Twittering

* I include this line not to highlight the horribleness of zoos, but because I’m doing NS today and this contains a fun anecdote about walrus masturbation. [Cracked] * Meanwhile, on Redline, I’m like, doing stuff. [ATL: Redline] * “I really want to go to law school to study international law and be a part of solving problems like what’s going on in Crimea right now.” — Dumb idiot who will wish he read Above the Law before he went to law school. [Radio Free Europe] * Student gets punished for sending a tweet from home. Should it really matter where you are sitting when you hit the button on the tweet calling your principal a “pussy ass bitch”? [It-Lex] * I think the jurors on the Bernie Madoff co-conspirator case might be running a Ponzi scheme. [Dealbreaker] * Everyone is overwhelmed, apparently. [Going Concern] * Scalia apparently comes up with his s**t while dozing off to sleep. So, literally now, Scalia’s dreams are the stuff of my nightmares. [Military.com]

Highlights from live commentary on the ATL blogger conference

Who just dethroned the Harvard Law Review as the nation's #1 law journal?

Do you use Facebook for business? A court will have to decide.

* A Miami attorney is gearing up for legalized medical marijuana. He’s even selling franchises, hopefully called McKinebud’s. [Daily Business Review] * Is Gwyneth cheating on Chris Martin with an entertainment lawyer? [Defamer] * A Florida village has become a refuge to sex offenders because there’s nowhere else they can go. Isn’t this the plot of Arrested Development? [Agence France-Presse via Yahoo!] * As if law schools aren’t charging enough, they also absolutely ravage students on casebook prices. It doesn’t have to be this way. [PrawfsBlawg] * Who’d have thought it would be this hard to define a pig? [Modern Farmer] * If you aren’t following DLA Piper’s boss Sir Nigel Knowles on Twitter, then… you’re lucky. [Legal Cheek] * The vice president of the Constitutional Accountability Center weighs in on Judge Wright Allen’s marriage equality decision from the perspective of a gay, married Virginian. [Pilot Online] * See, it’s not just lawyers who get annoyed when TV doesn’t live up to the realities of the profession. Political communications professionals can get pretty irked by House of Cards. [Ditto Public Affairs] * A circuit judge just seized control of a lower court’s docket, setting restrictions on a judge’s ability to hear domestic violence cases after finding a repeated pattern of improperly blowing off these matters. It may be the Benchslap-Heard-Round-the-Nation since the slapped jurist is also the president-elect of the American Judges Association. [Detroit Free Press]

You're under investigation for bullying, stupid. Now is not the time to get smart with a law firm.

How is technology shaping the world in which we live, affecting legal and illegal activities alike? Some thoughts from Jason Thomas of Thomson Reuters.

Here are three ways to use social media to get the most out of traditional, in-person networking, and to create new opportunities.

The Social Law Firm Index: a review of the Am Law 50's use of social media in the areas of reach, engagement, and owned media.

* Parties in Utah’s gay marriage case are boosting their legal backbones. Utah picked up Gene Schaerr, of Winston & Strawn, who is leaving the firm to serve as lead outside counsel. [WSJ Law Blog (sub. req.)]

* New Jersey Gov. Chris Christie called upon Randy Mastro of Gibson Dunn to assist with Bridgegate’s fallout. Because messing with people’s commutes into New York City is that big of a deal. [Am Law Daily]

* Come next year, Yale Law School will be joining the majority of law schools located on this planet by holding its fall finals before winter break. They’ll still be studying anyway… just for fun! [Yale Daily News]

* “Being in Portland … is hard to facilitate when you are based in Eugene.” Oregon Law, sadly unable to master the fine art of teleportation, will allow students to take their 3L classes in Portland as soon as in 2015. [National Law Journal]

* Courtney Love was in court this week testifying in the first “Twibel” (Twitter + libel) trial in the nation. Oh, that’s so interesting, but what America really wants to know is what she was wearing. [Businessweek]

Which "out of control" celebrity just got super-snarky in responding to a cease and desist letter?

Will the Florida Bar succeed in its ethics inquiry against Mark O'Mara?

Why are law firms putting effort into social media, and how well are they doing?

* Let’s get ready to rumble! Senate Democrats are threatening to go “nuclear” on existing filibuster rules if Senate Republicans decide to band together to block Patricia Millett’s nomination to the D.C. Circuit. [New York Times]

* AMR Corp. and US Airways are reportedly trying to broker a deal with the Department of Justice that would allow the airlines’ merger to go through. And this is the room full of people who care. [Wall Street Journal (sub. req.)]

* Proskauer Rose and the zombie corpse of Dewey & LeBoeuf received a Halloween treat from Judge Martin Glenn in the MF Global case. The firms will each be receiving a combined $9 million for their work. [Am Law Daily]

* Twitter is facing a $125 million fraud suit filed by two financial firms claiming that the social media giant had them organize a private sale of shares and then canceled it. #OhShiat #LawyerUp [Businessweek]

* Jill Bjorkholm Easter, the lawyer accused of planting drugs on a PTA volunteer at her son’s school, has pleaded guilty to false imprisonment. Her hubby’s trial is next week. [L.A. Now / Los Angeles Times]

* She’s got the right to remain topless: Holly Van Voast, the photographer famous for roaming the streets of New York with breasts bared, settled a lawsuit against the city for $40,000. [New York Daily News]

* “Ed,” the anonymous editor of the defunct Blawg Review site, RIP. [Trial Warrior Blog; Simple Justice]

* President Obama defends Obamacare (aka the Affordable Care Act), saying that the dysfunctional HealthCare.gov website will get fixed. [Washington Post]

* “Calling All Unemployed Law Grads: Greenberg Traurig Is Hiring.” But there’s a catch. We’ll have more on this later today. [Am Law Daily (sub. req.)]

* The Supreme Court agrees to hear a case regarding how to determine mental disability in death-penalty cases. [National Law Journal]

* If you’re thinking of selling legal services over Groupon, proceed with care. [ABA via WSJ Law Blog]

* Want to get out of jury duty? Try flipping the bird at the defendant. [ABA Journal]

* Chris Geidner takes a closer look at Chris Christie’s decision not to keep fighting marriage equality in New Jersey. Is it all about 2016? [BuzzFeed]

* More details on the circumstances surrounding a Reed Smith partner’s profane and ill-advised tweet. Expect Steven Regan to be sent back to “Tweet School.” [Am Law Daily (sub. req.)]

* A high school teacher admits to taking heroin before teaching. But it was art class, so if he wasn’t on something it would have seemed weird. [Daily Mail] * Reed Smith issued a statement on the complete meltdown one of its partners had over Twitter. They did not go ahead and tell the partner to “go f@ck himself and die,” so that’s a start. [Roll on Friday] * Man fleeing police threw a parrot at the police officer to slow him down. The parrot bit the cop. Polly wants some bacon. [The Smoking Gun] * Anyone read through the new Google Terms of Service? Well, they’re going to start using your name and profile in sharing your endorsements of music and restaurants. Here’s how you can opt out if you don’t want people to know how much you love Ace of Base. [Electronic Frontier Foundation] * A veteran news reporter is suing the L.A. Times for discrimination after he was fired for not “taking it easy” on former Dodgers owner Frank McCourt. The only person who went less easy on Frank McCourt was the former Mrs. McCourt’s lawyer. [Courthouse News Service] * A financial trader is suing his lawyer brother because he lost a bunch of money investing in real estate from 2004 through 2007. It seems like something more significant might have happened to real estate around 2007. But hey, congrats financial traders! You’re officially worse than lawyers. [Daily Business Review] * If reviews and endorsements aren’t honest, they undermine the entire process. [Associate's Mind] * 13 Signs You’re a Law Student. [Thought Catalog] * The House stenographer loses it during the shutdown debate. Have any court reporters done the same? [Chaos in the Courtroom] * Matthew Berry and Nate Ravitz of ESPN give an Illinois law student a hard time. The discussion begins at the 34:00 mark. And then they start making fun of the school’s ranking at the 39:00 mark. [ESPN]

This guy must have been really, really pissed off about something...

* Referees go on a power trip and get arrested. [Legal Juice] * Lawyers enjoy LinkedIn. They may not like it as much if these allegations are true. [IT-Lex] * A New York lawyer is using Twitter to complain about Obamacare. This is what happens when there aren’t enough billable hours to go around. [New York Post] * TSA lets 9-year-old through without a ticket or adult help. Our security is top-notch in this country. [Lowering the Bar] * New York attorney Bradley Dizik is the working to save Detroit’s Masonic temple from its financial woes. How screwed is Detroit? Even the international Freemason conspiracy can’t help. [Detroit News] * Interested in national security — and getting CLE credit? [Lawfare] * A Georgetown Law student was killed over the weekend. On a personal note, I knew Mark and he was truly great guy and my thoughts go out to his family and friends. [Washington Post]

* Profiling the new talent appearing before the Supreme Court this term. Honestly, I can’t get excited about oral arguments that don’t involve the Ninth Circuit cracking one-liners anymore. [The Volokh Conspiracy] * The Montana man sentenced to 30 days in jail for raping a 14-year-old is out. I wonder if he can make it on the outside after being institutionalized for a whole month. [CNN] * As we predicted, political battles have exhausted the budget of federal defenders programs. At least in Ohio there’s a guy willing to bend the laws of time and space to represent indigent clients. [Federal Times] * Keith Lee of Associate’s Mind has a new book out, The Marble and the Sculptor: From Law School to Law Practice (affiliate link). The image of The Thinker on the cover is appropriate: most law school grads these days do just sit there wondering how to get jobs. [Associate's Mind] * Maryland gubernatorial campaign promising to build another law school. Newsflash: Ray Lewis has retired! You don’t need more lawyers! [Baltimore Sun] * The Daily Beast’s Josh Rogin mocked a stand-up act over Twitter last night. He was punched in the face for his efforts. The comic was arrested. Punching Rogin for criticizing the act was uncalled for. Punching Rogin for working for the Daily Beast on the other hand… [IT-Lex] * Marissa Alexander, the Florida woman sentenced to 20 years for firing a warning shot at an abusive husband, is getting a new trial. Since George Zimmerman got a decorative fruit basket for actually killing someone a few miles away, Alexander has to like her chances. [First Coast News]

Watch your hemlines, ladies, or else you could be looking at some discipline from the Bar.