Drugs

How is technology shaping the world in which we live, affecting legal and illegal activities alike? Some thoughts from Jason Thomas of Thomson Reuters.

* Woody Allen’s lawyer, Elkan Abramowitz, responds to Dylan Farrow’s account of alleged sexual abuse at the hands of her famous father. [Gawker; Gothamist] * Sound advice from Professor Glenn Reynolds on how not to increase applications to your law school. [Instapundit] * What is a “nitro dump,” and will it provide information about who (or what) killed Philip Seymour Hoffman? [ATL Redline] * “Is Elena Kagan a ‘paranoid libertarian?’ Judging by [Cass] Sunstein’s definition, the answer is yes.” [Reason via Althouse] * A petition of possible interest to debt-laden law school graduates: “Increase the student loan interest deduction from $2,500 to the interest actually paid.” [WhiteHouse.gov] * Vivia Chen wonders: Is Amy Chua, co-author of The Triple Package (affiliate link), being attacked as racist in a way that it itself racist? [Time] * Yikes — journalists around the country have been receiving “a flurry of subpoenas in recent months,” according to Jeff Kosseff of Covington & Burling. [InsideTechMedia] * Congratulations to Orrick’s 15 new partners — an impressively diverse group, from a wide range of practice areas and from offices around the world. [Orrick Herrington & Sutcliffe]

* Quinn Emanuel got a pretty harsh benchslap from Judge Paul Grewal over its litigation strategy in the Apple / Samsung case, calling it “650 lawyers wide and one lawyer deep.” Sick burn, Judge. [Courthouse News Service]

* At Cardozo Law, Jordan Belfort’s former lawyer says that the movie Wolf of Wall Street “played down the sex and drugs.” Dear Lord, if that’s the case, Leo’s muse should be happy he’s alive. [DealBook / New York Times]

* “I’ve been around the block. And I’ve never seen an attorney general sanctioned.” Ahh, the rarest rose. Nevada’s AG was sanctioned for failing to provide evidence in a fraud case against a mortgage lender. [Forbes]

* Eighteen people were arrested for their alleged attempts to market and sell Super Bowl “party packs” to football fans. It’s pretty sick, but you’d got to admit that hookers and blow beat wings any day of the week. [Bloomberg]

* Law schools in the Southeast closed their doors because their states were “unequipped for dealing with the roadways.” Send them up here, we’ve got school when there’s a foot of snow. [National Law Journal]

* A recent grad of a “good school” wanted to know how to get a job, so she asked an advice columnist. Here are five of the suggested jobs she probably already applied to and was rejected from. [Fortune]

* The third time’s apparently the charm in Italy: Amanda Knox was convicted of murder, again. Foxy Knoxy must be pissed that her case has turned into an extradition question on an international law exam. [CNN]

Blowing people up on Instagram is now gangster?

* Wal-Mart may recall loads of donkey meat from their stores. Not because they sold donkey meat — they intended to do that — but because there was fox meat mixed in. What does the Fox Say? Nothing, because it was ground into donkey meat. The end. [MSN Money] * Of course Colorado got rid of mile marker 420. But it’s not because they don’t like weed — it’s legal there, after all — check out the real reason. [Lowering the Bar] * Judges are reading briefs on iPads now? Here’s how you write a brief for a judge who has an app for “law.” [Columbia Business Law Review] * A listing of this lawyer’s previous representations. In the words of our tipster: “Don’t know what’s worse: Courtney Love or the Gambino crime family.” [Andrew Mancilla, Esq.] * The Ninth Circuit gave the go-ahead for about 60,000 tech workers to sue Google, Apple, and other companies for artificially driving down wages by agreeing not to poach each others’ employees. Hey, give these folks some love, not every one of them is going to go start a new video game company. [Reuters] * A lot of Cuban-American families in Miami blow a lot of money on quinceañeras. Here’s a way to recoup some funds: throw a completely innocent party and wait for the cops to come by and commit police brutality. This guy netted $90,000 that way. [Miami New Times]

Is Ecstasy a performance-enhancing drug? The Big Ten thinks so, because the Big Ten is stupid.

* A Supreme Court whose members are still afraid of using email will most likely have the final say on the NSA case, one of the biggest technology and privacy rulings in ages. Well, that’s comforting. [Talking Points Memo]

* Pittsburgh firm Buchanan Ingersoll & Rooney is reportedly in merger talks with Tampa firm Fowler White Boggs. Boy, a merger between two firms from lackluster cities sure sounds promising. [Daily Business Review]

* Law professors are completely outraged by the ABA’s proposal to cut tenure from its law school accreditation requirements. Quick, somebody write a law review article no one will read about it! [National Law Journal]

* Struggling to find a topic for your law school personal statement? You should ask someone who knows next to nothing about you and your life for advice. [Law Admissions Lowdown / U.S. News & World Report]

* Michael E. Schmidt, the lawyer killed in a police firefight, had some interesting things in his apartment, including a “green leafy substance,” a “white powdery substance,” and lots of pills. [Dallas Morning News]

* Kai the Hatchet-Wielding Hitchhiker pleaded not guilty in the beating death of a New Jersey lawyer. [New Jersey Star-Ledger]

* Judge Edmond E. Chang tossed Chicago’s gun sale ban as unconstitutional. [Fox News]

* Refusing to take a hint, Paul Clement is suing over the Affordable Care Act again. [The Blog of the Legal Times]

* Nixon Peabody is trying to stand out from the Biglaw crowd. Maybe it’s time for another theme song. [Washington Post]

* J.P. Morgan is close to a deal in the Madoff affair. Rumors place it at $2 billion or basically a week’s worth of revenue. [DealBook / New York Times]

* After getting busted for cocaine possession, GOP Rep. Trey Radel has hired Rob Walker of Wiley Rein to advise him on the looming House investigation. Only in Washington would you have an investigation into something after the guy already pleaded guilty. [Politico]

* Are you ready for your retirement? The answer is probably, no. [ABA Journal]

* You can go to jail for possession, but if you actively aid and abet drug cartels, you can walk away with a fine worth 5 weeks of your income. It also helps if instead of “poor” you’re a bank. Hooray for “Too Big To Hold Accountable For Anything!!! [Rolling Stone] * Disney has gotten fed up with “mockbusters,” films that jack the studio’s logo to confuse people into buying a different DVD. Now if you’ll excuse me, I’ve been itching to check out this new flick September: Osage County. [Jezebel] * Dahlia Lithwick explains that too many schools feel the cure for the trauma of school shootings is… creating more trauma. [Slate] * Chief Judge Theodore McKee of the Third Circuit rules that the government can detain you for carrying Arabic flashcards. This doesn’t even make racist profiling sense: “bad guys” would already know how to speak Arabic, right? [The Raw Story] * Defendants need to understand that getting an acquittal requires them to expend some personal effort, too. [Katz Justice]

* Kansas Law School has been fined and censured by the ABA for recruiting violations surrounding Andrew Wiggins. Wait, no, I got that wrong. KU Law started an LL.M. program without asking, which I’m sure they did only because Wiggins is from Canada. [Topeka Capital-Journal]

* The proposed merger between Patton Boggs and Locke Lord has been called off. Fingers crossed that Bendini Lambert is the next target for Locke Lord. [Am Law Daily]

* Mayor Bloomberg swears at his last set of judges. I mean swears “in.” Man, who gets up this early? [NYC.gov]

* President Obama commutes the sentences of eight inmates convicted of crack-cocaine offenses. [New York Times]

* New Mexico is Breaking Gay. [Bloomberg]

* Did EA know Battlefield 4 would kind of suck before they released it? [Techspot]

* So evidently R. Kelly isn’t “trapped” in the closet, so much as he’s hiding there waiting for your daughter to come home. [The Root]

* Here’s your homework for today: everybody has to go find a dispirited Duck Dynasty fan and patiently explain to him or her the difference between a government infringement on free speech and a network momentarily suspending a bigot. You’re not allowed to punch the fans, you can only use words, and if necessary, hand gestures. [Huffington Post]

* An inside look at the jury deliberations in the recent insider trading trial of Michael Steinberg of SAC Capital. [New York Times]

* An NSA review panel thinks the Chief Justice of the United States shouldn’t be the only one appointing judges to the FISA Court. We imagine John Roberts is pulling a Stuart Smalley. Don’t worry, you’re good enough. [Blog of Legal Times]

* Sadly, Amy Schulman, one of America’s most influential lawyers and best-paid general counsel, is out at Pfizer. After leading the charge against outside counsel’s hourly billing, we doubt she’ll head back to DLA Piper. [Corporate Counsel]

* Scott Bloch, former head of the Office of Special Counsel in the GWB administration, allegedly hated gay staffers so much he shipped them to Detroit. That settles it: he really hated them. [Blog of Legal Times]

* Sen. Elizabeth Warren proposed a bill that would ban all private employers — except the government — from running credit checks on new hires. Let’s go rack up some credit card debt! [National Law Journal]

* Law schools are facing enrollment problems, but Boalt Hall and Santa Clara Law saw the size of their entering classes rise. Flooding the entry-level job market continues to be celebrated. [The Recorder]

* “Yes — I do share nose candy with these girls. For free. For my personal use, OK?” Pro se litigants say the darndest things. Good thing this guy got an attorney before things got worse. [Albany Times Union]

Alex Rodriguez tries his version of the human emotion "anger."

* So we’ve had some technical difficulties this morning. Sorry all. So let’s kick off this abbreviated morning docket with news that Robert Dell will retire from Latham & Watkins at the end of 2014 after helming the firm for 20 years. [The Am Law Daily]

* Dwayne Bowe was arrested for alleged marijuana possession. He’s still going to start on Sunday though in case you were relying on his almost unnoticeable fantasy football impact this year. Remember when I didn’t understand the “Weeden Wayne Bowe” joke. Good times! [Kansas City Star]

* Whitey Bulger considers his trial a sham. He’ll be sentenced this morning. [LA Times]

* Former NBCUniversal General Counsel Lawrence Tu was named top lawyer at CBS. Congrats on “pulling a Letterman.” [Deadline]

* Sean Coffey is joining Kramer Levin. He previously headed up a litigation financing company. So when David asked if litigation finance was the hot new trend, apparently the answer is “no.” [New York Times / Dealbook]

* Tim Tebow’s trademark will become invalid if “Tebowing” is not used in commerce. That might suck for him, but right about now Tim Tebow should be more concerned about whether “Tim Tebow” is going to be used in commerce. [The Official Review] * Law school groups take to Facebook to advertise a panel on […]

* “What about devil worshippers?” Justice Scalia may think Satan’s gotten “wilier,” but that doesn’t mean his supporters don’t deserve religious representation in their public meetings. [WSJ Law Blog]

* Speaker of the House John Boehner says that if the Employment Non-Discrimination Act passes, tons of lawsuits will be filed — except that hasn’t happened in states with similar laws. Oopsie… [Reuters]

* Judge Shira Scheindlin isn’t going to just sit there and allow herself to be kicked off the stop and frisk case. In a rare move, she asked the Second Circuit to reverse its ruling and reinstate her. Go girl! [Reuters]

* Quinn Emanuel is welcoming a frequent firm-hopper (from Sidley to Clifford Chance to Cleary Gottlieb) into its ranks in D.C. to join Weil defectors Mike Lyle and Eric Lyttle. Best of luck! [Am Law Daily]

* Gibson Dunn scooped up Scott Hammond, a longtime leaders of the Department of Justice’s Antitrust Division. Query just how large the dangling carrot at the end of the firm’s stick was. [Blog of Legal Times]

* Till death or criminal charges do we part: troubled lawyer Kent Easter claims he didn’t have the backbone to stand up to his wife. He blames the entire drug-planting scandal on her. [L.A. Now / Los Angeles Times]

* “Some discrimination’s okay. It’s only certain kinds that aren’t good.” We’ve got a feeling we know which side the Supreme Court will come out on when it comes to the Mount Holly Gardens case in New Jersey, so fare thee well, Fair Housing Act. [MSNBC]

* Hallelujah! After last month’s miraculous news of this troubled firm finding a savior in Cooley LLP, the Left-Behinders of the Dow Lohnes partnership ranks are counting their blessings as they slowly but surely find new homes elsewhere. [Am Law Daily]

* After a political process that’s lasted for ages, now all that’s needed is the governor’s signature, and then Illinois will become the 15th state to officially have legalized same-sex marriage. Hooray! [New York Times]

* Lawyers for accused Boston Marathon bomber Dzhokhar Tsarnaev are annoyed that access to their client has been limited by jailhouse rules. A judge will slap down their motion next week. [National Law Journal]

* Bring it on: To keep things “simple,” prosecutors have dropped two felony charges against Kent Easter, the lawyer who allegedly planted drugs on a PTA volunteer at his son’s school. [Navelgazing / OC Weekly]

* What does SAC Capital’s $1.2 billion settlement with the government mean for the hedge fund industry? [DealBook / New York Times]

* Judge Richard Posner is the latest judge to have admitted to making a possible error (which he later endlessly recanted), but hey, if he was wrong, at least he was wrong in a “responsible, informed, and fair-minded way.” [National Law Journal]

* After being unceremoniously tossed off New York’s stop and frisk case by the Second Circuit for her supposed “partiality,” Judge Shira Scheindlin has been replaced by Judge Analisa Torres. Best of luck — you might need it. [New York Law Journal]

* Will Judge Scheindlin’s removal have a chilling effect on judicial speech? Lat thinks it would cause judges to “hide underneath their robes” even more than they already do. [Room for Debate / New York Times]

* The Biglaw gay gross-up marches on: it’s funny that the most conservative industry is outpacing others in terms of progressive benefits for LGBT employees and families. [Capital Business / Washington Post]

* “The U.S. is facing a paradox surrounding access to justice,” says ABA President James Silkenat, who is trying to kill two birds with one stone by pairing unemployed lawyers with poor clients. [Am Law Daily]

* Bernie Goetz (aka the New York subway vigilante) was arrested on pot charges after allegedly offering to get an undercover cop high. We’ve got a feeling his new nickname will be “Burnie.” [New York Daily News]

* Let’s get ready to rumble! Senate Democrats are threatening to go “nuclear” on existing filibuster rules if Senate Republicans decide to band together to block Patricia Millett’s nomination to the D.C. Circuit. [New York Times]

* AMR Corp. and US Airways are reportedly trying to broker a deal with the Department of Justice that would allow the airlines’ merger to go through. And this is the room full of people who care. [Wall Street Journal (sub. req.)]

* Proskauer Rose and the zombie corpse of Dewey & LeBoeuf received a Halloween treat from Judge Martin Glenn in the MF Global case. The firms will each be receiving a combined $9 million for their work. [Am Law Daily]

* Twitter is facing a $125 million fraud suit filed by two financial firms claiming that the social media giant had them organize a private sale of shares and then canceled it. #OhShiat #LawyerUp [Businessweek]

* Jill Bjorkholm Easter, the lawyer accused of planting drugs on a PTA volunteer at her son’s school, has pleaded guilty to false imprisonment. Her hubby’s trial is next week. [L.A. Now / Los Angeles Times]

* She’s got the right to remain topless: Holly Van Voast, the photographer famous for roaming the streets of New York with breasts bared, settled a lawsuit against the city for $40,000. [New York Daily News]

* “Ed,” the anonymous editor of the defunct Blawg Review site, RIP. [Trial Warrior Blog; Simple Justice]

* Parties in the greenhouse gas cases before SCOTUS have agreed to trim the number and length of their briefs to reduce the number of times “go f@ck yourself and die” is written. [Blog of Legal Times]

* The latest patent reform bill up for debate promises that it will put an end to the trolls by forcing them to do more work before filing suit. If only it were that easy to keep the trolls at bay. [National Law Journal]

* Do the hustle, and blame it on Becca! A jury has found that Bank of America is liable for selling defective mortgages, and the potential penalty could be up to $848 million. [DealBook / New York Times]

* Since the law was puff, puff, passed, lawyers in Washington State have politely asked their Supreme Court if and when they’ll allowed to smoke weed and represent clients that sell it. [Corporate Counsel]

* Class certification in the Alaburda v. TJSL lawsuit over allegedly deceptive employment statistics has officially been denied. We guess that all good things must come to an anticlimactic end. [ABA Journal]

* Another law school gets it: the U. of St. Thomas will its freeze tuition at the low, low price of $36,843, allowing students to pay a flat fee for all three years of education. [Campus Confidential / Star Tribune]

* If you’d like to ace your law school interviews (which apparently are a thing these days), it helps if your personality doesn’t inspire ritualistic seppuku. [Law Admissions Lowdown / U.S. News & World Report]

* Michael Skakel, the Kennedy cousin convicted of killing, was granted a new trial due to ineffective assistance of counsel. Getting away with murder? Aww, welcome to the family, Mike! [Washington Post]

* Law firm Halloween party advice. I disagree with some of this — my “Sexy John Marshall” costume was always a hit. [Greedy Associates / FindLaw] * The Supreme Court is expected to review a 10th Circuit decision holding that corporations are people and can exercise religious rights. Hopefully the Supreme Court stops this madness before my cable company has the right to bear arms. [Constitutional Accountability Center] * Governor Chris Christie has dropped his appeal of the New Jersey court decision authorizing same-sex marriage. He finally worked out that his own homophobia wasn’t worth being on the wrong side of 61 percent of Jersey voters. [Politico] * Let’s go get some Molly! [Law and More] * California is tightening up its Workers’ Comp rules for former professional athletes. From now on, injured ex-jocks need to prove a more significant tie to the state to collect compensation. This presents a problem for a lot of former football players who now have to admit they played for the Raiders. [The Legal Blitz] * Judge Smith of the New York Court of Appeals gets a scathing open letter. It’s fun when lawyers go “Flame On!” toward judges they might eventually be in front of. [New York Personal Injury Law Blog] * Governor Rick Snyder is asking a judge to drop her request to see unredacted copies of internal emails about the search for the Detroit emergency manager. Because nothing seemed sketchy about employing a law that had been specifically repealed by Michigan voters to overturn the democratically elected leadership of a major metropolis to install a partner from a firm that just so happens to get chosen as bankruptcy counsel, earning a ton of fees from the whole affair. Nothing at all. [Detroit News] * Guy sues Apple because he hates iOS 7. Not the dumbest suit ever brought against Apple. [BGR] * Entertainment lawyer Harry M. Brittenham moonlights as the author of graphic novels. A lawyer writing comic books may sound like a guy living in his mom’s basement, but he’s actually married to Heather Thomas from The Fall Guy. [New York Times] * Not everyone thinks law reviews are awful. [The Volokh Conspiracy]