Polygamy

* “It’s Washington’s bloodsport. It’s like the gladiator going into the arena and the public watching.” Senator Jeff Sessions has been preparing for his confirmation hearing for U.S. attorney general since December, and he expects to be grilled on the same allegations of racism that precluded him from landing a federal judgeship in 1986. Something tells us that he won’t have a similar problem this time around. [CNN]

* “We are very pleased to announce that after extensive discussions with our regulators, we will be starting classes as scheduled.” Charlotte School of Law will be reopening for the spring semester (albeit one day later than previously scheduled), but at this point in time, there’s no word on whether students will be able to procure federal loans to finance the costs of attendance. How are these students supposed to pay? [Charlotte Observer]

* According to the latest report from the Bureau of Labor Statistics, the legal sector had a great month in December, adding 2,000 jobs and outpacing national figures for the month. All in all, the legal industry is up by 4,100 jobs since the start of 2016, but this is a far cry from where the numbers used to be prior to the recession. By that logic, the legal industry still down by 52,000 jobs since its high in 2007. [Am Law Daily]

* On January 19, the justices of the Supreme Court will discuss whether they will take up the case to legalize polygamy being brought by the reality TV “Sister Wives” family. If they decide to grant certiorari, it will be the first time in more than 100 years that an issue of this kind will be reviewed by the high court. Just imagine the special episodes and the ratings extravaganza that could result from oral arguments. [FOX News]

* IMDb.com doesn’t care if celebrities don’t want their true ages revealed online, so in the name of the First Amendment, the site is refusing to comply with a new California law that would require the removal of their age information upon demand. Instead of passing age discrimination laws, California has “chosen instead to chill free speech and to undermine access to factual information of public interest.” [WSJ Law Blog]

* Howrey doing with all those profit clawbacks for unfinished business? The bankruptcy trustee for this defunct firm filed an appeal with the Ninth Circuit to determine whether his method of collecting cash for the insolvent firm’s estate was legal, and in an amicus brief, the ABA has sided with the law firms being bilked for funds, saying such efforts must be nixed. [ABA Journal]

* The Tenth Circuit dismissed a challenge to Utah’s ban on polygamy that was brought by TLC’s “Sister Wives” family, saying they didn’t have standing to sue as they were no longer subject to a credible threat of prosecution. This will probably add fuel to the rumors that the show is on the verge of cancellation before Season 7. [WSJ Law Blog]

* The SEC has charged Texas Attorney General Ken Paxton in connection to a stock scam involving tech company Servergy. Paxton allegedly assisted the company with raising investor funds, but never disclosed his commissions. With three pending criminal indictments and a bar complaint, this guy is batting 1000. [Dallas Morning News]

* Reclaim Harvard Law protestors who have been occupying the school’s student center claim that they found a voice-activated recording device in “Belinda Hall,” and have interpreted this as an “intentional effort to surveil [their] movement.” If your goal was to get people to listen to your message, consider this an achievement unlocked. [Observer]

* If you’re uncertain about your law school decision, you can certainly put down multiple seat deposits, but we’re not sure why you would want to. By all means, start your legal education by putting yourself into debt — you’ll be off to a great start for the six figures of loans you’ll have accumulated by graduation. [Law Admissions Lowdown / U.S. News]

* It’s official: Justice Clarence Thomas hasn’t asked a question during oral arguments at the Supreme Court in a decade. No other justice in history has ever done something like this, but Justice Thomas is “confident enough in his own skin not to care.” [MSNBC]

* Who would make a better SCOTUS justice, Judge Sri Srinivasan of the D.C. Circuit or U.S. Attorney for the Southern District of New York Preet Bharara? President Obama may be wondering when deciding whether to appoint the high court’s first Asian-American justice. [New York Daily News]

* Judge H. Russel Holland was presiding over the DOJ’s action against two allegedly discriminatory polygamous cities on the Utah-Arizona border when he was rushed away in an ambulance. He had a terrible case of bronchitis. Feel better, Your Honor! [AP]

* Gowlings, Canada’s second-largest firm, merged with UK-based Wragge Lawrence Graham to form an international firm with 1,400+ lawyers in 10 countries. Accept our cautionary congratulations, since layoffs usually follow mergers of this size. [Reuters]

* Aww, how cute! After working as a fully integrated firm for almost two years, Squire Patton Boggs has announced its first-ever merger with another firm. Welcome San Francisco-based firm Carroll Burdick & McDonough to the party. [Plain Dealer]

* Mayer Brown is relying on a lateral associate to help its Cuba practice shore up client relations on the island through all of her connections there, which have been described as “hot property.” She even got her own press release. [Big Law Business / Bloomberg]

I hope the "water wife" concept comes to California.

Justice Alito uses a humorous hypothetical to explore the slippery slope.

If only this guy were at an Am Law 100 firm so we could make Biglaw/Big Love jokes.

* Mayor Bloomberg is filing suit to overturn New York’s Living Wage law, because wasting a bunch of money pursuing a lawsuit for the last two weeks of his term is the kind of efficiency he brings to the table as a biznessmun. [DNAInfo] * Judge Richard Leon puts the NSA metadata surveillance program on ice. Looks like someone's going to get bugged. [Slate] * Someone’s asking for a fake college transcript in Baton Rouge. Pretty sure LSU’s athletic department could give you a hand. [Law and More] * Considering the polygamy ruling in Utah, here’s an interesting analysis of the constitutionality of bestiality laws. This seems like an appropriate place to link this song about a guy who broke into the Lincoln Park zoo in Chicago. [The Volokh Conspiracy] * Here’s a fun game: replace the name of the school and the course of study and marvel at how easily it could pass for an article Elie wrote. [Huffington Post] * These folks got smacked with a cybersquatting charge because they used a logical domain name to publicize an ongoing dispute. It’s a lot easier to sue people than to build a solid home. [IT-Lex] * In sad news, the victim in a recent carjacking-related killing was Dustin Friedland, a Syracuse law grad who worked with Adam Leitman Bailey. Our thoughts are with the Friedland family. [NY Daily News] * The Beastie Boys are suing GoldieBlox over the latter’s viral ad set to a parody of “Girls.” Unlike GoldieBlox, NYU Law professor Chris Sprigman doesn’t need an elaborate Rube Goldberg machine to burst the Beastie Boys’ bubble. Video embedded after the jump… [Bloomberg Law via YouTube]

* “She changed how the world looked at us: from scrappy lawyers to a force to be reckoned with.” As the very first female name partner of an Am Law 100 firm, the Biglaw world is Kathleen Sullivan’s oyster. Quinn Emanuel Urquhart & Sullivan thanks you kindly. [American Lawyer]

* “You hate to lose a great lawyer, but if you’re going to this is the way to do it.” Akin Gump might have recently lost partner Patricia Ann Millett to the D.C. Circuit, but her replacement, Pratik Shah, is working hard to fill her impressive shoes peep-toes. [National Law Journal]

* Alan Dershowitz will be stepping down from his position at Harvard Law School at the end of the week. Perhaps he’ll be able to find some time to join O.J. Simpson in the hunt for the real killers. [Boston Globe]

* Stephen McDaniel, the law grad accused of dismembering classmate Lauren Giddings, is back in the news. His alleged condom-stealing burglary capers are inadmissible at his murder trial. [Macon Telegraph]

* As if TLC’s critically acclaimed “Sister Wives” couldn’t get any better, a judge declared parts of Utah’s polygamy statute unconstitutional. Just imagine the ratings gold because of this ruling. [Salt Lake Tribune]

* It appears crack isn’t so wack after all, because Toronto’s crack-smoking mayor has a bevy of supporters who have stepped up to pay all of his legal bills. Waste your bonus money by donating here. [CBC News]

How long would you have lasted at this firm?

* An attorney from Orrick with two SCOTUS clerkships under his belt will now be arguing a case before the high court. Seems standard, but the exciting part is that this guy’s still an associate. Congratulations! [Am Law Daily]

* From Biglaw to Boutique, the Finnegan edition: five IP lawyers, including a member of the firm’s management committee, will be starting their own practice. We may have more on this later. [Thomson Reuters News & Insight]

* Calling all wannabe government lawyers! Screw the sequester; the Department of Justice is planning to add more than 100 positions in 2014. Let’s hope these budget requests are approved. [Legal Times]

* “I actually felt sick working him for him.” If you were a paralegal and your boss was allegedly trying to recruit you to be his “third wife,” you’d feel the same. Expect more on this on this later. [New York Post]

* Here are 25 Northeast law schools ranked by employment rate. At least my school wasn’t ranked dead last on this list, and that’s something to be excited about… right? [Boston Business Journal]

* Maybe more people will care about law schools when their credit ratings tank. Speaking of which, thanks to a 14% drop in enrollment, Standard & Poor’s has downgraded Albany Law. [Times Union]

* Joseph Feller, an environmentalist and beloved professor at ASU College of Law, RIP. [ASU Law]

* Statistically speaking, with its current line up, the Supreme Court is the most conservative that it’s been since the 1930s. This chart makes even Justice Kennedy looks conservative. [FiveThirtyEight / New York Times]

* And another one gone, and another one gone, another one bites the dust: earlier this week, Dewey lost an antitrust partner to Arent Fox. That brings the firm’s grand total of partner defections to 38. [Am Law Daily]

* Jerry Sandusky’s trial has been postponed until June to due to “logistical contingencies” — like a motion to dismiss all of his child sex abuse charges. Meh, it’s no big deal. Same verdict, different day. [Bloomberg]

* And on a similar note, Warren Jeffs tried — and failed — to appeal his child sex abuse conviction. Because apparently that’s what happens when you represent yourself in the hopes of overturning a life sentence. [CNN]

* Lindsay Lohan’s supervised probation has ended, and for the time being, her legal woes are over. When will she screw up again? I’m going to give her three months, and that’s being really generous. [Daily Telegraph]

* More law school graduates are trying to get their day in court for bankruptcy protection. Looks like these people didn’t read their student loan MPNs carefully (or at all). They state pretty clearly that you’re screwed for life. [Reuters] * Part-time programs are closing their doors. Even Cooley Law took a hit, trimming its […]

[O]ne is a practicing polygamist, and he’s not even the Mormon. — Retired Supreme Court Justice Sandra Day O’Connor, commenting on the differences between leading Republican presidential candidates Mitt Romney and Newt Gingrich during a speech at the Alfalfa Club.

* Sprint hopped in bed with Skadden to sue AT&T over its proposed merger with T-Mobile. Somewhere in America, the Verizon guy is cackling with glee. “Can you hear me now, b*tches?” [Bloomberg] * “I would love to dominate and humiliate and degrade you, privately of course.” Remember this guy? Six of the nine charges […]

* TLC’s Sister Wives are challenging Utah’s bigamy laws. More power to these polygamist people, especially the men. They deserve some credit for tolerating a handful of wives. [Jonathan Turley] * Screw law students, we need to keep our professors employed. This is definitely the most important thing the ABA needs to worry about right […]