Sex

These are just right for Hefner, Guccione & Flynt LLP.

* How high can your heels be for a job interview? [Corporette]

* If you think your client is committing securities fraud, the Supreme Court has good news! Sarbanes-Oxley’s anti-retaliation protection extends to Biglaw associates. [Whistleblower Protection Law Blog]

* Here’s more on today’s Chevron ruling from the perspective of the energy community. [Breaking Energy]

* The California Bar eJournal is running a poll asking the question, “Do you believe that the law school you attended prepared you to practice law?” The results may surprise you! (Shhh! No they won’t.) [Survey Monkey]

* An accused killer asks to withdraw his guilty plea by calmly explaining to the judge that he was high as a kite when he pleaded guilty and that his lawyer was busy boning the prosecutor. He earns an A for effort on that one. [Albany Times-Union]

* Chris Christie’s former campaign manager, Bill Stepien, appears to be the target of a federal investigation. It’s a bad time to be in Christie’s orbit. [Bergen County Record]

* Third time’s the charm! Kevyn Orr, Detroit’s Emergency Manager, is making his third bid to authorize a giveaway to the banks settle a massive derivatives deal that played a big role in Detroit’s financial woes. The judge overseeing the case rejected the prior proposals and may do the same again since the new deal grants UBS and Merrill Lynch a release from liability for the events surrounding a billion dollar deal. [Demos]

* Kerry Kennedy beat her DUI charge in no small part due to the testimony of the toxicology expert. [The Expert Institute]

* Police tried to hide their use of a cell phone tracker from the courts. Apparently the manufacturer asked them to. Oh well, if a corporation wants privacy violations kept quiet, that’s different. [ACLU]

* A follow-up from an oldie but goodie, the judge who changed a baby’s name from “Messiah” to “Martin” based on her personal religious beliefs received a public censure. Perhaps fittingly, the censure was less critical of changing “Messiah” than changing it to “Martin.” I mean, that’s just cruel. [Huffington Post]

* More on Mayer Brown’s uncomfortable lawsuit against a city for erecting a WWII memorial. [The Careerist]

* If you want male-strippers dressed as cops to come by the house, don’t call 911. [Legal Juice]

* These look like some fun Biglaw recruiting events over in England. Too bad if you’re not an Oxford or Cambridge student… [Legal Cheek]

* For the comic-loving lawyers out there, Marvel has kicked off a new run of the preeminent lawyer to the superheroes, She-Hulk. [Law and the Multiverse]

* How should we judge our prisons? Low incidence of rape and torture would be a good start. [The Volokh Conspiracy / Washington Post]

* You can’t use your failing company’s Facebook account to poach opportunities for your new company. [IT-Lex]

* More coverage of the tensions at UCLA Law School. [Huffington Post]

* University ordered to pay $2.5 million to former lawyer it fired for not rubber-stamping some questionable dealings. [Chronicle of Higher Education]

* Andi from this season’s The Bachelor has disappeared from the murder trial she was running in Atlanta to take over as next season’s Bachelorette. Maybe she won’t dumb herself down as much when she’s the star of the show. Video of her in court after the jump… [TMZ]

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Are porn stars’ rights deserving of strict scrutiny?

[W]hat I ask for is simple. I, like all other sex workers, want to be treated with dignity and respect. I want equal representation under the law and within societal institutions. I want people to acknowledge our humanity.

Lauren A., a freshman at Duke University, defending her decision to perform in pornography to fund her education. In her personal manifesto, posted on xoJane, she rejects her categorization as a “bimbo” and a “whore,” and envisions a world in which sex workers will enjoy the equal protection of the laws.


Who says she’s not a career woman? This is ‘Biglaw partner leaving Ken for her paralegal’ Barbie.

* With the impossible body ideal of Barbie gracing the Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Cover, perhaps we should consider the positives that Barbie has contributed to women over the years. Missing is the rare, vacuous “math class is tough” Barbie. [The Careerist]

* A five-year-old writes the cutest response to the IRS. [TaxProf Blog]

* Professor busted for taking upskirt pics. His defense? How else was he going to prove the girls weren’t wearing underwear? Touché. Touché. [The Smoking Gun]

* The reasons to quit your Biglaw job. Now in listicle form! [Buzzfeed]

* The Supreme Court has a chance to take a stand against prosecutorial misconduct. Will they take it? [The Atlantic]

* If you’re violating your probation, be sure to videotape it and post it on YouTube. There’s no way your probation officer will see it. [IT-Lex]

* More insight into the world of contracting and America’s emerging economic model. [Law and More]

* On April 11-12, 2014, the Marquette University Law School will hold a symposium entitled “Judicial Assistants or Junior Judges: the Hiring, Utilization and Influence of Law Clerks.” Our own David Lat will be there, along with such luminaries as Judge Posner, Judge Sykes, Joan Biskupic, and Tony Mauro. [Marquette University Law School]

* A Miami attorney is gearing up for legalized medical marijuana. He’s even selling franchises, hopefully called McKinebud’s. [Daily Business Review]

* Is Gwyneth cheating on Chris Martin with an entertainment lawyer? [Defamer]

* A Florida village has become a refuge to sex offenders because there’s nowhere else they can go. Isn’t this the plot of Arrested Development? [Agence France-Presse via Yahoo!]

* As if law schools aren’t charging enough, they also absolutely ravage students on casebook prices. It doesn’t have to be this way. [PrawfsBlawg]

* Who’d have thought it would be this hard to define a pig? [Modern Farmer]

* If you aren’t following DLA Piper’s boss Sir Nigel Knowles on Twitter, then… you’re lucky. [Legal Cheek]

* The vice president of the Constitutional Accountability Center weighs in on Judge Wright Allen’s marriage equality decision from the perspective of a gay, married Virginian. [Pilot Online]

* See, it’s not just lawyers who get annoyed when TV doesn’t live up to the realities of the profession. Political communications professionals can get pretty irked by House of Cards. [Ditto Public Affairs]

* A circuit judge just seized control of a lower court’s docket, setting restrictions on a judge’s ability to hear domestic violence cases after finding a repeated pattern of improperly blowing off these matters. It may be the Benchslap-Heard-Round-the-Nation since the slapped jurist is also the president-elect of the American Judges Association. [Detroit Free Press]

The children of lawyers often drift toward the arts. It’s a whole lot easier to pursue a passion for the theater when you have a privileged upbringing and the support it provides. Plus the kids have a front-row seat for how soul-crushing law can be, so they devote their efforts to staying as far away as possible.

Sometimes the children of lawyers go rogue and appear in Barely Legal.

The subject of this story is bridging the gap between the two. This legal all-star’s daughter is appearing fully nude in a play about an 18-year-old model for Barely Legal seeking a career in porn.

So whose daughter is working her acting assets? We have the answer (and access to some pictures too — fully nude, NSFW-style pictures). Don’t worry, you can click this jump without having your computer set off any alarms, but if you want to see risqué pics, we’ll give you an opportunity…

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The ABA Journal asks a holiday appropriate question this week: “Are you still with your law school sweetheart?”

I find the term “law school sweetheart” to be gross and vaguely unnatural. You don’t have “sweethearts” in law school. You have people who will bang you when you come back from the library wearing sweatpants, people who will save you a slice of pizza because you always forget to eat while at your clinic, and people you can sleep with after exams are over who won’t mind that you actually just want to sleep.

(And people who will give you hand jobs at school. Or maybe even more, as long as you ask nicely.)

But really, the question presented isn’t about the sad, “I’m too busy to put on heels to get laid” settlement negotiations that mark the start of most law school relationships. Instead, they’re asking whether these couplings have any legs once people get out into the real world….

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Well, it’s mid-February. You know what that means. It’s not just the sure-to-be-awkward ATL Valentine’s Day mixer. Stores are crammed with mid-level chocolate, Made-in-China teddy bears, and overpriced flowers. That can only mean one thing. Love, like the wintery mix the east coast is expecting, is in the air. This phenomena is so universal that even folks locked in a document review space for 60 hours a week are not immune.

In fact, it is even more prevalent in the isolated spaces of document review….

double red triangle arrows Continue reading “Finding Love In A Hopeless Place: Document Review”

* The Woody Allen-Mia Farrow custody findings were pretty damning. But for legal geeks, the important point is footnote 1, where the opinion shouts out then-clerk, now federal judge Analisa Torres for her role in drafting the opinion. [Huffington Post]

* Um… you shouldn’t do that with a sea anemone. [Air Force Court of Criminal Appeals]

* Judge Stanwood Duval presided over the criminal trial of a BP engineer arising from the BP oil spill. He forgot to mention that he was a plaintiff in a suit against BP arising from the BP oil spill. Oops.[New Orleans Times-Picayune]

* Maybe Harvard needs some new tax lawyers. [Chronicle of Higher Education]

* Apparently, the Brits aren’t too thorough with their background checks. A lawyer got exposed for lying about having two Harvard degrees. It only took bar authorities 9 years to figure it out. [Legal Cheek]

* Elie weighs in on the McGruff the crime dog story from last week. [ATL Redline]

* And part of the problem with the background check may start at the law school stage — the U.K. doesn’t consider criminal convictions for fraud in the U.S. as “relevant” for future practitioners of law. One tipster wonders if Stephen Glass should try his luck outside America? [New York Times]

* UNLV Professor Nancy Rapoport offers some mixed thoughts on the Santa Clara professor’s “Local Rules.” [Nancy Rapoport's Blogspot]

* Mathew Martoma’s conviction probably doesn’t mean all that much. Except to him, of course. For him it means some quality time in federal prison. [Dealbreaker]

* A guy who tried to get on the bench more than once was just busted in a prostitution sting. Oops. He also spells his name weird. [The Press Democrat]

* Tomorrow, Gibson Dunn partner Miguel Estrada will argue before the Second Circuit that private parties can’t get injunctions under RICO. For those keeping score, Gibson Dunn partner Randy Mastro hangs his whole case in Chevron v. Donziger on a request for an injunction under RICO. Time to play the Distinguish Polka. [Courthouse News]

* Wait until the RIAA realizes there are royalties to be made at CIA black sites in Uzbekistan. Because the only thing more torturous than being forced to listen to this music is the tenacity of the RIAA. [Slate]

* More on the legislative fight over accrual accounting versus cash-basis accounting for Biglaw firms. To the barricades! Swear your allegiance to Generalissimo MacEwen! [Adam Smith, Esq.]

* Is there a right to online anonymity? All the people out there trying to hire contract killers over the Internet certainly think so. [InsidePrivacy]

* Jay Edelson and Chandler Givens of Edelson PC examine the flawed law firm recruitment model. [Legal Solutions Blog / Thomson Reuters]

* Slip and falls at the IRS office. [Lowering the Bar]

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