Music

Non-Sequiturs: 08.20.12

By

* So now the judge accused of watching porn from a courthouse computer admits to watching porn on a courthouse computer. Let me just get this out of the way: if I’ve used your computer, it was probably to watch porn. [Chicago Sun-Times]

* Too soon for Aurora jokes? I think it’s weird that more people believe in waiting periods for zingers than for handguns. [Tax Prof Blog]

* Lance Armstrong’s suit against the U.S. Anti-Doping Agency was dismissed by U.S. District Judge Sam Sparks. How come the only athlete that seemed to get his day in court was Roger Clemens? [Bloomberg]

* Another kid is packing in his sports dreams to go to law school. Though, in fairness, one of the few things worse than the law graduate economy is probably the NHL economy. [North Dakota Inforum]

* I think Republican political candidates should know by now that they only bands they are allowed to like are country music bands. If they want to like non-country music, they should get the artist’s approval, in writing. Meanwhile, liberals are allowed like all kinds of music, even music performed by people who don’t know what they are talking about. [What About Clients?]

* Attorney and rape victim Shauna Prewitt has some facts about rape that apparently Todd Akin didn’t know. [xoJane]

12 Comments

Insane Clown… Plaintiffs? Juggalos Consider Suing the FBI

By

Father of Our Country, Juggalo Washington

What is a juggalo?
Let me think for a second
Oh, he gets butt-naked
And then he walks through the streets
Winking at the freaks
With a two-liter stuck in his butt-cheeks

– Insane Clown Posse

At the 1992 Republican National Convention, Pat Buchanan announced that America was in the midst of a culture war. In his view, this war was being waged between descendents of the 60′s counter-culture and those who sought to protect “traditional” values. In the field of law, this idea found a home in (who else?) Justice Antonin Scalia’s dissent in Romer v. Evans, in which he famously wrote that “[t]he Court has mistaken a Kulturkampf for a fit of spite.” Something about the original German sends a shiver down the spine, doesn’t it? Anyway, we can all surely agree that these two yahoos wouldn’t know a culture war if it slapped them in the face with a bottle of Faygo soda.

There’s a real culture war going on, ninjas. And it has nothing to do with gay marrying or abortions or the third rail of American politics, cockfighting. It has to do with the FBI’s insane decision to categorize Juggalos — i.e., fans of the Insane Clown Posse hip-hop duo — as a “loosely-organized hybrid gang.” It has to do with real persecution and honest-to-God discrimination against the Juggalo people.

Luckily for me and my fellow Juggalos, Insane Clown Posse doesn’t know the meaning of backing down. And that’s not a slam at all, it’s just a turn-of-phrase. They know the meaning. They just refuse to back down. Is what I’m saying….

double red triangle arrows Continue reading “Insane Clown… Plaintiffs? Juggalos Consider Suing the FBI”

16 Comments

Non-Sequiturs: 08.09.12

By

Meet your new cellmates.

* A few weeks back, we mentioned some legal lessons gleaned from Jay-Z’s 99 Problems. Turns out, you might not need law school to become a lawyer. Maybe all you need is a Spotify subscription and a good set of headphones. [FindLaw]

* Government security guard finds suspicious bag and stashes it under his desk, where it chills out for a couple of weeks. Oh yeah, I should probably mention — there was A BOMB in the bag. Nice work, Sherlock. [CNN]

* If you rat someone out, you might avoid prson. But in Illinois, if you end up in prison, don’t be surprised if you end up with a real rat as a cellmate. Maybe a roach too, if you get particularly unlucky. [WBEZ]

* Former Judge of the Day John Wulle, who yelled at a teenager in court and suggested the teen might be “stupid,” just lost his bid for reelection. I think the appropriate statement here is: Stupid is as stupid does. [The Columbian]

* I’m pretty sure everyone knows politicians are not exactly truthful all the time. But which politicians are the heavyweight “Liar, liar, pants on fire” champions? [Daily Dolt]

3 Comments

Rapping California Girl Giving You A Property Primer Before The Bar Exam

By

California bar, it's unforgettable, somebody pukes, most end on top.

As many of you already know, state bar exams start tomorrow. If you are taking the bar tomorrow, WHAT ARE YOU DOING READING ATL??

Just kidding. Relax. It’s gonna be what it’s gonna be.

To get you guys pumped up for the next two or three days, a reader sent us a clip of herself rapping property. If this Hastings student doesn’t make you psyched to take the bar, well, there’s probably never anybody in the history of ever who has been psyched about taking the California bar….

double red triangle arrows Continue reading “Rapping California Girl Giving You A Property Primer Before The Bar Exam”

38 Comments

Morning Docket: 07.13.12

By

* “I think this is destined to fail.” People are not happy with the proposed settlement plan for former Dewey partners, but who are they kidding? These people don’t exactly like to part with money — not even to hand out bonuses. [Am Law Daily (sub. req.)]

* Andrew Levander, a partner at Dechert LLP, is representing ex-Barclays chief executive Bob Diamond. Diamond hasn’t been charged with anything, but this white-collar defense lawyer’s apparently been on his side since 2010. [WSJ Law Blog]

* Money talks: lawyers and law firms are the top donors by industry to presidential campaign funds, with Kirkland & Ellis leading for Romney, and DLA Piper for Obama. [Capital Business Blog / Washington Post]

* Escándalo! Louis Freeh’s report revealed that PSU’s “seriously deficient” counsel billed a whopping 2.9 hours on an incident involving Jerry Sandusky’s locker room shower with a young boy. [Centre Daily Times]

* But here’s where the football chatter comes in (not that I know a lot about football): legal experts say Freeh threw an “incomplete” with this report, because it didn’t go far back enough in time. [New York Daily News]

* Sorry, lady, but you didn’t need to attend a Justin Bieber concert for his music to allegedly cause permanent damage to your ears to the tune of $9M. All you really needed to do was turn on the radio. [Chicago Tribune]

2 Comments

Courtney Love Litigation Potpourri

By

Courtney Love is many things to many people. Succubus, Golden Globe-nominated actress, rockstar in her own right, subject of several awesome post-grunge rock songs, and now serial defendant.

As we previously mentioned in Non-Sequiturs, Love is being sued by litany of her former associates. Her former legal consigliere says he was not properly paid, and now her former personal assistant says Love asked her to act illegally and hire a hacker.

What, what? Say it ain’t so, C. Love!

double red triangle arrows Continue reading “Courtney Love Litigation Potpourri”

12 Comments

Quote of the Day: I Got 99 Problems and the Fourth Amendment is One

By

If this Essay serves no other purpose, I hope it serves to debunk, for any readers who persist in believing it, the myth that locking your trunk will keep the cops from searching it. Based on the number of my students who arrived at law school believing that if you lock your trunk and glove compartment, the police will need a warrant to search them, I surmise that it’s even more widespread among the lay public. But it’s completely, 100% wrong.

– Professor Caleb Mason of Southwestern Law School, in a Saint Louis University Law Journal article that analyzes the legal issues in Jay-Z’s smash hip-hop hit, 99 Problems.

24 Comments

Quote of the Day: Starships Were Meant to Fly (Without Groping)

By

Nicki Minaj

Pretty sure I was just overtly fondled @ this check point. By a very old lady w/an accent. Word?

– Nicki Minaj, a pop/rap star, complaining on Twitter about a recent encounter with a TSA agent while en route to the Philippines for a concert during her summer tour.

19 Comments

Mr. Bar Exam: Bar Exam Is A Big Party, If You Don’t Need To Know The Answers

By

Elie here: We’re nearing the halfway point of bar exam study season. The pressure is stepping up. Suddenly getting killed on the practice questions isn’t as funny anymore.

Seems like an excellent time to blow off steam with bar exam “party girls,” as Mr. Bar Exam explains…

double red triangle arrows Continue reading “Mr. Bar Exam: Bar Exam Is A Big Party, If You Don’t Need To Know The Answers”

28 Comments

Summer Associate Stories: Summer Puts On A Show At The Apollo

By

This could have been one summer's tomb, but he turned it into his triumph.

The days of summer associates getting drunk and doing something incredibly stupid might be over. The kids are too terrified of not getting job offers — and they know that there is no 3L recruiting market to speak of. If they screw up their summer, they’re screwed, and so summer associates are playing things close to the vest.

But that doesn’t mean there aren’t great summer stories happening out there. When the spotlight is on you and you can’t screw up, the only option left is to succeed.

That’s how one summer associate approached things. On a summer outing to the historic Apollo Theater, the summer reluctantly found himself as the center of attention. So he did what you have to do in that situation — he killed it….

double red triangle arrows Continue reading “Summer Associate Stories: Summer Puts On A Show At The Apollo”

47 Comments
Page 6 of 131...2345678910...13