Violence
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Attorney Misconduct, Crime, Drinking, Litigatrix, Violence
'Apparently Intoxicated' Prosecutor Allegedly Takes a Literal Bite Out of Crime at an Adult Store
The hangover is going to be that much worse for a prosecutor who has become the prosecutee... -
Crime, Lawyer of the Day, Violence
Lawyer of the Day: It's Merely A Flesh Wound
This Chicago prosecutor saved the day, but took a beating in the process. - Sponsored
Legal AI: 3 Steps Law Firms Should Take Now
If 2023 introduced legal professionals to generative AI, then 2024 will be when law firms start adapting to utilize it. Things are moving fast, so… -
Biglaw, Crime, In-House Counsel, Violence
This Former Skadden Associate's Alleged Weapon of Choice? A Broken Champagne Flute
Does this former Skaddenite deserve a 25-year sentence for his alleged crimes?
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Biglaw, Crime, Department of Justice, Election 2012, Election Law, Gay Marriage, Law School Deans, Morning Docket, Partner Issues, Partner Profits, SCOTUS, Supreme Court, Violence
Morning Docket: 09.25.12
* Will the members of the Supreme Court announce which gay marriage issues they’ll be hearing this term any time soon? With Proppsition 8 appeal and several DOMA appeals on hand, there’s certainly a lot for them to choose from. [CNN]
* It’s beginning to look a lot like Biglaw, everywhere you go: lawyers are miserable, clients are unhappy, and apparently profits per partner are all to blame. Gee, thanks for those rankings, Am Law, they were really helpful. [DealBook / New York Times]
* Instead of arguing over font size, the Department of Justice argued law yesterday during closing arguments in its attempts to convince a three-judge panel to strike down South Carolina’s voter ID statute. [National Law Journal]
* Unlike Elizabeth Warren, he’s no “Fauxcahontas”: Kevin Washburn, the dean of the University of New Mexico Law School, has been confirmed by the Senate to oversee the Bureau of Indian Affairs. [Washington Post]
* If you’re going to allegedly slash someone’s face in an attempt to defend your honor, at least do it with class like this Columbia Law grad, and use a broken champagne flute as your weapon of choice. [New York Post]
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Drinking, Lawyer of the Day, Violence
Lawyer of the Day: Assaulted By Red Bull And Vodka?
Were Red Bull and vodka indirectly responsible for a lawyer's loss of his finger? -
Divorce Train Wrecks, Husch Blackwell, Nude Dancing, Small Law Firms, Texas, Violence
Lawyers Survive With A Little Help From Their Friends -- In The FBI
These lawyers inadvertently angered the wrong people -- and barely escaped alive. -
Crime, Deaths, Education / Schools, Violence
Following Student's Hazing Death, University Officials Argue Protecting Students Off Campus Isn't Their Job
Should Florida A&M be held responsible for a student's death that resulted from a marching band hazing ritual? -
Crime, Drinking, Lawyer of the Day, Litigatrix, Violence
Lawyer of the Day: Literally Fighting for Her Right to Party
A young prosecutor allegedly got into a drunken fight with Atlanta police.... uh-oh. - Sponsored
Early Adopters Of Legal AI Gaining Competitive Edge In Marketplace
How to best leverage generative AI as an early adopter with ethical use. -
Antitrust, Biglaw, Canada, Crime, Facebook, Federal Judges, FTC, Law Schools, Morning Docket, Perverts, Romance and Dating, Ursula Ungaro, Violence
Morning Docket: 08.23.12
* Little known fact of the day: the late comedienne Phyllis Diller apparently had a storybook romance with Paul Hastings name partner, Robert Hastings. She once said that her longtime Biglaw beau was the “love of [her] life.” [Am Law Daily]
* The Federal Trade Commission has closed its antitrust review of Facebook’s proposed Instagram purchase, clearing the way for the social networking site’s users to post grainy pictures to their hearts’ content. [Bloomberg]
* A former Vancouver lawyer serving a 15-year sentence for money laundering claims that one of the Mounties who investigated his case played a game of “hide the Canadian bacon” with Judge Ursula Ungaro. [Province]
* A judge who resigned in April has been retroactively removed from office for admitting to having sexual contact with his five-year-old niece. He presided over family court matters. Figures. [New York Law Journal]
* Which accomplishments and activities should you leave off your résumé? A) law review editor in chief; B) second in the class; C) 4.05 GPA; D) nonprofit executive director; E) child porn aficionado. [Willamette Week]
* Stabbing your lawyer is so last season. Another criminal defendant reportedly attacked his defense attorney in court, but this time chose to whack his own counsel in the head with his handcuffed hand. [Boston Globe]
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6th Circuit, Biglaw, Crime, Football, Guns / Firearms, Law Professors, Law Schools, Media and Journalism, Morning Docket, Police, Religion, Sentencing Law, Twittering, Violence
Morning Docket: 08.08.12
* The Sixth Circuit delved into the question of law professors’ tenure in a recent decision, noting that it doesn’t guarantee a job for life. But seriously, why on earth would you want to have a lifetime career at Cooley Law anyway? [National Law Journal]
* Was the Wisconsin Sikh temple shooting a hate crime? Well, the shooter was in a racist skinhead band and purchased supplies from a neo-Nazi group, if that gives you a clue. [Reuters]
* Bet nobody saw this kind of douchebaggery happening: Jackson Lewis has been tapped to represent a member of Penn State’s board of trustees to appeal the NCAA’s unappealable sanctions, and he’s recruiting fellow trustees to join him. [Am Law Daily]
* No more “no comment” for this former reporter: Bruce Brown, a partner at Baker Hostetler, was appointed as the new executive director of the Reporters Committee for Freedom of the Press. [Blog of Legal Times]
* As expected, Jared Lee Loughner pleaded guilty in the Arizona shooting that killed six people and wounded 13 others. He’ll likely receive several life sentences as opposed to the death penalty. [Wall Street Journal]
* “This sh*t ain’t no joke yo, I’m serious, people are gonna die like Aurora.” Twitter, please cooperate so the police don’t have to subpoena you when a user threatens to commit a massacre in NYC. [NBC New York]
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American Bar Association / ABA, Biglaw, Cass Sunstein, Drugs, Fast Food, Gay Marriage, Guns / Firearms, Law Professors, Law Schools, Military / Military Law, Morning Docket, Sam Sparks, Sports, Student Loans, Ted Frank, UVA Law, Violence
Morning Docket: 08.06.12
* From the White House to the ivory tower: Cass Sunstein is leaving OIRA to return to Harvard Law. Perhaps his thoughts on behavioral economics and public policy will be appreciated in academia. [New York Times]
* It’s too late to apologize this time, Cesar. Greenberg Traurig has been sanctioned in the TD Bank to-do for the firm’s negligent failure to bring forth documents during discovery. [Tampa Bay Business Journal]
* Jared Loughner is reportedly set to plead guilty in the Arizona shooting attack that killed six people, including Judge John Roll, and injured 13, including former Representative Gabrielle Giffords. [Los Angeles Times]
* Lance Armstrong is going for the gold against the U.S. Anti-Doping Agency, this time with a bid to Judge Sam Sparks for a restraining order blocking the USADA from forcing the cyclist into binding arbitration. [Bloomberg]
* “[T]his is not the time for us to become an international accrediting agency.” The ABA will remain a faulty U.S. accrediting agency, because the Legal Ed Section voted against accrediting foreign law schools. [ABA Journal]
* Apparently Texas Tech Law has more than beauty queens. Secretary of Defense Leon Panetta has appointed dean emeritus and current law professor Walter Huffman to the new Defense Legal Policy Board. [KCBD 11]
* Remember Joshua Gomes, the UVA Law student who allegedly broke into the school’s registrar office? As it turns out, there’s no more “allegedly” about it. We’ll likely have more on this news later today. [Daily Progress]
* Law school graduates’ tales of woe are still making headlines in newspapers. Please take heed, 0Ls, and remember that you decided to discount this info if you’re told that you “should have known better.” [Oregonian]
* If you want to eat mor chikin but the thought of supporting Chick-fil-A’s stance on gay marriage is giving you indigestion, now you can eat your fill with the assistance of Ted Frank’s chicken offsets. [Huffington Post]
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Guns / Firearms, Murder, Violence
Could The University Of Colorado Face Civil Liability Over the Aurora Movie Theater Shooting?
Who could face liability in the wake of the Aurora movie theater shooting? -
Crime, Guns / Firearms, Law Schools, Police, Violence
Florida State 3L Allegedly Shoots Florida State 2L
A Florida State 3L stands accused in the shooting of a Florida State 2L.
Sponsored
Legal AI: 3 Steps Law Firms Should Take Now
Early Adopters Of Legal AI Gaining Competitive Edge In Marketplace
The Business Case For AI At Your Law Firm
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Is The Future Of Law Distributed? Lessons From The Tech Adoption Curve
Navigating Financial Success by Avoiding Common Pitfalls and Maximizing Firm Performance
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Crime, Free Speech, Gay, Gay Marriage, India, Labor / Employment, Morning Docket, Murder, Violence
Morning Docket: 07.31.12
* Jason Cai, the software engineer convicted in the spring of murdering a young attorney, was sentenced today to life in prison without parole and ordered to pay more than $700,000 to the slain woman’s family. [Mercury News]
* An appeals court revived a discrimination lawsuit filed by a woman against her employer. And nobody cares. Wait, hold on a sec. Her employer is the Equal Employment Opportunity Commission. What, what, whaaaat? [WSJ Law Blog]
* James Holmes, the man accused of last week’s movie theater shooting spree, has been formally charged with 142 criminal counts. They include 24 counts of first-degree murder and 116 counts of attempted murder in the first degree. [Courthouse News Service]
* The Twinkie defense is so played out. Now, courtesy of an ex-Citigroup employee, introducing the brand spanking new “Where’s Waldo” defense. [Reuters]
* India’s largest and oldest television network has accused Nielsen of violating the FCPA by manipulating viewership data in favor of networks that offer bribes. Say it ain’t so! [Hollywood Reporter]
* Chick-fil-A, free speech, zoning laws, and homophobia — all thrown together onto a failure pile in a sadness bowl. Noted First Amendment lawyer Marc Randazza, counsel to ATL, takes to CNN to educate the masses. [CNN]
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Animal Law, Bar Exams, Deaths, Pets, Violence
Dead Cat Mars Usually Lovely Albany Bar Exam Experience
You weren't hallucinating, somebody really did kill a cat outside of the bar exam... -
Cars, Death Penalty, Depositions, Drinking, Guns / Firearms, Kids, Murder, Non-Sequiturs, Paralegals, Police, Sex, Television, Violence
Non-Sequiturs: 07.24.12
* Will consultation with victims’ families determine whether James Holmes deserves the death penalty? You could probably consult with a wall to make that determination and get the same result. [PrawfsBlawg] * Just like that, with incredible ninja-like speed, someone has already filed a negligence suit against the Aurora Century 16 Theater where the shootings took place. [Gawker] * And no, sorry to disappoint you, but notwithstanding his self-admitted teeny peeny, we don’t think that James Holmes decided to go on a shooting spree because he got rejected by a few women on Adult Friend Finder. [Jezebel] * While we’re talking about gun violence, Mike Bloomberg has got a great idea: all police officers should go on strike until legislators push through stricter gun laws. How is a nanny state supposed to work properly when all the governesses are off duty? [Gothamist] * Knowledge is power in the hands of a client, especially when the knowledge you’ve given them is just another tool to piss off opposing counsel during a deposition. [Popehat] * Personal responsibility fail: allowing your 13-year-old to drive you home because you’re wasted. Fathering fail: believing that was a good idea in the first place. [Legal Juice] * A fake TV show starring a wheelchair-bound paraplegic paralegal? You know you’d watch this. [The Onion] -
Comment of the Day, Contests, Drinking, Violence
Comment of the Week: The Pledge of Evil
Who won the latest prize in our Comment of the Week competition? -
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Drugs, Guns / Firearms, Media and Journalism, Morning Docket, Musical Chairs, Police, Violence
Morning Docket: 06.26.12
* Congratulations to Justice Keith Blackwell, the newest member of the Georgia Supreme Court! [Associated Press]
* Is News Corp. going to divide itself in two? [Dealbook / New York Times]
* Speaking of job changes, Patrick Fitzgerald, the outgoing U.S. Attorney for Chicago, will be replaced by long-time prosecutor Gary S. Shapiro on July 1. [Thomson Reuters News & Insight]
* I admit, when I first saw the words “heroin burrito” I thought: that sounds delicious. Not because of the heroin, necessarily. Burritos are simply very tasty. [New York Daily News]
* Flo Rida was caught lying to a judge in the “slave wages” case filed by his former assistant, who claims he paid her only $3.08 an hour. Now he has been ordered to cough up $7,000. Not cool, Flo. [Inquisitr]
* Defense attorneys for a man on trial for assaulting a priest who allegedly abused him as a child are now claiming prosecutorial misconduct. Can you spell M-E-S-S? [Mercury News]
* A police officer in Carteret, N.J. saved Ellen Shane’s life by shooting and killing the man who held her hostage at knife point. But apparently that wasn’t enough, and now she has sued the city for $5 million. If she wins, she might want to consider donating the money to her lucky stars. [Newark Star-Ledger]
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Non-Sequiturs, Violence
Non-Sequiturs: 06.22.12
* Welcome to the right side of history, former anti-gay marriage guy. [New York Times] * Protecting free speech has to be more important than stopping hate speech. [National Post vai Overlawyered] * Netflix is subject to the Americans with Disabilities Act. Seems unfair to me, people are already disabled, I don’t see why you have to make them deal with Netflix too. [Boston Globe] * This Tony Parker lawsuit following the Chris Brown fight is right out of Eddie Murphy’s Raw where people start suing Eddie for “sprained eyes.” (If you haven’t seen Raw in a while, click the link. So funny.) [Daily Mail] * This law would make it a crime for a teenager to breakup with his girlfriend via text. That sounds like a great idea. [Volokh Conspiracy] * See my vest, see my vest, made of lizards I’m smuggled to the U.S. [Legal Juice] After the jump, you really have to check out Brian Cuban having an aneurism over Lindsay Lohan’s continued freedom...