Non-Sequiturs

  • Tyra Banks RF

    Non-Sequiturs

    Non-Sequiturs: 12.12.14

    * An “America’s Next Top Model” contestant sued Tyra Banks, claiming she was disqualified from the title because Banks found out she had worked as an escort. You’re looking for people who can walk back and forth in heels over and over. Who did you think was trying out for the show? [Courthouse News Service]

    * Dewey know which DLA Piper department head just declared personal bankruptcy? [New York Times]

    * Coming soon to the hipster haven near you: the artisanal attorney. Hilarious satirical piece by John Frank Weaver. [McSweeney’s]

    * Are you getting married? Are you planning to change your name? Huge mistake. The name part at least. Maybe the married part, I don’t know your deal. [The American Lawyer]

    * The Onion surveys the reaction to the Columbia Law exam policy. [The Onion]

    * You can’t force welfare recipients to get drug tests. Which was kind of obvious but still required a court to weigh in. [Pathologyblawg]

    * A New York judge allegedly stroked his secretary’s face, forced her to give him hugs, and regaled her with explicit tales of sex with his mistress. [New York Post]

    * There’s a wealth of information in this post about the ABA 509 Information Reports. Keith Lee does a year-over-year comparison of the top ten and bottom ten schools, looking for trends. [Associate’s Mind]

    * A BC government official has revoked approval of a law school based upon a pledge to discriminate against “the gays.” [Trinity Western University]

    9 Comments / / Dec 12, 2014 at 5:03 PM
  • lottery

    Non-Sequiturs

    Non-Sequiturs: 12.11.14

    * A registered sex offender wins the lottery. $3 million buys a lot of windowless vans. [Orlando Sentinel]

    * Judge to federal prosecutor: “You’re branded as a liar and you’ll remain a liar for the rest of your life.” [New York Observer]

    * A New York lawyer has been arrested and charged with running down 5 people in Herald Square. Alcohol and crack pipes are involved. And topless selfies. Look, you’re going to see more on this from Staci in the morning, so just sit tight. [Inquisitr]

    * If you want to live in a mansion, all you need to do is forge a few documents. [Gawker]

    * The Supreme Court of Canada says cops can search your phone when they arrest you. But only to check the Habs score. [Ars Technica]

    * Another installment of Posner on Posner. This time focusing on the First Amendment. [Concurring Opinions]

    * This week we learned there’s a thing called “rectal feeding.” Professor Michael Dorf on why it’s totally a war crime. [Dorf on Law]

    * How many law schools will close by 2020? [TaxProf Blog]

    * Want to be on the LSAC Board of Trustees? It’s not like they have any glaring problems that require a leadership change. [LSAC]

    33 Comments / / Dec 11, 2014 at 5:04 PM
  • 1024px-Flag_of_Alaska.svg

    Non-Sequiturs

    Non-Sequiturs: 12.10.14

    * An Assistant DA in Barrow, Alaska, was shot and killed the other day, allegedly by a man jealous that his ex-girlfriend had started dating the ADA. [KTUU]

    * Legislature amends law “to protect quacks.” That sounds like a good use of their time. [Slate]

    * David appeared on Today’s Verdict to discuss his new book, Supreme Ambitions. Also on the show was the creator of Lawsuit — The Game, featured in our holiday gift guide for lawyers. [BronxNet]

    * “How Many Bites Do Sloppy Lawyers Get At The Apple?” Oh. I get it. [Redline]

    * Lawrence Mitchell is back and talking about inequality. It’s much more what you’d expect from a legal academic than poetry about ogling women in the park. [Washington Post]

    * Sometimes even squishy toys take a hit: Nerf ordered to pay $73 million in back royalties. [North Dallas Gazette]

    * Congrats to Gawker General Counsel Heather Dietrick on her new role as President. [New York Observer]

    * Sad news: Kirkland associate and Northwestern Law ’13 grad Jeremy Adler died unexpectedly last week. Our thoughts are with his family and friends. [Inside Bay Area]

    1 Comment / / Dec 10, 2014 at 5:31 PM
  • HungerGamesPoster

    Non-Sequiturs

    Non-Sequiturs: 12.09.14

    * New Jersey’s new tort liability ruling is an important first step to a real-life Hunger Games. [The Legal Blitz]

    * A holiday shopping guide to beer and wine involved in intellectual property disputes. Clever. [Trademark and Copyright Law Blog]

    * “There’s an app for that!” Lawyers create “Driving While Black” app for your smartphone. [The Oregonian]

    * Speaking of Oregon, the University of Oregon is in the midst of a teaching strike that not only impacts its football team, but caused an immigration law issue when statements the school made were interpreted as threats to the immigration status of foreign teachers if they joined the strike. [Daily Nous]

    * According to Dean LeDuc, Thomas M. Cooley Law is sad that it failed to sell the Mason Temple building in downtown Lansing to the state senate. Except there’s not really any mention that the state senate was ever interested. Perhaps their interest was reported by the same people behind the Cooley Rankings. [Lansing City Pulse]

    * If you liked Mark Hermann’s rundown of business development tactics, here some other suggestions for what more lawyers and law students could be doing to develop business. [Law and More]

    * New OSHA rules a-comin’. [Lawyers, Guns & Money]

    3 Comments / / Dec 9, 2014 at 5:30 PM
  • ue1rzou0v0zczi6obyae

    Non-Sequiturs

    Non-Sequiturs: 12.08.14

    * The NAACP Legal Defense Fund took to Twitter to name every unarmed person of color killed by the police since 1999. Gawker compiled short bios on each. [Gawker]

    * Texas planning to ban the “affluenza” defense. [Lowering the Bar]

    * Pillsbury just moved into a cozy little office. Emphasis on “little.” [The National Law Journal]

    * Georgetown Law students of color raise similar concerns as Columbia students. Again, I don’t understand emotional trauma and I definitely think extensions should be measured in days and not weeks, but it strikes me all the people complaining about the extensions are just exposing themselves as bad students. If you think your neighbor getting 2 more days will hurt your grade, you’re the one with the studying problem. [Georgetown Law Coalition]

    * And now Harvard. [Harvard Law Coalition]

    * If you rent a refrigerator, you consent to an arbitrator hearing your case after a repairman robs and beats you. Sounds about right. [Public Justice]

    * Uber ban after rape allegations. [Redline]

    * The Supreme Court told BP that no matter how much it tried, it can’t slip out of its settlement agreement like an oil-soaked seagull. [Think Progress]

    * Finally, in the wake of the Eric Garner case, it’s worth looking back at what Justice Marshall told us about police chokeholds. [Mother Jones]

    8 Comments / / Dec 8, 2014 at 5:04 PM
  • Oh New York, why did you have to make Caesar angry?

    Non-Sequiturs

    Non-Sequiturs: 12.05.14

    * New York has rejected recognizing a chimpanzee as a “person.” [PrawfsBlawg]

    * Which law schools are most conservative? Most liberal? [FiveThirtyEight]

    * Elie’s new job as “deal judge.” [Dealbreaker]

    * Lawyer suspended amid accusations that he sexted three clients with nude photos of himself and told one “she could ‘ride bareback’ with him.” [ABA Journal]

    * Duquesne says it denied professor tenure because she was bad at the whole “teaching” part of her job. Whoa! When has that ever mattered to tenure? [TaxProf Blog]

    * Josh and Jess sit down with Judge Matthew Sciarrino to talk about the new Star Wars trailer. I don’t know. Looks kind of boring. We need George Lucas to spice it up with a Special Edition version. [The Legal Geeks]

    * Prosecutor recites “Dixie” at closing argument of a black man’s trial. [Idaho Statesman]

    9 Comments / / Dec 5, 2014 at 4:42 PM
  • Captainamerica1

    Non-Sequiturs

    Non-Sequiturs: 12.04.14

    Captainamerica1* Finally something with bipartisan support. Nazis are bad. [Lowering the Bar]

    * 80 year old law student graduates. We would say he’ll literally being paying this off for the rest of his life, but… England. [Legal Cheek]

    * Elie was in the paper today! [New York Daily News]

    * Yesterday we had a partner admitting law firms are targets for hackers. Maybe those hackers should take on the geniuses at Sony. [Gawker]

    RELATED STORIES
    My Journey From Biglaw to SmallLaw
    More Bad Cybersecurity News – Top-Tier Malware Regin Used for Spying Since 2008
    Morning Docket: 12.04.14
    * Looking for a cool job? Here’s one. Seriously, this looks like a great gig for someone looking to get into altLaw. [Diligence Engine]

    * Biglaw runs up big bills. Really big bills. [Last Honest Lawyer]

    * Blast from the past: patent pendency in 1993. [Patently O]

    3 Comments / / Dec 4, 2014 at 5:00 PM
  • cigarette

    Non-Sequiturs

    Non-Sequiturs: 12.03.14

    * As we’ve addressed, the grand jury declined to indict the officer in the police-cause homicide — per the medical examiner — of Eric Garner. [New York Times]

    * This is a good time to remember Eric Garner was killed for the horrible crime of selling loosies, a product that developed a black market in NYC in response to rising cigarette taxes. Evading cigarette taxes should be a crime. But, like, a “here’s your $50 ticket” crime, not the death penalty. [Huffington Post]

    * An anonymous Georgetown law student has filed suit against the school and one of its instructors, Rabbi Barry Freundel, for “luring her to the bath as part of her studies at the school.” And who didn’t have that lesson in Civ Pro? [Washington Post]

    * Another in the continuing series looking back on a decade of Chief Justice Roberts. This time looking back at the slow and steady drive to curtail women’s rights. [Constitutional Accountability Center]

    * Remember the woman suing the owner of the dog that her dogs killed? She’s dropped her suit. [ABC News]

    * The Bar Association of San Francisco is hosting an event next Tuesday featuring Chief Judge Alex Kozinski entitled: The Wizard of Koz. Um, may not be the best time to use to “Cos” sound in a title. But that aside, it promises to be an interesting event if you’re in the area. [San Francisco Bar]

    * Brian Finch of Pillsbury Winthrop talks cyberattacks and admits what everyone else wants to deny: law firms are a weak link in cybersecurity. [Bloomberg TV]

    10 Comments / / Dec 3, 2014 at 5:15 PM
  • Scantron

    Non-Sequiturs

    Non-Sequiturs: 12.02.14

    Scantron* A modest proposal for a new course evaluation form. [LawProfBlawg]

    * An interview with former Senator George Mitchell. Did you know he turned down Justice Breyer’s seat because he wanted “to pass significant health care legislation.” The appropriate 90s response is to cue Nelson Muntz. [Coverage Opinions]

    * George Washington may have doomed your smartphone privacy. But if it makes you feel any better he probably didn’t mean to. [Redline]

    * California lawyers are 35 percent more in debt than they were 6 years ago. [Cal Lawyer]

    * “He sent three clients explicit text messages that included photographs of his erect penis.” Fun addendum: if you read the full opinion, because the associate wrote off his time for sex that was, rightly, the firm’s 8.4 violation! I hope they weren’t the ones who turned him in. [Legal Profession Blog]

    * A panel of legal analysts weigh in on the nomination of Loretta Lynch to succeed Eric Holder as Attorney General and discuss what her nomination means in the context of civil rights. [RH Reality Check]

    * Do you need a live CLE lecture? Pick up 12 credits and grab some drinks with some ATL editors afterward. [Above the Law]

    6 Comments / / Dec 2, 2014 at 5:00 PM
  • bananas

    Non-Sequiturs

    Non-Sequiturs: 12.01.14

    * What’s happening to all the Bingham partners that are not joining Morgan Lewis? Here’s the latest on the lateral moves of “the Forgotten.” [Reuters (sub. req.)]

    * “Is that a banana in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?” That’s not at all what police said after throwing a guy in jail for brandishing a banana. [CBS News]

    * Is it possible to save the Supreme Court from partisanship? [Bloomberg Politics]

    * You think you had a ritzy Thanksgiving dinner? Well, some jackholes somewhere spent $35,000 for a Thanksgiving dinner devoted to conspicuous consumption in a world of inequity. [Daily Kos]

    * Shearman & Sterling’s Richard Hsu continues his wonderful podcast on the lives of lawyers, this week chatting with Sean Patrick Butler, Sr. Corporate Counsel at Cisco, about Butler’s decision to live two hours away from San Francisco to live the rural life. [Hsu Untied]

    * This guy is compiling stats on bar exam testing patterns. He’s got some California data up already. Perhaps with some reader contributions, he can get widespread coverage. [Bar Exam Stats]

    * When it comes to legal scholarship, women are earning more citations than men according to one study. There are a lot of caveats to be had, but it looks like the law has one, finite area where the gender gap is narrow. [TaxProf Blog]

    * One-third of lawyers are taking on more pro bono work these days. Good for them. [Robert Half Legal]

    16 Comments / / Dec 1, 2014 at 5:05 PM
  • devil's advocate

    Non-Sequiturs

    Non-Sequiturs: 11.26.14

    Ed. note: Above the Law will be dark on Thanksgiving and on a reduced publishing schedule on Friday, November 28, while we recover from turkey-induced comas.

    * Holy backfire Batman! Florida desperately wanted to display a nativity scene in the State Capitol because it’s more important than making real laws. Now they’re probably going to be forced to display a scene from the Satanic Temple. [Slate]

    * Researchers assert that college prestige has no bearing on the quality of the teaching. Would this carry over to law schools? [TaxProf Blog]

    * The National Bar Association, representing predominantly African-American attorneys and judges, has issued a response to the grand jury’s decision in the Michael Brown shooting. [The National Bar Association]

    * Speaking of Ferguson, apparently the investigator listed Darren Wilson as the “victim.” If you needed any more evidence of the power of semantics. [Lowering the Bar]

    * The CATO Institute talks about the First Amendment and One, Inc. v. Olesen. It’s an hour-and-a-half panel discussion. Pretty impressive for a 24-word (plus one citation) decision. [C-SPAN]

    * Is it a lie? Well, that depends on what your definition of “lie” is? [Dorf on Law]

    * Are over the knee boots appropriate office attire? [Corporette]

    * 8 women who left the law to follow their passions. [One 400]

    * Yesterday, we suggested you should write more thank you notes. Well, here are some reasons why you shouldn’t. [The Muse ]

    29 Comments / / Nov 26, 2014 at 1:41 PM
  • police tape RF

    Non-Sequiturs

    Non-Sequiturs: 11.25.14

    * Grand juries rarely let someone go without an indictment unless it’s a cop. Apparently pigs do not make for ham sandwiches. Instead of wishing for another rubber stamp indictment, this may be a good time to demand that everyone benefit from such skeptical grand juries. [FiveThirtyEight]

    * Well that’s an interesting name… [Legal Juice]

    * Have you written a thank you note lately? Probably not. But you should. [What About Clients?]

    * Professor Ilya Somin reviews Lat’s Supreme Ambitions (affiliate link) and talks about the importance of blogs. We agree with him. [The Volokh Conspiracy / Washington Post]

    * Maybe you should ditch that temp legal job and go into PR? [Law and More]

    * Kinney Recruiting expands its operations to Chicago. [Kinney Recruiting]

    8 Comments / / Nov 25, 2014 at 5:29 PM
  • moot court

    Non-Sequiturs

    Non-Sequiturs: 11.24.14

    * 2014 Moot Court rankings. Florida Coastal? Really? Good for them. [The National Jurist]

    * Young lawyers are making legal mobile apps. Great, now I’m going to start getting notifications about helping friends out with their LawVille game. [TaxProf Blog]

    * Judge sends motivational tweet, no big deal. No judge sends motivational tweet DURING A MURDER TRIAL, now there’s something! [Legal Cheek]

    * A number of law professors filed a brief supporting the NCAA in the Ed O’Bannon antitrust appeal. What do you know, there’s actually someone out there supporting the NCAA. [CBS Sports]

    * Cooley LLP is representing Immigration Judge Ashley Tabaddor in an interesting lawsuit against the DOJ. Judge Tabaddor is Iranian-American, and the DOJ ordered her off all cases involving Iranians based on her heritage. That… doesn’t sound right. [Cooley LLP]

    * Ron Collins kicks off a multi-part series on Judge Richard Posner. [Concurring Opinions]

    * English was William F. Buckley’s third language? Huh. Never knew that. [What About Clients?]

    * David and Elie appeared on Power Lunch today to discuss bonus season. Video below. [CNBC]

    9 Comments / / Nov 24, 2014 at 4:33 PM
  • Cooley Law Logo USE

    Non-Sequiturs

    Non-Sequiturs: 11.21.14

    * A breakdown of Thomas M. Cooley’s bar passage rate. It’s… about as depressing as you’d expect. [Third Tier Reality]

    * Rapper being prosecuted on the argument that he benefitted from gang activity because the gang’s exploits made his rap music more popular. What the hell? [Popehat]

    * The state of the clerkship hiring process gets mixed reviews from Yalies. [Yale Daily News]

    * UNC is looking for a new dean. You know, if you’re interested in becoming a dean. [The Faculty Lounge]

    * The Flash and res ipsa loquitur. [The Legal Geeks]

    * Fun fact: people interested in the law also seem to love anchovy paste and Destiny’s Child. At least in the U.K. [Legal Cheek]

    * The Marshall Project, a nonprofit, nonpartisan news organization devoted to criminal justice reform, just went online. Check ‘em out. [The Marshall Project]

    * Don’t overdo it when you go about “thinking like a lawyer.” [Law and More]

    * The long-running, racist soap opera in Manhattan state court takes a new turn. After playing a key role in the events that led to the ouster of the top aide to the New York County Clerk, Justice Milton Tingling has applied to be the new New York County Clerk. [WiseLaw NY]

    * In light of Speaker Boehner’s new lawsuit over Obamacare, this is a good time to look back at this interview with Laurence Tribe evaluating Boehner’s chances. [Coverage Opinions]

    15 Comments / / Nov 21, 2014 at 5:16 PM
  • Manson

    Non-Sequiturs

    Non-Sequiturs: 11.20.14

    * Charles Manson is getting married. Have folks uncovered his registry yet? Or is this just hilarious trolling? [Lowering the Bar]

    * No, Tim Tebow did not get arrested soliciting a prostitute, no matter what your Facebook feed tells you. It’s obviously false. I watched his pro career, he can’t score for money. [Snopes]

    * Remember the lawyer who dressed up like Thomas Jefferson and declared himself “incompetent” at his own disciplinary hearing? Well, now we have video of this insane argument. [Above the Law]

    * Take the quiz: Drug or Pokemon character. [The Volokh Conspiracy / Washington Post]

    * Prosecutor wants to withdraw evidence rather than reveal how the cops got it. That doesn’t sound shady at all. [Slate]

    * Professor Richard Sander keeps riding that “affirmative action is bad because it lets in dumb (minority) kids” train. [TaxProf Blog]

    * Shearman & Sterling partner Richard Hsu interviews Tae Hea Nahm, a former partner at Wilson Sonsini who moved from law to venture capitalism. [Hsu Tube]

    * Bloomberg BNA launches a new product, Bloomberg Law: Banking, to provide legal and business intelligence for banking professionals. [Bloomberg BNA]

    * Buffalo attorney Alfonzo Cutaia took time lapse video of the Lake Erie lake effect from his office window. It’s gone viral, and it’s pretty clear why. That’s some messed up weather right there. [YouTube]

    9 Comments / / Nov 20, 2014 at 5:01 PM
  • stripper_heels_g7

    Contract Attorneys, Department of Justice, Document Review, Immigration, In-House Counsel, Labor / Employment, Legal Ethics, Non-Sequiturs

    Non-Sequiturs: 11.19.14

    * First the cheerleaders went after their employers in wage and hours suits. Now strippers. And the strippers are winning. [Slate]

    * Prince Harry’s ex, Chelsy Davy, has left her Biglaw gig as an Allen & Overy associate. So that’s what happens when you lose the real-life version of I Wanna Marry Harry. [Legal Cheek]

    * Despite the shrill response on cable news, President Obama’s executive action on immigration will be totally legal. [New Republic]

    * DOJ seeks to disqualify anyone who knows about all the DOJ’s misconduct. Clever trick! [New York Observer]

    * If you’re doing contract work, you could stave off the boredom or you could go the failed mobster route and be a rat. [Law and More]

    * Somewhere along the line, obvious puffery turned into false advertising suits and it’s costing some companies big bucks. [Corporate Counsel]

    * The latest in litigation financing: crowdfunding your lawsuit. [TechCrunch]

    10 Comments / / Nov 19, 2014 at 5:27 PM
  • soccer ball world cup

    Law Professors, Non-Sequiturs, Rape, Sports

    Non-Sequiturs: 11.18.14

    * We are coming to Chicago, and we’d love to see you at our event on Thursday night — RSVP here. [Above the Law]

    * Wait, FIFA may be dishonest? Kirkland partner Michael Garcia announces plans to appeal after FIFA releases ethics report on the Russia and Qatar World Cup bidding process that contains “numerous materially incomplete and erroneous representations of the facts and conclusions.” And he should know since he worked on the investigation. [Am Law Daily]

    * Behold the all-purpose citation! [Lowering the Bar]

    * Regarding yesterday’s crazy “woman sues the owner of the dog that her dogs killed,” an astute reader notes that a year ago, the Texas Supreme Court limited damages in pet deaths to “animal’s market worth.” So in the interest of reining in damages, the courts gave the victim less incentive to sue than the owner of the perpetrators. Sounds like a great system there. [Dallas Morning News]

    * The holidays are around the corner. Get that special lawyer some prints of courthouses around the country to spruce up their office. [Courthouses of America]

    * Wow. California school district argues that 14-year-old girl could legally consent to sex with her teacher because, I mean, come on, we all knew she was a slut. This happened. In 2014. [Slate]

    * Advice that should go double for lawyers: sometimes you really just need to drop acid to clear your head. [What About Clients?]

    * Professors who refuse to retire are the worst. [TaxProf Blog]

    27 Comments / / Nov 18, 2014 at 5:04 PM
  • alcohol and sorrow

    Drinking, Federalist Society, Murder, Non-Sequiturs

    Non-Sequiturs: 11.17.14

    * ADA complaint filed by former TV anchor fired for drunkenness. On behalf of the ATL staff, we’re watching this one closely. [Chicagoland Radio and Media]

    * Some of these made their way into the pages of Above the Law before, but this is an excellent compilation of “12 Unbelievable Courtroom Moments Caught on Tape.” [Robert Reeves Law]

    * Rhinos, sharks, and the Secretary of Commerce walk into an Elie post… [Redline]

    * A look back at FedSoc’s 2014 National Lawyers Convention. It sounds like it ended with Bailey’s and hot chocolate with Justice Don Willett, so that can’t be bad. [Wonkette]

    * Butthurt police detective suing defense lawyer for criticizing the investigation. [Washington Post]

    * BP argues that fining them more than they’re willing to pay for poisoning the Gulf of Mexico would be “legal chaos.” As opposed to that regular chaos of dumping millions of barrels of oil into the water and getting a slap on the wrist for it. [Breaking Energy]

    * Banker with ties to Linklaters, Skadden, and Latham & Watkins awaiting trial for murdering two prostitutes in Hong Kong. Just go ahead and put whatever American Psycho joke you think of here. [Roll on Friday]

    * Should litigation financing be disclosed? [Litigation Funding Central]

    * A collection of stories about the diversity issues at Harvard Law School. Sounds like a delightful place if you’re white, male, and heterosexual. [Socratic Shortcomings]

    10 Comments / / Nov 17, 2014 at 5:02 PM