Rap

For sale. Contact me for details.

* What kind of a lawyer can’t spot a Nigerian scammer before being bilked out of millions? If you fell for that, please hit me up. I have a bridge I’d like to sell you. [Washington Post]

* Will Juliette Youngblood, the self-proclaimed “luckiest girl in the world,” still feel the same way if her claims against Irell & Manella and Morgan Chu are sent to binding arbitration? [Am Law Daily]

* The Game may face charges over an alleged tweet that prevented police from responding to five emergency calls in two hours. Only five? I guess that’s what happens when you’re straight outta Compton, where snitches get stitches. [CNN]

* With Senator Kevin de León hoping to regulate the use of fitted and flat hotel sheets, one thing’s for sure. California isn’t becoming a nanny state. It’s becoming a maid state. [Los Angeles Times]

* You know Chris Stewart has had one too many concussions when he’s still talking about finishing law school after his NFL career is over. [Wall Street Journal]

* I might be a bad little Jew for saying this, but matzoh isn’t worth $9.9B. It’s like eating cardboard. If you want special prison food, at least sue for something that tastes good. [New York Daily News]

Paul Oetken

* Ja Rule, another resident of Lat’s hometown, was sentenced to 28 months in jail, for failing to pay taxes. Rather than making some joke about him not being Always On Time with his tax payments, let’s instead just celebrate the existence of this hilarious picture. [Associated Press]

* J. Paul Oetken was confirmed to the S.D.N.Y. yesterday by the Senate, making him the first openly gay man appointed to the federal bench. I think it’s great that Chuck Grassley announced shortly before the vote that he would be supporting the nomination, but I also think it was unnecessary and offensive that he ended his announcement with “nohomo.” [Poliglot]

* Rupert Murdoch’s testifying before Parliament this morning which promises to be the Super Bowl for anglophile nerds. Will the old man survive? [Bloomberg]

* The News Corp. phone-hacking scandal has led to plenty of work for attorneys on “both sides of the pond.” This case is like the BP oil spill of dead girls’ phones being hacked. [Am Law Daily]

* Did Casey Anthony search for chloroform once or 84 times? The world is on tenterhooks, whatever that means. [New York Times]

* Another town clerk has resigned in New York due to gay marriages. The trials God is putting these people through remind me of the story of Gob. I think I spelled that right. [New York Post]

Tupac Shakur

Back when things were real, musicians didn’t get hurt jet skiing. They got shot. And if realness can be measured in bullet wounds, nobody was as real as rapper extraordinare and do-rag styling visionary Tupac Shakur, who was shot five times in 1994 and then again, fatally, in 1996.  None of the gunmen from either shooting have been identified. Until now.

On Wednesday, permanent resident of federal prison Dexter Isaac confessed to Tupac’s non-fatal 1994 shooting. In his confession, Isaac claims that Suge Knight-like music exec James “Henchman” Rosemond hired Isaac to commit the crime:

In 1994, James Rosemond hired me to rob 2Pac Shakur at the Quad Studio. He gave me $2,500, plus all the jewelry I took, except for one ring, which he wanted for himself. It was the biggest of the two diamond rings that we took. He said he wanted to put the stone in a new setting for his girlfriend at the time, Cynthia Ried. I still have as proof the chain that we took that night in the robbery.

If $2,500 seems low to you, you need to adjust for inflation ($3,765 in today’s dollars). In any event, why is Isaac ratting out Henchman after all these years, after the statute of limitations has run? Henchman, an FBI fugitive wanted for drug charges, recently told the press that Isaac was cooperating with authorities to build a case against him. In order to protect his good name and prove that he is under no circumstances a rat, convicted murderer Isaac is working closely with federal investigators to bring down Henchman. No word on whether Carmen Sandiego is on the case…

double red triangle arrows Continue reading “Fame Brief: Is This the Man Who Shot Tupac?”

* Dominique Strauss-Kahn will go to Rikers for three or four years just to prove his point. [CNN]

* A South Carolina jail is being investigated by the Justice Department for allowing its inmates to read only the Bible. Instead of a joke, how about you goofballs learn something and read this article that Christopher Hitchens wrote about the King James version of the not-quite-great book. [Charleston Post and Courier]

* Hide yo kilos, hide yo weed. Cause they searching errbody. [Los Angeles Times]

* Wisconsin Governor Scott Walker is not a fan of that state’s gay gross-up. “More like gross-out” he muttered, before kicking a teacher on food stamps. [Washington Post]

* Everything you didn’t know you wanted to know but were afraid you forgot to ask about the NFL lockout ruling from yesterday. [SI.com]

* King & Spalding continues to burnish its brand in the gay community through its work with the Houston Astros. ¿LOL Que? [Am Law Daily]

* “Dougie” rapper now movin’ like Bernie. Sorry… I had to. [NPR]

Chris Webby

As many of you figured out, the cease and desist letter from Chris Webby, claiming ownership of the hashtag #webby, was an April Fool’s hoax. This week’s sign that the apocalypse is upon was a hologram launched by the Webby Awards people. Here’s the official reveal.

Really, we thought a few more of our loyal readers would see through it. The firm that purportedly sent the letter, Baxter, Butler & Associates, doesn’t exist. This commenter got it. But I guess most commenters don’t fire up Google unless an attractive girl is involved.

You can see why the Webbys weren’t able to get a real law firm to participate in this prank. It might have been a joke today, but the first hashtag infringement suit is surely just around the corner.

Happy April Fool’s Day. I’m going to go back to drinking heavily now.

Earlier: Cease and Desist Letter of the Day: Who Owns Your Hashtag?

Chris Webby

If you enjoy the fact that a company called PeerViews apparently claims ownership of the term “Small Law,” you’re going to love this latest piece of IP ridiculousness.

Rapper Chris Webby has sent a cease and desist order to the Webby Awards. He wants them to stop using the hashtag, #webby.

I’m pretty sure that trademarking hashtags is one of the prerequisites for the Rapture.

And yes, of course Chris Webby made a video about his legal complaint…

double red triangle arrows Continue reading “Cease and Desist Letter of the Day: Who Owns Your Hashtag?”

Willie Nelson

* In Louisiana, girls must wear traditional dresses to the prom. Another tradition for girls in Louisiana is to marry your brother. Maybe traditions aren’t that great. [Daily Comet]

* Double bagging it: not just for skanky girls and groceries. A lawyer divulges the details of his love affair with plastic bags. [Wall Street Journal]

* Willie Nelson, it’s time to lip sync… for your life! The famous pot connoisseur will sing between tokes to avoid a jail sentence. [Daily Mail]

* If Eminem had one wish, he’d ask for a big enough ass for the whole world to kiss. Time to pucker up, record labels. [New York Times]

* Facebook Places is finally useful for something. Mark Zuckerberg: Told ya, Ceglia. – at Palo Alto, California with Domicile. [Reuters]

* Sean Penn finds himself wondering if time spent with Lindsay Lohan will count toward his community service requirement. [New York Post]

* Harvard lawyers, you so TTT. You can’t include your dog’s vet bill as an exhibit in a foreclosure case just because you’re covered in ivy. [Blog of Legal Times]

* Still more benchslappery, this time from the Second Circuit. Professor Nita Farahany wonders whether Judge Gary Sharpe “may have missed a few important days of his genetics class in high school or in college.” [Law and Biosciences Digest]

* In other federal judicial news: I’ve never bought into the silly claim that Clarence Thomas is the jurisprudential puppet of Antonin Scalia — and Linda Greenhouse’s analysis of the Term thus far confirms CT’s independence from AS. [Opinionator/ New York Times]

* The ability of judges to be funny: AFFIRMED. [Supreme Court of Washington Blog]

* Remember the crazy deposition dispute over the definition of “photocopying” (which we previously linked to)? Here’s some additional background. [Lowering the Bar]

* Lawyers who rap are a dime a dozen; lesbian lawyers who rap are more rare (and more interesting). Meet GW Law alum Amanda Carter, aka “330.” [DCist]

* In other D.C. news, congratulations to the four bloggers behind Who Murdered Robert Wone?, whose sleuthing efforts have just been honored. [Washington City Paper]

* The estate of the defunct Heller Ehrman firm is getting $20 million, courtesy of Bank of America and Citibank. That’s nice. [Am Law Daily]

Does this count as 'employed at graduation'?

This has not been a great weekend for the University of Pittsburgh community. As many of you know, the school’s college basketball team choked disappointed fans with an early round exit from the NCAA tournament.

You should always avoid comparing a school’s basketball team with its law school, but it appears that things aren’t going much better at the University of Pittsburgh School of Law. While there is some evidence that the legal economy is recovering, the improving fortunes have not trickled all the way down to 3Ls searching for work….

double red triangle arrows Continue reading “Leader in the Clubhouse for Worst Job of the Year”

In other words, my homegirl Kagan was saying people could not be aroused by the lyrics “’cause my dick’s on bone” or “me so horny, me f*** you long time.”

– Luther Campbell (aka Uncle Luke of 2 Live Crew) endorsing Elena Kagan in the Miami New Times based on her work on the band’s behalf at Williams & Connolly.

Page 5 of 6123456