Thomas M. Cooley Law School

* When it comes to bans on same-sex marriage, for Justice Anthony Kennedy, animus is a “doctrinal silver bullet” — the fact that there was no animus involved in the enactment of many of them may be problematic at the high court. [New York Times]

* Relying on some obscure Supreme Court precedent, the Fifth Circuit saved Mississippi’s lone abortion clinic after striking down as unconstitutional a state law that would have required doctors to have hospital admitting privileges. [National Law Journal]

* Given the situation over at Bingham McCutchen, people are starting to wonder about whether all the guaranteed contracts to members of merger partner McKee Nelson’s partnership helped to shape the firm’s current financial plight. [Am Law Daily]

* Hot on the heels of Cooley Law canceling its first-year class at Ann Arbor and announcing tentative plans to close the campus, the ABA approved the school’s affiliation with Western Michigan. Yay? [MLive.com]

* Here’s one way to become a lawyer without racking up massive amounts of debt: you could try to “read” the law like Abraham Lincoln, and work as a law firm apprentice. That sounds delightful. [New York Times]

Earlier this month, we were the first to break the news that due to continuing declines in both enrollment and revenue, Cooley Law School — a five-campus empire that’s regarded by some as one of the worst schools in the nation — would not only be conducting faculty and staff layoffs, but would also stop accepting first-year students at its Ann Arbor campus. At the time, a member of Cooley’s administration said there were no present plans to phase out the Ann Arbor campus.

Alas, it looks like those plans may have changed.

Will Cooley Law be one of the first schools to succumb to the the pressures of the new normal and close down an entire satellite campus?

Please note the update at the bottom of this post.

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Lindsay Lohan

* Law firm mergers are on a record-setting pace, with 39 thus far in 2014. Just one “megamerger” was announced in the second quarter (Patton Boggs / Squire Sanders), but hey, we still have half the year ahead of us. [Am Law Daily]

* It hasn’t been a good week for the Thomas M. Cooley Law School. In addition to all of its enrollment woes, the Sixth Circuit affirmed the dismissal of its defamation suit against Team Strauss/Anziska. [National Law Journal]

* The doctors who spent the month of June evaluating Oscar Pistorius’s mental health found that he was depressed and posed a potential suicide risk. You’d feel the same if you were facing jail time. [CNN]

* Walgreens will give $180,000 to an ex-employee with diabetes as a settlement after the store fired her for eating a $1.39 bag of chips before paying to fend off a low blood sugar attack. [San Francisco Chronicle]

* Lindsay Lohan is suing Rockstar Games over an alleged character likeness in Grand Theft Auto V. To be fair, the character does kind of look like LiLo circa her “Mean Girls” days. [International Business Times]

Get out while you still can!

If you’ve managed to jump onto the speeding “now is a great time to apply to law school” train, then you might want to fling yourself from the tracks, because that thing is about to derail. We’ve got some major news from a law school that’s stereotypically regarded as one of the worst in the country. If you thought things were bad for law schools, you ain’t seen nothing yet.

The legal academy has been waiting with bated breath for something like this to happen, and now it finally has. A law school is cutting an entire class year from its enrollment logs at one campus and laying off faculty and staff — all at the same time.

Which law school seems to be in full on disaster mode right now?

double red triangle arrows Continue reading “Much Maligned Law School Cuts First-Year Class, Announces Layoffs”

* You may have missed this because you were busy lamenting yesterday’s Supreme Court decisions, so here are just a few of the high-profile cases for which the high court refused to grant cert. [WSJ Law Blog]

* A judge tossed a defamation suit filed against Cooley Law by the original law school litigation dream team. That’s too bad, it would’ve been interesting watch the trial. [National Law Journal]

* George Zimmerman lost his defamation suit against NBC. As it turns out, the network didn’t need to edit those phone calls to make it seem like the acquitted artist was racist. [Chicago Tribune]

* Listen, if you really feel like you need include an addendum to your law school application, you should try not to use too much flowery bullshit to explain away each of your misdoings and missteps. [Law Admissions Lowdown / U.S News & World Report]

* Unfortunately, things aren’t exactly getting much better for women in Silicon Valley. A former vice president over at Tinder alleges that the company’s CEO called her a “whore” at a party. Eww! [Reuters]

Sometimes students who enroll in law school very quickly realize that it’s not the right career path for them. Rather than lay out additional loan dollars, they happily withdraw from school and frolic to their next destination. Others “withdraw,” forget that lawyers want important decisions recorded in writing, and wind up accidentally failing out of law school. When they decide that they want to go back to school, this obviously causes problems.

In the case we’ll be discussing today, the former law student happened to file suit against the law school he once attended. He apparently decided that he really did want to be a lawyer, seven years after he initially quit. Alas, he needs a letter of good standing to apply to the school of his choice, and his old school won’t supply him with one.

Did we mention that he wants a letter of good standing so he can apply to Cooley Law?

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* Remember when I said it was a bad idea to drop off a drunk in Ireland? This is EXACTLY why. [The Independent (Dublin)]

* Oh, Cooley Law School… don’t ever change. [The Faculty Lounge]

* Republican tort-reform advocate settles overblown personal injury suit. Oh the irony. [The Hutchinson News]

* Check that, this is even more ironic. [The Chronicle of Higher Education]

* The U.S. Postal Service helped kill an innovative, anti-junk-mail startup. You could say a bloated government agency is to blame. Or you could say cutting off the Post Office and forcing them to fund themselves through Faustian deals with junk mail distributors is to blame. Either way, a great idea was smothered. [Inside Sources]

* Indicted former Virginia Governor and transvaginal ultrasound enthusiast Bob McDonnell has taken a gig as a visiting professor at an ATL Worst Law School finalist, Liberty Law. Of course. [The News & Advance (Lynchburg)]

* Do you need to be on a law journal to succeed? [Huffington Post]

* Can you get paid for sleeping on the job? Good question. [The Spitz Law Firm]

The cold call is miffed
and there you are
you’re squirming for your life
you’re a falling star
And all the years
no one knows
just how hard you worked
because you’re Tier Four…
One Shining Moment, your debt’s piling up
One Shining Moment, your career’s frozen in time

It’s over. After 5 rounds of voting, we finally have a champion in the ATL March Madness tournament. Thanks to your voting, we can crown the Worst Law School in America. The championship featured 1-seeded Thomas M. Cooley against 8-seeded Liberty.

Did this tournament end in an upset?

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If you had the correct Final Four in the NCAA Basketball Tournament, then congratulations… you’re a UConn fan. Or at least someone who pays so little attention to basketball that you picked UConn because you remember when the team was a juggernaut sometime in the past.

The ATL March Madness bracket also has an underdog rolling along. Is Liberty a school of destiny?

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Remember when George Mason made a run to the Final Four? Or when VCU climbed out of the play-in game to make it into the Final Four? Quick aside, are you tired of the CBS commentators pushing the whole “it’s not a play-in game, it’s the First Round” on us? It’s like CBS hired the inventor of the Cooley Rankings idea.

Anyway, like those exciting, underdog-dominated tournaments, it looks like we’ve got a bottom-seeded team charging all the way into the Elite Eight in our humble ATL bracket. How crazy is that?

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