Law Professor Hiring

* Well, this is one way to deal with the Free the Nipple campaign: ban sideboob and underboob. And while you’re at it, legalize public boners because consistency is hard. Heh. [Vice]

* The Pope’s homelessness chops are on point. [What About Paris?]

* This is the absolute best way to troll prestige whores. [Daily Lawyer Tips]

* Is this the best recommendation letter ever? [Lawyers, Guns & Money]

* This is how bigamy cases go down in the world of Facebook. [Legal Juice]

* Using forensic evidence to document human rights abuses. [Pacific Standard]

* What’s going on with Janet Yellen? [Dealbreaker]

* Interesting to legal nerds (and maybe others). The Justice Department’s very influential Office of Legal Counsel (OLC) — the division that produced the torture memos, among other things — cranks out a lot of law professors. [Yale Journal on Regulation]

* Southern California Institute of Law is suing the state bar over requirements schools must maintain a 40 percent bar passage rate over 5 years. [Los Angeles Times]

* Have dreams of running away from the practice of law into the welcoming embrace of academia? Not so fast. The rate of new law professor jobs has dropped 55 percent. [National Law Journal]

* FBI agents cannot be sued for monetary damages in their personal capacity for keeping people on the “No Fly List” as a coercive measure in anti-terrorism investigations, says SDNY Judge Ronnie Abrams. [New York Law Journal]

* Find out who are the scariest federal prosecutors according to Steptoe & Johnson partner Reid Weingarten. [Litigation Daily]

* You should still say “sorry” even when you’re at work. [Corporate Counsel]

* A fun way to mix college football fandom with your attorney advertising. [ABA Journal]

* Carey Gabay, a lawyer for Empire State Development Corp., and who formerly held positions as assistant counsel to Governor Andrew Cuomo and at Jones Day and at Schulte Roth & Zabel, was shot in the head yesterday before the West Indian American Day Parade in Brooklyn. He is in critical condition. [New York Post]

I hope you didn't want to be a law professor, because people have stopped hiring them too.

* The right to choose… to drive out of state? SCOTUS rejected an application to block Texas from enforcing a law requiring abortion doctors to have privileges at nearby hospitals. [New York Times]

* Patton Boggs should prepare for the day when Locke Lord is too busy washing its hair to go on a date. The would-be merger is just one of many “interesting opportunities” the firm is considering. [Am Law Daily]

* In case you were wondering about the type of people who are accepted into Greenberg Traurig’s residency program, the recent law grad profiled in this article went to Nova Southeastern. [Sun Sentinel]

* Law firm merger mania, mid-size Midwest edition: Chi-Town law firm Shefsky & Froelich is the just latest in a very well-known group to be gobbled up by a much larger firm, only to have its name completely disappear. [Crain’s Chicago Business]

* When it comes to law faculty hiring, it doesn’t matter what color your skin is or what you’ve got between your legs, so long as your résumé is covered in Ivy and you’re dripping with prestige. [National Law Journal]

* Ave Maria School of Law is in need of a new dean. It seems the man who created the school’s “Advanced Critical Thinking Department” engaged in deep thought before deciding to call it quits. [Naples Daily News]

There must be a reason why law schools aren't hiring labor and employment law professors, but what is it?