Amidst all the depressing talk of layoffs and cold offers, here's a little mergers and aquisitions news to brighten your Monday: Even in a bad economy, the wedding machine grinds on. In fact, we've noticed a slight uptick in the number of registries at Neiman Marcus. So how bad can things be, really?

Here are this week's lucky featured couples:

1. Jordan Brudner and Daniel Gaspar

2. Randy Shapiro and Daniel Ripp

3. Rachel Turow and Benjamin Schiffrin

More about these newlyweds, after the jump.

We've reported that firms with "oversubscribed" summer classes are calling up 2Ls and encouraging them to not accept their 2009 summer associate offers. Unlike Akin Gump's move, the tactic is a clever dodge around the NALP guidelines. As we understand it, firms are not committing these "cold offers" to email, instead using the telephone and avoiding a paper trail.

Career services departments are trying to cope with this new law firm tactic. Some Michigan students received this email from their career services dean:

Hi. It is my understanding that you have an offer from White and Case in New York. After talking to contacts in the New York legal market, it appears that White and Case may have over-hired for next summer and has a particularly large class. Therefore, it may be in your best interest to take another offer if you have one.

According to the WSJ Law Blog, White & Case claims ignorance over why Michigan would send out this email:

A spokesman for White & Case told the Law Blog: "We don't know, honestly, why a law school career services office would send out these letters. No on has talked to us about the situation, and we've certainly not encouraged anyone to send out letters to students."

Notice how White & Case did not say "we intend to honor every summer associate offer we've made."

We have been consistently encouraging 2Ls to accept their offers sooner rather than later. Many career services departments have echoed that advice. White & Case joins Proskauer as one of the firm that has been "outed" as telling people that they should look elsewhere for offers, but we suspect that many firms are doing this.

After the jump, speculation about other firms.

In the interest of completeness, here are a few quick postscripts to stories that we previously covered in these pages, but didn't get around to mentioning during the craziness of last week. They come from the National Law Journal and/or the WSJ Law Blog.

1. Judge Robert Somma: The cross-dressing former bankruptcy judge (at right), who resigned from the bench after a drunk driving arrest, has joined the bankruptcy practice of Posternak Blankstein & Lund, a midsize firm based in Boston, as senior counsel. [National Law Journal; WSJ Law Blog]

2. American Justice School of Law: This defunct Kentucky law school, which in 2007 was hit with a class action filed by some of its students, has filed for bankruptcy. [National Law Journal; WSJ Law Blog]

3. L'Affaire Kozinski: The panel of federal judges from the Third Circuit investigating Ninth Circuit Chief Judge Alex Kozinski (at right) has retained Robert Heim, head of litigation at Dechert, to oversee the probe (which will be staffed by lawyers from Dechert and Morgan Lewis & Bockius). [National Law Journal; WSJ Law Blog]

4. University of Michigan's Wolverine Scholars Program: Sarah Zearfoss, dean of admissions at UM Law, has defended the program against allegations that it's an attempt to game the U.S. News rankings. She pointed out that the program is small, likely to result in the admission of just five to ten students (out of a class of 360), and that very few UM undergrads (about 200) would even be eligible for it. [WSJ Law Blog]

Honestly, we are not trying to pile on Michigan. We know how obsessed some of their students are with their U.S. News law school ranking. But perhaps the law school administration has taken things too far in their attempt to make Michigan the "champions of the west."

From TaxProf Blog:

Michigan's new Wolverine Scholars Program -- in which [University of] Michigan undergrads with a minimum 3.80 GPA are admitted to Michigan Law School if they agree to not take the LSAT. The rankings benefit is that there is no LSAT score to report to U.S. News, while the minimum 3.80 GPA will boost Michigan's median 3.64 GPA, which counts 10% in U.S. News' methodology.

Look Michigan, if you are going to try to rig something, at least have the decency to do it under the cover of darkness.

To a UM college student with a 3.8, the Wolverine Scholars Program looks like an interesting example of game theory. But to the rest of us, it looks a straight bribe. It's like Michigan Law School is saying: "Please, please, please don't take the LSAT. Because if you get a 167 we probably have to accept you anyway. And if you get a 175 you will better deal us for a lobster dinner."

The Big Ten strikes back, after the jump.

Last week we brought you the tale of lunchtime thievery at the University of Michigan Law School. Two months ago we told you about the international cell phone caper.

Well it's time to show that ATL can get as good as we give. Our reporting has provoked an angry response from some Michigan Law School students:

I have one question to ask the ATL e-mail forwarder: Why would you want to make a laughingstock out of *the school you attend? In case you overlooked that fact, you go here, friend. As in, you are affiliated with this school, and when ATL and a bandwagon of commentators talk smack about this school, they're talking about you by affiliation.

It's not humorous, because--believe it or not--there are actual people with actual jobs centered around fostering good PR about this school. When there are people forwarding embarrassing, curse word-filled e-mails to ATL, or e-mails denigrating poor people, it kind of goes against the grain and makes all of us look bad.

So, maybe you could stop?
Thanks.

Just to be clear, we are fans of Michigan. You will not find a sweater-vest among us. It just never occurred to us that the law school student body had been conscripted into the University Spin Team.

But apparently some students believe that one bad apple spoils the bunch:

Gossip magazines and gossip e-magazines fall short (understatement) of the student body here at Michigan Law. As a student and recipient of AbovetheLaw interview requests, I feel strongly that any contributors from our student body to a gossip column make us ALL look bad. Our allegiance should lie with our Law School (as our future jobs depend a great deal on the University's prestige) and I encourage my peers to rise AbovetheLaw for the sake of our collective good. We are Michigan Law and We will one day have "the province and duty... to say what the law is." --- Chief Justice John Marshall.

"Son, it's not about what you are called, it's about what you answer to." -- My Mom.

A curious dissent from a Michigan law student after the jump.

Michigan people, I feel your pain. The seven fumble loss to "The School That God Built, Then Abandoned" was terrible. You guys are trying to enjoy these last days of summer before the arctic wind sends you into underground bunkers. And clearly, you can't lend out a cell phone/ask for your cell phone back without getting dragged into a heated exchange that is mocked by all.

I understand how in that environment petty slights can turn into glorious insults. You demand satisfaction! But you justice seekers might want to turn somewhere other than the University of Michigan's law school list-serv. The following email was sent by a 1L who has been on campus for approximately 11 minutes and 6 seconds:

Dear Student Body,

Whoever the SLEAZE is who likes taking people's lunches (in particular, 1/2's of subway sandwiches bought on one day and saved for the next) from the refrigerator in the student lounge, STOP. In case you aren't aware, it's stealing. Perhaps you're practicing for a career in corporate law, but law school isn't the place to practice this particular skill. Also, in case you aren't aware, here are a few reasons not to do this:

1) Stealing lunches erodes collegiality among the student body.

2) Stealing lunches inconveniences the person from whom you steal by forcing them to go get lunch elsewhere, thereby wasting time and resources.

3) Stealing lunches can cause an additional inconvenience with having to buy lunch elsewhere. For most of us, the couple dollar loss isn't really the issue, but imagine not having your wallet with you on a day when someone has stolen your lunch? You must either do without or seek out somebody to borrow from, both of which are annoying.

If you're really so poor you can't afford lunch, the law school will provide you with an emergency loan. If you're just a sleaze, either take an ethics class or come talk to me.

Well allow me to retort.

1) I once got robbed and to make myself feel better, I called it "sharing" instead of "stealing."

2) Isn't forcing someone to get their lunch somewhere other than Subway kind of a good thing?

3) Not having your wallet? The only guys I know that don't carry around their wallet whenever they leave the house are super rich or homeless. Which one are you?

The rest of the maize and blue electronically punch this guy after the jump.

For the commenters who yearn to see more "ordinary" couples in the Legal Eagle Wedding Watch, we commend this pair to your attention. The groom is a radio personality, and the bride has a JD from Loyola. They seem likable and . . . ordinary. Is this the type of couple our readership craves? Should we devote one slot a week to a Tier-II couple? Designate one column a month as Ordinary Week? Please advise. (This is actually a serious question. LEWW recognizes that we can't satisfy everyone, but we do aim to please.)

For now, we'll to continue to celebrate the extraordinary. Our finalist couples have degrees from Harvard, Yale, NYU, Chicago, and other elite schools, some with athletic programs. All three brides toil in Manhattan law firms, and all three grooms serve humanity in important-sounding public-sector jobs. Here they are:

1. Jessica Buturla and Caswell Holloway IV

2. Sarah McDonald and Patrick Egan

3. Johanna Greenbaum and David Newman

More on the couples below, including photos.

The theme of yesterday's LEWW was the hotness disparity between three glowing brides and their very lucky grooms. Today we're delighted to report that the wedding gods stepped it up with our most recent batch of newlyweds. They've brought us four grooms who are at least as attractive as their brides or co-grooms. (And needless to say, all six of our newlyweds have the shiny credentials that you've come to expect from the Legal Eagle Wedding Watch.)

On to the finalists! Here they are:

1. Joanna Schwab and Nathan Pusey

2. Joseph Loy and Michael Kavey

3. Zoe Palitz and Brian Goldman

Click on the link below to find out more about these couples.

When you've been wronged, there's a part of you that wants the whole world to know. Maybe you think exposing the evildoer's misdeeds will bring solace, revenge, sympathy... But more often than not, it brings scorn. People just don't like tattletales.

Several tipsters sent along such an exchange from the University of Michigan's law school list-serv. Here's the catfight one law student sent out to the list-serv with the subject line, "not sure how to handle this:"

On Thu, Jul 24, 2008 at 11:22 PM, TATTLETALE wrote:

EVILDOER,

Listen, I tried to be nice and understanding about all this but now it's just ridiculous! I did you a favor and now I've been stuck hounding you for my phone for months and months as if you're doing ME the favor! I bought that phone for $120, so either send me a check for that amount or return the phone ASAP...

I'm not going to lecture you about how this is no way to treat a law school class mate and definately [sic] no way to start making your reputation in the legal community -- hopefully you realize all that. Just return the phone or the money so I can finally forget about this after half a year!

-TATTLETALE
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Date: Fri, 25 Jul 2008 08:01:52 +0200
From: EVILDOER
Subject: Re: phone
To: TATTLETALE

You f***ing nasty b****,
My sister is gonna give you a f***ing check that you can f***ing hold onto until I come back from rome.
EVILDOER

On Fri, Jul 25, 2008 at 7:54 AM, EVILDOER wrote:

I AM INF ***ING ROME YOU STUPID W****. I SAID I WILL MAIL IT TO YOU ONCE I
GET BACK. NO REASON TO BE A F***ING B****.

Is bar exam stress driving Michigan students over the edge?

Full exchange (warning: unredacted profanity), plus a bevy of responses, after the jump.

(We've redacted identities -- and appreciate your protecting anonymity in the comments. Thanks.)

We have contacted the two winners of our hottest law school dean contest, Asha Rangappa of Yale and Evan Caminker of Michigan, to obtain comment from them on their victories.

We haven't heard back yet from Dean Rangappa. But Dean Caminker provided us with this short and sweet statement, via email:

It was a team effort; everyone gave 110% and just wouldn't quit.

Brevity is the soul of wit. And Dean Caminker is gracious as well as gorgeous.

Congrats again, Dean Caminker!

Earlier: Prior coverage of Law School Dean Hotties (scroll down)

In response to our recent request for information about academic salaries, a number of you reminded us that the salaries of many professors at state law schools are already publicly available. We had a vague recollection of this, but were too lazy to dig up links. Thankfully, a number of you did that for us.

Here they are (from the ever-helpful TaxProf Blog):

--the top 10 law school professor salaries at the University of Michigan;

--the top 10 law school professor salaries at the University of California (various campuses); and

--the top 10 law school professor salaries at the University of Virginia.

On the Michigan data, one reader had this commentary:

Michigan is home to a number of the Elect, including (1) Daniel Halberstam (Wald/Souter), who I think is married to Nina Mendelson Ellen Katz [Ed. note: See this comment, and this NYT wedding announcement.]; (2) Joan Larsen (Sentelle/Scalia); and (3) Richard Primus (Calabresi/Ginsburg).

All of them kind of fall on the low end of the pay scale: $163,000 (Halberstam), $114,240 (Larsen), $140,000 (Primus). Do those shining gems not require corporeal nourishment, and so forgo food budgeted into their salaries?

In light of the abundance of information about legal academic salaries at public law schools, consider our earlier request for information modified. We're still interested in hearing about how much law school professors and deans -- especially hot deans -- take home. But if you have information on a non-state law school, we're far more interested in that.

As always, you can submit the information via email (subject line: Skaddenfreude). And as always, you have our undying gratitude.

Law Prof Salaries at Michigan [TaxProfBlog (also includes, as a PDF file, a table showing all U. Mich. law salaries)]
More on Law Prof Salaries [TaxProfBlog]
TOP UNIVERSITY OF CALIFORNIA EMPLOYEE SALARIES [SFGate.com via TaxProfBlog]
Ten Highest Paid University of California Law Faculty [Brian Leiter's Law School Reports]

Earlier: Skaddenfreude: Academic Salaries, Please