Jury Duty
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American Bar Association / ABA, Anthony Kennedy, Bankruptcy, Biglaw, Dewey & LeBoeuf, Jury Duty, Law Schools, Layoffs, Morning Docket, Murder, Real Estate, SCOTUS, Supreme Court
Morning Docket: 06.13.14
* The SCOTUS decision in the Pom Wonderful case could have serious repercussions in terms of deceptive labeling litigation under the Lanham Act. Even Justice Kennedy was misled! [Huffington Post]
* Dewey know when to WARN people? This failed firm apparently didn’t, and now it has to pay a $4.5 million class-action settlement to the employees it laid off without adequate notice. [WSJ Law Blog]
* After getting bumped out of the Am Law 100 after a 17-year run, Shook Hardy & Bacon is letting go of three floors of office space it “no longer needs.” Secretaries Paper takes up a lot of room! [Am Law Daily]
* Minutes after this career criminal was released from jail due to his accidental acquittal, he was stabbed to death with a steak knife. But for the jury’s crazy mistake, he would still be alive. Yikes. [Fresno Bee]
* LMU’s Duncan Law, perhaps better known as the little law school that couldn’t, is still trying to get ABA accreditation. At least this time they’ll be able to use law schools’ national decline as a scapegoat. [WBIR]
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Bankruptcy, Fashion, Federal Judges, Jury Duty, Law Schools, Minority Issues, Morning Docket, Sports, Video games
Morning Docket: 06.10.14
* Hmm, somebody didn’t review those documents quickly enough: the City of Detroit’s bankruptcy trial has been delayed for about a month’s time by Judge Steven Rhodes because the parties needed additional time to get their acts together. [Bloomberg]
* The NCAA may have lost the battle in the Keller EA Sports video games case with its $20 million settlement offer, but it’s clearly out for blood to win the war in the O’Bannon case with its tough cross-examination tactics for the lead plaintiff. [USA Today]
* GW Law, a school that recently increased its class size by 22 percent and allowed its average LSAT score to slip by two points, yoinked its new dean right out from under Wake Forest’s nose. [GW Hatchet]
* The legal profession isn’t exactly diverse, and law schools want to change that — the more pictures of “diverse” students they can display on their websites, the better. [Law Admissions Lowdown / U.S. News]
* Who really cares what prospective jurors wear when they show up for jury duty? The lawyers arguing that being turned away for wearing sneakers affected their clients’ rights in a case, that’s who. [WSJ Law Blog]
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Celebrities, Jury Duty, Madonna
Madonna Got Out Of Jury Duty -- Because She's Madonna
Madonna bails out on jury duty and leaves her fans in the dust to serve their civic duty with hangovers.
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1st Circuit, American Bar Association / ABA, Asians, Bankruptcy, Biglaw, California, Judicial Nominations, Jury Duty, Law Professors, Malpractice, Morning Docket, Politics, S.D.N.Y., Technology, Trials
Morning Docket: 05.06.14
* U.S. Attorney Preet Bharara wants to know more about why Governor Andrew Cuomo shut down an anticorruption commission. [New York Times]
* The ABA weighs in on the “unfinished business” controversy affecting bankrupt law firms, their lawyers, and their clients. [WSJ Law Blog]
* Better late than never: students and professors at UC Davis Law are pushing for the posthumous admission to the California bar of Hong Yeng Chang, who was denied a law license in 1890 solely because of his Chinese heritage. [Associated Press; South China Morning Post]
* Speaking of late, a robber sent to prison 13 years late because of a clerical error just got released. [ABA Journal]
* Drones could claim another victim: the First Circuit nomination of Harvard law professor David Barron. [How Appealing]
* Who still wants a landline phone? The jury foreman in the latest Apple-Samsung battle, who is sick and tired of cellphones after the month-long trial. [The Recorder (sub. req.)]
* Not such a Great Adventure: “Cadwalader To Pay $17M In Six Flags Malpractice Fight.” [Law360 (sub. req.)]
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Facebook, Jury Duty, Law Schools, Non-Sequiturs, Student Loans, United Kingdom / Great Britain
Non-Sequiturs: 04.17.14
* Cheerios is claiming that “Liking” them on Facebook constitutes a waiver of the right to sue. Let’s take this moment to encourage everyone to Like Above the Law on Facebook. [NY Times] * New study determines that the United States is an oligarchy instead of a democracy. You're telling me a government explicitly founded on the principle that only a handful of wealthy men should have a voice grew into an oligarchy? Quelle surprise! * Oh look, John Edwards is back. [Slate] * In the continuing saga of NYU’s allegedly shady spending, there are now reports that former NYU Law Dean and current NYU President John Sexton used school funds to convert two apartments into a duplex for his son. His son was married to an NYU Law employee and as I’ve said before, a school located in housing-scarce Manhattan should be able to do something to house professors, but as they say, “the optics” aren’t good. [Chronicle of Higher Education] * Musings on what it’s like to clerk in the midst of “flyover country” (presumably like my early childhood home of Des Moines). It makes a valiant effort to redeem itself at the end, but this article is exactly why most parts of the country think New Yorkers are elitist dicks. Which, we kind of are, but you don’t want to broadcast that. [Ramblings on Appeal] * The government is profiting handsomely from law students. Is that really a bad thing? [Law & Economics Prof Blog] * A D.C. law professor is now a movie star. [Washington City Paper] * The judge in the New Orleans Affordable Housing case may know the real identity of one of the anonymous commenters in the case. And if one of the anonymous trolls was a federal prosecutor poisoning the well in the case — like everyone suspects — it could aid the defense. [Times-Picayune] * For those of you across the pond, there’s a one-day event for lawyers on the business case for Corporate Social Responsibility. It’s in England because American companies have already passed on the idea of corporate responsibility. [International Law Society] -
Jury Duty, Litigators, Trials
Qui Tam: Jury's Out
Is jury trial "the grand bulwark of our liberties" -- or just a big disaster? -
American Bar Association / ABA, Contempt, In-House Counsel, Job Searches, Jury Duty, Law Schools, Morning Docket, Sports, State Judges
Morning Docket: 04.07.14
* According to the Bureau of Labor Statistics, the legal sector added 2,300 jobs in 2014. Our sincere condolences go out to all those who are still “too overqualified but too under-experienced,” all at the same time, to get hired. [Am Law Daily]
* This lawyer protested jury duty by emailing the judge to say she’d “blame the plaintiff” for making her work nights and weekends for her client, but she can only blame herself for having to spend the night in jail. Oopsie! [Daily Report (reg. req.)]
* “Would it be great if all unpaid internships paid really well? Sure. It would also be great if my dog made breakfast for me every morning, but I am not going to file a lawsuit over it.” Yep. [Los Angeles Times]
* The law school transparency movement has come quite far since its inception, but there’s a lot of room for improvement. Encourage your school to hurry up and “publish what it has at its fingertips.” [Law.com]
* UVA Law held its Softball Invitational this weekend. A Duke Law dude emailed us to say his school sucks at basketball, but it’s awesome at law school softball. Sweet accomplishment, brah. [Newsplex]
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Election Law, Gay, Jury Duty, Marijuana, Non-Sequiturs, Securities and Exchange Commission, Supreme Court
Non-Sequiturs: 04.04.14
* DEA Administrator decides to up the ante on the stupidest argument against marijuana legalization ever: it’s harmful to dogs. The DEA’s plan to ban chocolate is still in draft. [The Volokh Conspiracy / Washington Post] * Everyone’s up to date on the Florida lawyer and right-wing congressional candidate with the vampiric cosplay rape fantasies, right? Okay good. [Gawker] * Jurors say police used excessive force but that the beating didn’t injure the plaintiff. In other news, Florida has a senility problem. [The Florida Times-Union] * Did anybody notice that Chief Justice Roberts -- the author of Shelby County -- opened McCutcheon by labeling the right to participate in electing leaders as fundamental with absolutely no irony. [Reuters] * Anti-gay job discrimination may already be illegal. [Slate] * The bad economy pits criminal defense lawyers against each other. They shouldn’t do that. [Katz Justice] * The SEC doesn’t have to abide by the Brady rule and Mark Cuban’s not happy about it. [Wall Street Journal] - Sponsored
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Jury Duty, Law Professors, Law Schools, Legal Ethics, Non-Sequiturs, Rudeness, Ruth Bader Ginsburg, Social Media, Social Networking Websites, Women's Issues
Non-Sequiturs: 03.21.14
* Justice Ginsburg was a hottie back in the day (as well as a cheerleader, aka a “Twirler”). [Josh Blackman's Blog] * “When a Juror Calls You a Motherf*cker” (or, how not to get out of jury duty). [New York Personal Injury Law Blog] * Professor Edward Morrison returns to Columbia Law, after a very short stint at U. Chicago — maybe he missed his fabulous Lawyerly Lair in Manhattan? [Columbia Law School] * Speaking of CLS faculty members with multimillion-dollar townhouses, congratulations to Sarah Cleveland on her nomination to serve as an independent expert on the Human Rights Committee. [Columbia Law School] * After getting a cease-and-desist letter, this Maine bakery renamed the controversial treat “C&D” — well played, Little Bigs Bakery, well played. [WMTV.com] * In the wake of the latest “no cleavage” memo, which made the pages of the New York Daily News, Amanda Hess conducts a comprehensive survey of this odious genre. [Slate] * Social media isn’t a panacea, but it can be important and useful, and lawyers should use it responsibly — so check out these new Social Media Ethics Guidelines for Attorneys. [New York State Bar Association] -
Alan Dershowitz, Cars, Conferences / Symposia, Drugs, Education / Schools, Intellectual Property, Jury Duty, Non-Sequiturs, Old People, Patents, Suicide, Videos
Non-Sequiturs: 03.20.14
* A Minnesota court ruled that it is not a crime to encourage people to commit suicide. So… keep commenting assholes, just know that you’ll feel really bad if I do it. [Gawker] * I might be in the market for a used car, and I’m hoping to get a really good deal on one of these “recalled” GMs. I hope the DOJ doesn’t screw up my plans. [Reuters Legal] * Speaking of cars, Alan Dershowitz calls for vigorous prosecution of reckless drivers. I call for vigorous prosecution of any box-blocking suburbanite who drives around Manhattan on a Saturday like they’re cruising to the country fair. [ABA Journal] * Alabama thinks that people over 70 should be excused from jury duty. YES, they deserve to be excused and I hope they burn in Hell! [WSJ Law Blog] * Narc is the new tattletale. [Simple Justice] * Are you an IP lawyer, especially a patent litigator? Here’s a symposium you should consider attending (featuring ATL columnist Gaston Kroub). [Markman Advisors] * Speaking of conferences, who wants to hang out with Lat in Las Vegas? Read on for details (plus video)…. Lat will be speaking next month at Avvo’s big Lawyernomics conference in Vegas. Here’s the agenda, here’s the registration from, and here’s Lat’s speaker spotlight video: -
Animal Law, Antonin Scalia, Bernie Madoff, Breasts, International Law, Jury Duty, Non-Sequiturs, SCOTUS, Social Media, Social Networking Websites, Supreme Court, Twittering
Non-Sequiturs: 03.19.14
* I include this line not to highlight the horribleness of zoos, but because I’m doing NS today and this contains a fun anecdote about walrus masturbation. [Cracked] * Meanwhile, on Redline, I’m like, doing stuff. [ATL: Redline] * “I really want to go to law school to study international law and be a part of solving problems like what’s going on in Crimea right now.” — Dumb idiot who will wish he read Above the Law before he went to law school. [Radio Free Europe] * Student gets punished for sending a tweet from home. Should it really matter where you are sitting when you hit the button on the tweet calling your principal a “pussy ass bitch”? [It-Lex] * I think the jurors on the Bernie Madoff co-conspirator case might be running a Ponzi scheme. [Dealbreaker] * Everyone is overwhelmed, apparently. [Going Concern] * Scalia apparently comes up with his s**t while dozing off to sleep. So, literally now, Scalia’s dreams are the stuff of my nightmares. [Military.com] -
Constitutional Law, Election Law, Jury Duty, Movies, Non-Sequiturs, Religion, Supreme Court, Technology
Non-Sequiturs: 03.03.14
* What’s a good excuse for getting out of jury duty? Apparently not “having a heart attack RIGHT NOW!” [Lowering the Bar] * The hits from the CATO amicus brief keep on coming. They commit a footnote to mocking Chief Justice Roberts. [Election Law Blog] * The Attractive Convict is suing over the use of her mugshot in banner ads. Your redemption is coming, Scumbag Steve! [IT-Lex] * David Healey, formerly of Weil Gotshal and currently of Fish & Richardson, is filming a movie based on his earlier book. And it stars Sean Young! That’ll work well. [Times of Sicily] * Does a public-school donor’s request to thank God in an inscription constitute an Establishment Clause violation? [Chronicle of Higher Education] * Supreme Court will hear the case of the NC Dental Board’s efforts to limit the teeth-whitening industry to dentists. Will this ruling spell trouble for state bar associations applying a death grip to all legal services? [WRAL] -
Celebrities, Contracts, Entertainment Law, Jury Duty, Quote of the Day, Television, Trials
Former 'Friends' Star Acts Like Dumb Blonde On The Stand, Still Has To Pay Millions In Damages
Lisa Kudrow tries acting like Phoebe Buffay on the stand, but it doesn't get her very far.
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Crime, Education / Schools, Election Law, Jury Duty, Non-Sequiturs, Police, SCOTUS, Sports, Supreme Court
Non-Sequiturs: 02.21.14
* The Ed O’Bannon suit against the NCAA will proceed to trial in June barring settlement. Football writer/genius Spencer Hall put it best when he described the hearing as “a judge looks at amateurism and says ‘this is bulls**t’ in legalese.” [Sports Illustrated] * McCutcheon will usher in even more campaign finance excess, but could alleviate gridlock. Plutocracies are efficient! [Election Law Blog] * Hold the phone! Coerced confessions aren’t admissible? Next thing you’ll tell us is waterboarding is illegal. Thanks Obama. [New York Law Journal] * Juror who couldn’t stop using Facebook didn’t cause a mistrial because he didn’t post any details about the case. In other news, he really needs a goat in FarmVille you guys, so if anyone can hook him up, that’d be great. (Alternative heading for this one: “11 Angry Men, 1 ‘Likes This’”) [IT-Lex] * Disbarred lawyer mistakenly allowed to serve as a judge. But only for about 16 years, so it’s all cool. [Washington City Paper] * “The first thing we do, let’s kill all the [Baby Boomer] lawyers.” [Law and More] * A California lawsuit argues that pro-teacher policies in the state are hurting education. The defendants point to the fact that California’s educational administration and funding in the state is best described as a “sh*tshow.” Experts are fighting it out with some novel metrics. [The Expert Institute] * Elie talks about the new ad for cameras in the Supreme Court and the EPA's power to regulate greenhouse gases on Legalese It! with Mike Sacks. Video embedded below... [Huffington Post Live] -
Antonin Scalia, Barack Obama, D.C. Circuit, FCC, Food, Jury Duty, Morning Docket, Movies, Murder, SCOTUS, Supreme Court, Trials
Morning Docket: 02.20.14
* Justice Scalia apparently has an ulterior motive for his hatred of deep-dish pizza: “He’s just trying to undermine Barack Obama because he’s a Chicago guy.” God, can’t the guy just like New York style pizza better? Come on. [WSJ Law Blog (sub. req.)]
* Now that the Federal Communication Commission’s net neutrality rules have been smacked down by the D.C. Circuit, the agency is going to start from scratch and come up with some new ones. Yeah, good luck with that. [National Law Journal]
* “Roll your window up, ignore the taunting, put your car in reverse, move a parking spot over.” These are some of the ways you can avoid killing black teenagers over loud music, says a Michael Dunn juror. [CNN]
* The toupee gave it away: A lawyer who used to work as an i-banker at Stratton Oakmont is suing for defamation over a character he claims was modeled after him in the “Wolf of Wall Street.” [ABC News]
* The lawsuit filed against Nick Saban’s daughter by her sorority sister was tossed under Alabama’s “stand your ground” rule over her objections that she was kind of like a defenseless receiver. [Associated Press]
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Contempt, Jury Duty, Quote of the Day
Careful With That Jury Form
FYI, you should steer clear of profanity and racial slurs when filling out your jury questionnaire. -
Attorney Misconduct, Jury Duty, Legal Ethics, Texas, Trials
That's One Way To Pick A Jury. Maybe An Unethical One, But It Is One Way.
And what's worse, it sounds like the partner threw the associate under the bus on this one. -
Attorney Misconduct, Jury Duty, Legal Ethics, Quote of the Day
Words Jurors Are Too Dumb To Hear In Public Include 'Guilty,' 'Not Guilty,' And 'Innocent'
Why did this lawyer have to spend time in jail for saying the word 'guilty'? -
Clerkships, Harvard, Hedge Funds / Private Equity, Insider Trading, Jury Duty, S.D.N.Y., Trials, U.S. Attorneys Offices, Wall Street, White-Collar Crime
The Mathew Martoma Case, By The Numbers
Some fun facts about the just-concluded trial of Mathew Martoma. -
Animal Law, Crime, Dubious Defenses, Jury Duty, Oral Sex / Blow Jobs, Trials, United Kingdom / Great Britain
Cow Rejects Man’s Sexual Advances. What Happens Next... Is the Jury Laughs At Him.
Jury reveling in the hilarious testimony in an attempted bestiality case.