NFL

Where, exactly, do they use this in commerce?

* 50 Cent is suing Reed Smith for malpractice. As they say, “Get Rich Or Sue Your Lawyers.” [Law.com]

* The federal government lags in cybersecurity because all the talent is going to the private sector. [New York Law Journal]

* Nothing says, “politics as usual” better than the South Dakota legislature declaring an “emergency” to overturn an ethics law. [Huffington Post]

* D.C. Circuit blocks state attorneys general from coming to the defense of the CFPB. [National Law Journal]

* Kellyanne scolds America for not remembering the Bowling Green massacre. Admittedly it’s easy to forget, what with it never happening and all. [CNN]

* Trump plans to roll back the protections put in place after the financial crisis. Presumably next week he’ll take action to eliminate airbags because, “hey my car isn’t crashing right this second, why does anyone need these?” [Wall Street Journal]

* NFL TE turned Wiley Rein associate Colin Cloherty has a hard time picking who to root for in the Super Bowl. [The Am Law Daily]

* The NLRB’s general counsel issued a memo recognizing college football players as employees, because they fit every conceivable definition of an employee. So obviously politicians — of one party anyway — are demanding his resignation. [Law360]

* Punxsutawney Phil saw his shadow, and with the current Court make up, this is the last penumbra we’re going to see for awhile. [USA Today]

* Norton Rose Fulbright in merger talks with Chadbourne & Parke. [New York Law Journal]

* Chief Justice Roberts compared himself to an umpire. Judge Gorsuch compared himself to a replay booth official. The football analogy works, since Gorsuch is going to be one of those scab refs from the 2012 NFL lockout while Garland sits at home. [Law.com]

* Keeping with the football news, former NFL cheerleaders have filed a class action alleging a conspiracy to suppress their wages, which, if true, is easily the sixth or seventh most repulsive thing Roger Goodell does on a daily basis. [ABC News]

* In a letter to the state Supreme Court, 20 law school deans asked California to lower its draconian bar passage threshold. Because it’s ridiculous. [The Recorder]

* Trump is reportedly going to direct the Labor Department to delay implementation of the Fiduciary Rule, surprising no one. [Think Advisor]

* Here’s a roundup of Judge Gorsuch’s wittiest dissents. [Law360]

* You could say these lawyers made an epic screwup when they cribbed another complaint and failed to make even the most obvious changes, but I like to think they were just trying to prove the dangers of repeated concussions. [Law.com]

* Class action certified in PACER suit. If you want to read the order, I’m sure there’s a place online you can go to find it. [Law Sites]

* Sounds like Charlotte School of Law has some real issues. [The Atlantic]

* Trump hires Stefan C. Passantino of Dentons to handle ethics and compliance for the new administration. Because Dentons has done so well on this score lately. [Law360]

* For some reason, whistleblower lawyers feel pretty good about their practices for the next few years. [National Law Journal]

* Andrew Ceresney believes the SEC will remain aggressive in the new administration, proving that this whole alternative facts thing is spreading! [Law.com]

* Some student groups want a formal role in the process of hiring Harvard’s next dean including membership on the search committee. Don’t cross that line — a strong, vocal student body prepared to critique the school’s decisions actually requires staying out of the decisions themselves. [Harvard Crimson]

First rule of cover-up club: don't leave hundreds of witnesses.

* On the importance of having your criminal clients dressed for court, not for jail. [Katz Justice]

* An eight-justice Supreme Court has inspired some fanfic! No, there aren’t any group sex scenes, it isn’t that kind of fanfic. [Medium]

* A group of law professors have now joined Massholes in supporting Tom Brady’s Hail Mary for a Second Circuit rehearing. [Profootball Talk]

* We need to protect the free speech rights of teachers too. [Bloomberg View]

* A Trump presidency will threaten the rule of law, at least according to a bunch of libertarian legal scholars. [New York Times]

* Florida banned Medicaid patients from using Planned Parenthood, and now PP is fighting back in court. [Slate]

* There seems to be more legal bad news for Uber. [Law and More]

* Ammon and Ryan Bundy still don’t think the rules apply to them, even when they are in jail. [Huffington Post]

Consider this an early salvo in the battle over NFL concussions.

* An odd order? Perhaps in an attempt to avoid yet another 4-4 split in a controversial case, SCOTUS justices have ordered parties on both sides of the contraceptive coverage battle in Zubik to file briefs describing how such coverage could be provided without religious groups having to put forth much effort to formally object. [Associated Press]

* “It’s mind bogglingly obvious, but often gets lost in the mix. Apart from checking there aren’t any conflicts, clients are rarely put at the heart of these mergers.” Go figure, but according to a new report by professional services consultancy Gulland Padfield, law firm mergers usually don’t benefit clients in any way, shape, or form. [Am Law Daily]

* It seems that Russian cybercriminal “Oleras” has hired hackers to break into the computer systems of 48 Biglaw firms so he can collect confidential client data and then trade on the stolen insider information. Thus far, he’s been unsuccessful. Has your law firm been targeted? If you’d like to know, check the list here. [Crain’s Chicago Business]

* The NFL is so pissed that the New York Times recently published a story linking the league to the tobacco industry that it not only wrote a two-part rebuttal that was more than 3000 words long, but it also sicced Paul Weiss attorneys on the paper of record in search of a retraction, claiming that the story was defamatory in nature. [Yahoo! Sports]

* “I will not go down. I want Bill Cosby in court.” A Los Angeles judge has ruled that model Janice Dickinson’s defamation case against Bill Cosby can move forward so that a jury can decide whether her allegations of rape are truthful, and further, whether a “liar” comment made by the comedian’s ex-lawyer, Marty Singer, was defamatory. [Telegram]

How do the legal costs associated with Deflategate and Watergate compare?

Judge Berman's decision is up for review. Will the judges default to his judgment or the weight of Supreme Court precedent.

* Democrats held a press conference demanding that Republicans do their job when it comes to filling Justice Scalia’s seat on the Supreme Court. My guess is a petition isn’t going to change anyone in the GOP’s mind on this one. [National Law Journal]

* District Judge John Gleeson is stepping down from his position next month. He’ll be returning to private practice at… Debevoise & Plimpton LLP. [Wall Street Journal]

* Virginia is considering legislation that would actually hid the names of all police officers. Less transparency for law enforcement? That is pretty much the exact opposite of what is needed. [Washington Post]

* You know how the NFL has been in the news a bunch for a variety of legal issues? The newly for-profit organization is releasing their tax filings, and their legal expenses are detailed. Ouch. [American Lawyer]

* Looks like attorneys formerly of Dickstein Shapiro are making themselves right at home at Blank Rome if their latest win for client Oshkosh Defense LLC is any indication. [Litigation Daily]

* Take a look at the details of the sexual assault lawsuit from the 90s against Donald Trump. [Law Newz]

This fan has some grievances with management and decided to share them during the big game.

* Today the United Nations Working Group on Arbitrary Detention held WikiLeaks founder Julian Assange, who has been at the Ecuadoran Embassy in London for more than three years, is being “arbitrarily detained” arguing he should be allowed freedom of movement without fear of being extradited to Sweden where he is wanted for questioning for a variety of charges including rape. Though the decision has no formal authority, but Assange, who has maintained his innocence on the Swedish charges, can at least claim a moral victory. That’s something at least. [Washington Post]

* The Fourth Circuit found that Maryland’s gun law, passed in the wake of the horrific Newton shooting, should be reviewed under a strict scrutiny standard since it “significantly burdens the exercise of the right to arm oneself at home” and remanded the case back to the district court. [Wall Street Journal]

* Uber had an actual victory amid all of its legal woes. The U.S. Judicial Panel on Multidistrict Litigation decided against combining over a dozen employment cases into a MDL. [National Law Journal]

* Meet the woman recently hired as the NFL’s senior vice president for investigations. Lisa Friel, formerly a New York prosecutor in the Sexual Victim’s Unit under District Attorney Robert M. Morgenthau, is charged with investigating all potential violations of the league’s personal conduct code. Hopefully she can bring some consistency to the process. [New York Times]

* The human cost behind a life led in immigration limbo. No wonder last night’s Dem debate spent so much time talking about the need for comprehensive immigration reform. [CNN]

St. Louis Rams fans use a lawsuit to strike back at the NFL.

How could the NFL screw this up? When you look at it, probably pretty easily.

* The Second Circuit has scheduled oral arguments in the NFL’s appeal of the Deflategate case for March 3. Roger Goodell is going to be pretty pissed off that Tom Brady can deflate his balls without being disturbed by legal issues until after Super Bowl 50. [Reuters]

* Corporate partner Pierre Boivin of McCarthy Tetrault, a Canadian Biglaw firm, was one of the hostages who survived the Mali terror attacks last Friday. According to the firm, his friends, family, and colleagues are “tremendously relieved” that he’s safe. [ABA Journal]

* LexisNexis purchased litigation analytics company Lex Machina for an undisclosed sum, but rumor has it that the company’s asking price was $30 to $35 million. Its co-founder says the deal came close to those numbers. [Big Law Business / Bloomberg]

* Just in time for Black Friday online deals, a new Symantec report is out that says consumers are growing increasingly vulnerable to cybercrime. On that note, let’s get to know each other a little better. What’s your mother’s maiden name? [WSJ Law Blog]

* If you’re planning to take the LSAT in December and you still don’t have a game plan set out for how you’re going to manage your time while taking the test, you may have already screwed yourself. Best of luck! [Law Admissions Lowdown / U.S. News]

* The Cincinnati Bengals reached a $255K settlement with their cheerleaders in a wage-and-hour suit. Each Ben-Gal stands to receive at least $2,500. Hmm, maybe they needed better lawyers who could BE AGGRESSIVE! B-E AGGRESSIVE! B-E A-G-G-R-E-S-S-I-V-E! [CBS News]

* Biglaw leaders think that first-year associates are likely to be replaced by robots within 10 years. Some even think that second- and third-year associates could be replaced by artificial intelligence. Damn, no wonder NY to $190 is still a pipedream. [Ars Technica via Am Law Daily]

* “What you’re asking them to do is do work for you.” Despite the fact that the cellphone was seized in an investigation, this federal magistrate judge says that he isn’t quite sure if he has the legal authority to compel Apple to access data on a locked iPhone. [Reuters]

* Justice waits for no one, except this defendant who allegedly murdered her 19-month-old daughter in 2010. After her trial was rescheduled for the 18th time, a judge finally decided he’d had enough: “Anything following this will be a trial or dismissal.” [WSJ Law Blog]

* If you’re trying to get into to law school, there’s no need to wait for your fall semester grades before you send off your applications. A pulse and the ability to sign federal loan documents are all that you’ll need. [Law School Lowdown / U.S. News & World Report]

* Daily lawyer tips is just killing it. The latest is on the perils of actually becoming a senior associate. [Daily Lawyer Tips]

* Lawyers can’t be getting dumber if no one (hyperbole alert) is passing the bar exam. [Bloomberg BNA]

* A kickstarter our readers are sure to love: a new board game that combines Would You Rather?, Poker, and Rock, Paper, Scissors with arguing. What’s not to love? [Kickstarter]

* Pile-on-the-SEC-week (the securities kind, not the football kind) continues. This time, Judge Berman is taking a crack. [Dealbreaker]

* The civil justice system is riddled with inequities, especially if you happen to be a plaintiff. [Mighty]

* Is a new pro-worker law in the works? [Lawyers, Guns & Money]

* The NFL field that is the subject of lawsuits is getting changed… not that they’re admitting any wrongdoing, natch. [Deadspin]

* The Ninth Circuit? Not a fan of Sheriff Joe. [AZ Central]

The NFLPA’s most recent plea to the federal judicial system - alleging that the league colluded to set a secret 2010 salary cap - has fallen flat.

What does the NFLPA President have to say about Deflategate?