How To Block Out Negativity During Bar Prep
You don't need to put yourself into total isolation to do this important task.
When it comes to bar prep concerns, everyone worries about finding time to learn all the law. For once, I will skip the opportunity to lecture you on the importance of practice questions. Just kidding. Practice questions are the single most important thing you can do to pass the bar exam. However, this article isn’t about building the hard skills you need to pass the bar exam. Rather, this article is about how to protect your mental clarity and brain space so that you have the time, attention, and energy necessary to prepare for the bar exam. Put these tips into effect ASAP to preserve your precious mental resources and revisit them if you feel yourself getting drained.
1. Shut Down Social
Let’s get the the most unappealing suggestion out of the way first. I don’t have to tell you that we are the social media generation. We are constantly on social media and all have borderline addictions. We use social media for connecting (both socially and professionally) as well as to be entertained and, well, to waste time.
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There are two important reasons why I recommend shutting down all social media when you are studying for the bar exam. First, it is a huge freaking distraction. I know I am not the only one who opens up Facebook to “check one thing” and wakes up three days later unclear as to what year it is. Successfully preparing for the bar exam is a massive undertaking, and ain’t nobody got time to waste.
Second, social media is a total tease when you are studying. It is a constant reminder that there are a lot of people out there having fun, enjoying their life, and reminding you that you haven’t left the house since last Tuesday and can’t remember the last time you smiled. You don’t need that kind of external pressure. By taking a temporary social media detox, you will avoid both feeling serious FOMO and massive temptations to blow off bar prep for more fun stuff.
2. Avoid the herd mentality
When a bunch of people are going through the same thing at the same time, they can develop group anxiety. This situation is only heightened when these people are high-strung law students studying for the most important test they will ever take. It is hard enough to manage your own nerves during bar prep, so when you start to let other people’s anxiety infiltrate your thoughts, you are a goner.
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Avoid the herd mentality by not spending a ton of time around other people studying for the bar exam. Sometimes, this is unavoidable, so when you do find yourself socializing with the other bar exam crazies, put up a mental firewall. Remind yourself that you don’t have to make their problems your problems, and reinforce your confidence in your own plan.
3. Filter your advice
Evvvvvverybody who has taken the bar exam has an opinion about what you should be doing and how you should be doing it. Some of this advice might be wildly helpful, and some of it will be garbage. I highly recommend you filter any advice you receive through the following questions:
- Do I already have a system for this?
- Is that system working?
- Could this piece of advice improve an existing system?
Depending on your answers to these questions, you may consider implementing the advice. But if you don’t end up trying it, don’t feel guilty or that you are missing out. Know that you considered your options and made the best decision for you.
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4. Trust your mentors
One thing that will help you filter your advice is having confidence in your own plan. Now is the time to seek wise counsel from experts you trust. If you don’t already have a relationship with the department at your law school that is responsible for bar prep, now is the time to find them and make them your best friends. These folks are trained and experienced in all things bar prep and can help you make informed choices about how to spend your time.
Additionally, get acquainted with the representatives from your bar prep company. First, you’ve paid them a lot of money, so make sure you are tapping into them as a resource. Second, they are invested in your success and definitely have wisdom to share with you. When you have people whose advice you can count on, you can worry less about what everyone else is saying and doing.
5. Set and respect your boundaries
One of the biggest sources of negativity in bar prep can come from those you love, and who love you, the most. It can be really hard for people who have not been through the experience of studying for the bar exam to truly understand the amount of stress you are going through and what is at stake. You may have that one friend or family member that just doesn’t get it. He or she might pressure you to do things you don’t have time for and get mad at you for saying no.
Make sure that you put some boundaries in place at the outset of bar prep. Take a look at your schedule and determine how much free time you will have and how you want to spend it. Once you have this information, let it be your guide in deciding what invitations you say yes to during bar prep. If you know what your priorities are and what you need to do to achieve them it is easier to stick to your plan and minimize the emotional impact of external pressure.
Finally, go easy on yourself. You can set all the boundaries, turn off all the electronics, ignore all the people, and still find yourself dealing with some negativity. That’s okay. This is a stressful time in your life, and it is important that you give yourself permission to acknowledge it. Grant yourself some space to process your feelings so that you can move on from them and get back to studying. Good luck, you’ve got this.
Kerriann Stout is a millennial law school professor and founder of Vinco (a bar exam coaching company) who is generationally trapped between her students and colleagues. Kerriann has helped hundreds of students survive law school and the bar exam with less stress and more confidence. She lives, works, and writes in the northeast. You can reach her by email at info@vincoprep.com.