Sexual Assault

Morning Docket: 11.08.11

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Sandusky realizes he's been sacked.

* “The most valuable assets of a law firm go home every night.” If only Biglaw firms realized that prior to dissolution, we’d probably have a lot more happy partners and associates. [WSJ Law Blog]

* If we can’t deregulate the legal profession, then what can we do to improve it? One law professor suggests reforming law schools. Gee, I think I’ve heard that somewhere before. [Washington Post]

* Penn State totally fumbled the Sandusky sexual assault allegations. In other news, the purported child abuser’s autobiography is called Touched. I don’t know if I should laugh or cry. [Bloomberg]

* Kitty Genovese’s killer has been denied parole for the fifteenth time. And he should keep getting denied for as long as bystander effect is taught in Psych 101 classes. [New York Law Journal]

* Justin Bieber plans to prove that he’s still a virgin not the baby daddy of Mariah Yeater’s child. If he’s right, he’s going to sue and hope for one less lonely girl in his life. [New York Daily News]

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Morning Docket: 10.28.11

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Alas, Vince Young couldn't make this happen.

* Ira Schacter’s lawyer on his client’s propensity to give out rings worth more than $200K: “He’s just a generous guy.” No, he’s just a Biglaw partner. [The Careerist]

* From Russia Israel with Love: Emory Law student Ilan Grapel has been released from Egypt and will be arriving back in the U.S. today. Welcome home! [New York Times]

* A guy was convicted of selling black market kidneys? I thought that only happened in urban legends, but apparently it happens in good old Jersey. [Bloomberg]

* Next time you want to hold porn auditions at your house, make sure you have the girls sign all of the necessary release forms before you drug and assault them. [Miami Herald]

* How dare you prevent Vince Young from making it rain and then sue him over it! When a man asks you to give him $8,000 in one dollar bills at a strip club, you do it. [New York Post]

21 Comments

Morning Docket: 09.07.11

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Beata Boman: See what I mean?

* Sprint hopped in bed with Skadden to sue AT&T over its proposed merger with T-Mobile. Somewhere in America, the Verizon guy is cackling with glee. “Can you hear me now, b*tches?” [Bloomberg]

* “I would love to dominate and humiliate and degrade you, privately of course.” Remember this guy? Six of the nine charges against attorney Robert Hoffman have been dismissed. [ABA Journal]

* Another sport, another months-long lockout. NBA owners and players better make a deal soon, or else this year’s basketball season is going to get benched. [New York Daily News]

* Utah wants to throw out the Sister Wives bigamy suit because no one really cares about polygamy except television viewers. Lawsuits are great for Nielsen ratings, though. [Deseret News]

* Ah, the strange anatomy of a privacy lawsuit settlement. Next time you decide to take naked pictures, make sure your laptop didn’t fall off the back of a truck before saving them. [ABC News]

* Socialite Beata Boman got a great deal on her larceny charges. She stole a scarf, but she probably should’ve stole a blazer that fit her massive boobs, instead. [New York Post]

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Quote of the Day: The Joys of Being a Partner?

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I would love to dominate and humiliate and degrade you, privately of course.

— Robert Hoffman, a lawyer in California, in an alleged expression of his sexual desires on the “Casual Encounters” section of Craigslist.

(Hoffman has been charged with rape, forced oral copulation, and sexual battery. His lawyer, Stuart Hanlon, claims that a videotape of one of the encounters exists and may exonerate his client.)

26 Comments

Batter Up, Twinkle Toes: Lenny Dykstra’s Latest Brush with the Law

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Lenny Dykstra

Lenny Dykstra was once a famous for being a scrappy center fielder for the Mets and the Phillies. Now he’s more famous for taking the same scrappy approach with the law. In January, Dykstra was accused of sexual assault by his housekeeper. In May, Dykstra was indicted for bankruptcy fraud. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.

No charges were brought against the former ball player for sexual assault earlier in the year. In fact, Dykstra cracked jokes about the accusation, quipping: “If she was assaulted on Saturdays, I’m a ballerina dancer on Sundays.” But now it’s time for this twinkle toes to batter up, because apparently Dykstra really likes his housekeepers.

I’m starting to notice a trend here with men and their illicit love for housekeepers. So, what has Nails been nailed with now?

Read more at Dealbreaker….

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Morning Docket: 08.11.11

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Aaron Tobey

* A judge will soon rule in the Aaron Tobey case. If you don’t remember, he’s the kid who stripped at the airport to protest the TSA. Because that wasn’t going to cause a scene. [Washington Post]

* Diallo plans to introduce evidence of DSK’s alleged global history of sexual assaults at trial. The man’s got money — he can’t help it if he’s got hoes in different area codes. [Thomson Reuters]

* And speaking of hoes, if you’re convicted of soliciting backdoor deals in Louisiana, you’ll have to register as a sex offender. Is that constitutional? [Beaumont Enterprise]

* Louboutin is seeing red after losing to YSL. I guess I can stop hoping to own a pair of Louboutins, since everyone and their mother will have red-soled shoes in the future. [Hollywood Reporter]

Warren Jeffs

* Zàijiàn, Aggarwal! K&L Gates is suing a former partner, Navin Kumar Aggarwal, for breach of trust after he was arrested for theft and forgery. [Bloomberg]

* Widener Law Professor Lawrence Connell will be suing the school for $1.8M over a psych evaluation. He must be crazy for daring to defend himself in an email to students. [NBC Philadelphia]

* God gave him life, and so did the jury. Poor Warren Jeffs must be bored in jail. This polygamist pedo has been beating the bishop up to 15 times a day. Ouch. [The Daily]

34 Comments

Victim of Sexual Assault Tries To Drag Match.com Down A Slippery Slope

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Would new Match.com regulations stop Ben Roethlisberger from connecting with a receiver?

By now, many of you have see the story about the woman who is suing Match.com. It’s been in the L.A. Times, the WSJ Law Blog (replete with a very creepy picture), and the ABA Journal. It’s a sad story. A woman alleges she was sexually assaulted while on a date with a man she met through Match.com.

If the allegations are true, you can only hope her attacker is punished to the full extent of the law.

This story is making national news because, in addition to pursuing charges against her alleged attacker, the woman has also filed a lawsuit against Match.com. She wants them to conduct a screening of the users on their site.

In the heat of a disturbing story about an assault, I’m sure that checking a member’s name against a registry of sex offenders seems like a minimal requirement that can be easily done by a large company like Match.com. At least that’s what her lawyer would like us to think.

But I think any dispassionate and reasonable analysis of the situation would reveal that such a requirement is at worst dangerous, and a best entirely ineffective. I don’t care how many proprietary algorithms these dating sites throw at you — at the end of the day, there is no substitute for human intuition, common sense, and luck….

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Ex-Biglaw Bad Boys Accused of Sexual Assault:
Where Are They Now?

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Stephan Addison (left) and Benjamin Butler (right)

We like to provide updates on lawyers we’ve covered in the past, just to close the loop and keep readers informed. For example, if a lawyer is accused of wrongdoing, we cover the allegations, and then the charges are dropped, we’d like to write about the clearing of that person’s name. (If you’re aware of such a situation, please email us.)

Sometimes attorneys are punished rather than exonerated, however. Today we bring you news about the Illinois bar’s disciplining of Stephan Addison and Benjamin Butler, both 2004 graduates of the University of Wisconsin Law School, whom we first wrote about back in 2007. The two were once associates at large law firms — Addison at Seyfarth Shaw, and Butler at Schiff Hardin. They left their firms after being accused of sexual assault, after a drunken three-way hook-up that went very, very wrong.

So what are they up to now?

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Where Are They Now?”

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