Property

(c) Image by Juri H. Chinchilla.

Forty-five years ago yesterday, on July 20, 1969, Edwin “Buzz” Aldrin and Neil Armstrong stepped into history. Shortly before 11 p.m. Eastern time, the pair emerged from their landing craft, the Eagle, and became the first men to set foot on the moon. This week, On Remand looks back at that “one giant leap for mankind” and two space suits:  the cases of the missing moon rock and the unidentified Martian matter.

Of the twenty-one hours Aldrin and Armstrong stayed on the moon, only two and a half were spent exploring the moon’s surface. After transmitting “the Eagle has landed” to the relief and exuberance of NASA mission control, the men did not impulsively charge from the Eagle like the Griswolds from their station wagon at Walley World. More than six hours passed before Aldrin and Armstrong opened the Eagle’s door and stretched their legs. What were they doing?

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Justice Scalia is kind of a troll sometimes. He routinely snarks out his fellow justices and is a total dick to legal luminaries like Judge Posner. His belligerence is drenched in sarcasm and usually arbitrary.

In a sense, Antonin Scalia is ATL’s spirit guide.

But when he went after an attorney appearing before him, he got immediately chastised by a fellow justice and raised the ire of even conservative commentators.

In this instance, I’m going out on a limb and say Justice Scalia was absolutely, positively, 100 percent right….

double red triangle arrows Continue reading “Justice Scalia Mercilessly Mocks A Lawyer (And He Was Totally Right To Do It)”

It’s an adverse possession story! We have an adverse possession story. Pull out your first-year Property casebooks and remember that time in law school you learned that “law words” sometimes have no bearing on what those words mean in the regular world.

There’s a guy who is going around Ohio, “possessing” what he calls abandoned houses, and then filing quiet-title claims against the real owners. The actions have worried the owners (at least some of whom have their houses in foreclosure by the banks). In more entertaining news, we get to watch local media react with horror as they confront the mere possibility of adverse possession. I love when laypeople confront Property issues; they’re always so confused and frightened. Prescriptive easements! Fee simple! PERPETUITIES!

Anyway, of all the non-lawyers involved, the worst is the guy actually trying to possess these houses. He’s a man who knows just enough to be stupid….

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* First things first: remember to send us your legally themed Halloween costumes! [Above the Law]

* George Clooney may be dating the “hottest female barrister in London.” [Legal Cheek]

* This painting suggests there’s a senior partner who gets away with wearing sandals to work. [Lowering the Bar]

* This is a really useful practice tip: how to cite URLs in briefs without having them look all messed up. [The Volokh Conspiracy]

* O.J. Simpson’s house sold at a foreclosure auction for a mere $655,000. This must be a disappointing deal for him — I’m sure he expected to make a killing. [Daily Business Review]

* Blackacre blocks access to a public beach. But the owner of Blackacre uses the Mexican-American War as an excuse to ignore the easement. Apparently he wins. People are also entirely awful. [Valleywag]

* I also hate when McDonald’s screws up my order, but it’s not worth getting the police involved. [Legal Juice]

You’ve been served.

Nudists seem like they’d be pretty chill people. It’s the kind of thing a bunch of aging hippies do when they want to pretend that they’re living in a production of Hair.

That’s why a protracted legal showdown between a nudist resort and one of its residents over swinging, cock rings, and property rights is so unusual.

Catherine Holmes feels the camp has morphed from a free-wheeling celebration of Naturism into a swingers club and hostile environment for children. She wants to sell her cabin and move. Camp administrators think she’s a troublemaker and want to kick her out of her cabin. They maintain that all the sexually provocative things Holmes alleges (some of which she backs with photographic evidence) are just “jokes.”

If everyone agrees that Holmes should move, why can’t everyone just agree to let her sell?

Because there’s no shortage of cojones in a nudist colony, that’s why…

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Last week, I included a fun, “when law professors attack” link in Non-Sequiturs, about an adjunct property professor at the University of Oregon School of Law. Since then, we’ve received more tips about the outburst and its aftermath — and couldn’t help ourselves but to double-dip into this story.

The professor, James Olmsted, got into a dust-up with a student protest group, snagging one of their phones and seeming to goad the protesters into a fight. Hippie protesters can be annoying, but, I mean, if you hate hippie protesters, you may not want to work in Eugene.

What makes the story so confusing is the lack of anything in the professor’s bio to indicate that he’d launch a tirade like this….

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* Republican Senator Rob Portman announces his support for gay marriage after learning that his son is gay. Yay! Let’s all celebrate him for meeting the lowest threshold of human decency once he found a purely selfish reason to change. [ABC News]

* Wait, they can declare martial law in Brooklyn? I thought they could only do that in terrible movies. [Before It's News]

* A Southern District of Florida clerk is named one of Southern Florida’s most eligible bachelors. Our bachelor “claims to be the other white meat” and to “have a lot in common with Christian Grey.” He doesn’t sound douchey at all. [Brickell Magazine (jump to page 91)]

* Comparing Chicago Law faculty to Game of Thrones characters produces surprisingly accurate results. [UChilawgo]

* With law schools raising tuition and the profession shrinking… more people need to rush to law school. Keep sipping that sweet, sweet Kool-Aid, buddy. [Daily Princetonian]

* GW Law’s Barrister’s Ball — $2500 fee for vomiting! [GW Law SBA]

* Watch Elie talk about Wayne LaPierre and guns. [HuffPost Live]

* University of Oregon Property professor doesn’t understand “property,” snatches student’s phone. Click through the jump to see more video of what happens when law professors and hippies clash! [Photography Is Not a Crime]

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I wasn’t trying to take no one’s house. I was just trying to take the property under adverse possession.

– Testimony given by David Cooper, a defendant who started squatting in a 4,320-square foot home Arlington, Texas, while the owner and his family were in Houston so his wife could get cancer treatments.

California bar, it's unforgettable, somebody pukes, most end on top.

As many of you already know, state bar exams start tomorrow. If you are taking the bar tomorrow, WHAT ARE YOU DOING READING ATL??

Just kidding. Relax. It’s gonna be what it’s gonna be.

To get you guys pumped up for the next two or three days, a reader sent us a clip of herself rapping property. If this Hastings student doesn’t make you psyched to take the bar, well, there’s probably never anybody in the history of ever who has been psyched about taking the California bar….

double red triangle arrows Continue reading “Rapping California Girl Giving You A Property Primer Before The Bar Exam”

I love it when this kind of thing happens. I’ve loved it ever since my very first day of Property class. I love it whenever anybody, anywhere in this country, seeks or gains title to something via adverse possession.

Every time it happens, it’s just tangible freaking proof that laws aren’t just a bunch of grand theories written in tomes that grow lonely from disuse. Adverse possession isn’t an existential contemplation, it’s a real-ass way that property can be transferred from those who are hoarding it to those who can use it.

And the fact that laypeople always freak out when confronted with this most basic of property concepts delights me to no end. Everybody loves private property in this country, but 200 million of them have no idea where it comes from. You’d think “fee simple” is something they would teach in middle school in a country like ours, but you need a graduate degree before people even try to teach you about real property.

I’m trying to say that the man who’s trying to get a $330,000 house for $16 bucks is a great American….

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