [YouTube]

* A third-year student from the Louisiana State University Law Center was indicted for allegedly raping one woman and allegedly sexually assaulting and attempting to rape another. He’s currently free on bail under GPS monitoring supervision. [The Advocate]

* Here’s some news you can potentially use (with extreme caution): you may be able to give a law firm partner the finger and still be eligible to receive unemployment benefits after you’ve been fired for flipping the bird. [Madison St. Clair Record]

* Ever go to law school? Ever go to law school… on weed? Lots of law schools are adding courses related to marijuana law to their curricula because “[f]or most students, this is an inherently interesting topic.” Yessir, it is. [National Law Journal]

* Hmm, this advice article says you should evaluate your GPA and LSAT score to determine which law schools to apply to, but we know the only real qualification is a pulse. This is confusing. [Law Admissions Lowdown / U.S. News & World Report]

* The Federal Communications Commission renewed a radio license for a station owned by Washington Redskins’ owner Dan Snyder, despite the fact that the agency’s chairman previously called the team name “offensive and derogatory.” [WSJ Law Blog]

The attorney in question had two licenses suspended: her driver's license AND her law license.

* “I think the court has to take a case now. This is their job.” It’s time to hurry up and wait: SCOTUS is running down the clock when it comes to taking a gay marriage case this Term. [National Law Journal]

* Zach Warren will be tried separately from the former leaders of D&L on criminal charges in the wake of the firm’s failure. Dewey think lawyers still care about him? [DealBook / New York Times]

* Good news, everyone! According to the Bureau of Labor Statistics, the legal sector added 300 jobs in October. This sure is exciting for the fraction of the class of 2014 that number represents. [Am Law Daily]

* A Long Island attorney requested that one of her trials be postponed during her high-risk pregnancy, but lawyers from the S.D.N.Y. allegedly “shouted at and insulted” her in response. Wow. 🙁 [New York Times]

* Since enrollment dropped off, law schools are competing to attract transfer students. Georgetown, for example, recently took more than 100 transfers — a 75 percent increase in two years. [Washington Post]

* Just because your state puff, puff, passed the vote to legalize smoking pot, it doesn’t mean you won’t be fired for doing it. Careful with your dope, unless you’d like to see your career go up in smoke. [CNN Money]