Mr. Bar Exam

Staci here. It’s been a few months since we last spoke about our man Sam E. Goldberg’s travails with the New York bar exam. From working hard to hardly working, he brought us the blow-by-blow experience of a first-time test taker in graphic detail this past summer.

Well, the results finally came in last week, but we know that our readers have been dying to know whether Mr. Bar Exam passed the test, perhaps for the schadenfreude. What’s the likelihood that a dude who took a trip to Vegas in the middle of studying passed the test?

Hold on to your hats, because we’re about to find out….

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Elie here: It’s finally over. The horror, the exhilaration, the time spent in New Jersey.

Our man Sam is finished with the bar exam. How did it go? How drunk did he get afterwards?

Sam walks us through the experience — the blow-by-blow experience, from the car to the end…

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Staci here. The bar exam is right around the corner, and fear is starting to set in — fear of not being able to cram enough law into your head, fear of confusing necessary information, and the worst fear of all, the fear of failure.

But for all the Adderall addicts out there, these fears don’t seem to exist. Not sure about your mastery of a particular MBE topic? Just pop another pill and study for eight hours straight. Problem solved! (Note that we do not condone using study drugs to get ahead of the curve on the exam.)

If you’re not a chronic pill popper, not to worry, because Mr. Bar Exam has got some advice for you about the “brain foods” that you can eat to improve your memory and concentration….

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Staci here. Last weekend, hundreds of bar exam studiers crowded into the Javits Center to take BAR/BRI’s practice MBE for the New York bar exam. How did that turn out? Not so great, because apparently the average score was rather low. You can imagine how badly people are freaking out if their score was worse than the average.

And this might sound sick, but in addition to their practice MBE scores, some people are also worrying about their social lives, or lack thereof. But not to worry, because Mr. Bar Exam has got some sage advice for you on both fronts….

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Staci here. As a frequent bar exam studier, I can tell you that the routine gets really old, really quickly. A day in the life of your average bar exam studier goes something like this: Wake up. Class. Library. Study. Cry. Drink. Rinse. Repeat. It’s a terrible, terrible time in law school graduates’ lives, and unfortunately there’s not much that can be done to avoid the epic monotony.

But in the meantime, there are other important things to focus on, like the upcoming practice MBE. How can you balance your studies without freaking out? Let’s see what Mr. Bar Exam has to say….

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Elie here: We’re nearing the halfway point of bar exam study season. The pressure is stepping up. Suddenly getting killed on the practice questions isn’t as funny anymore.

Seems like an excellent time to blow off steam with bar exam “party girls,” as Mr. Bar Exam explains…

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Staci here. Do people who went to lower-ranked law schools have an edge on other bar examinees in terms of subject matter mastery? After all, lower-ranked law schools tend to have a much heavier focus on bar-related courses than you’ll find at HYS, CCN, or other top-ranked law schools.

For example, at most second-tier law schools, you’ll find that the majority of these courses are mandatory (no ifs, ands, or buts about it): Constitutional Law, Contracts, Criminal Law, Civil Procedure, Property, Torts, and Evidence.

See what Mr. Bar Exam has to say about this — plus catch a glimpse of a BAR/BRI professor playing a special little ditty on a banjo, just for the Above the Law audience….

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Staci here. A scene like this must have played out in the past few weeks at the law library while everyone was studying for the upcoming bar exam. Someone who is a repeat bar taker tries to explain a legal concept that you’re having trouble with, and everyone around you is looking at you like you’re insane for listening to him. Come on, that guy failed the bar exam. He obviously doesn’t have a clue…. or does he?

Should you give credence to a repeat bar examinee’s advice, or take it with a grain of salt? Can you really trust someone who’s failed the bar exam?

Mr. Bar Exam will give you his thoughts, and he may be sharing the screen with an attractive study partner….

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Staci here. When you finished law school, you probably thought you’d have some time to relax before bar exam hell started this summer, but you quickly found out just how wrong you were about that.

So instead of going to the bar and getting all wasteyfaced, you buckled down and studied hard for a few weeks. But you still felt deprived. You still felt like you needed to go out and get your partying ways out of your system. It was then that you had an epiphany — come hell or high water, you were going to take a weekend trip to Vegas to escape from your bar exam woes.

Now, this may sound incredibly stupid to some of our readers, and to be quite frank, it is. It’s about as stupid as choosing someone like me as your bar exam study partner. But Mr. Bar Exam didn’t care.

Let’s see the important lesson he learned in this week’s episode….

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Elie here. Did you know that New York-area law schools charge money for the use of their libraries during bar exam study time?

Did you know that people coming to New York to take the bar are willing to pay for the use of these libraries, thereby avoiding the homeless people masturbating at the New York Public Library?

Did you know that New York Law School, of all places, is probably offering the best library deal?

These are some of the things you’ll learn about in this week’s episode of Mr. Bar Exam….

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