This has probably already been done at some law school parody show or “law revue.” If so, feel free to point that out, in the comments.
But if not — of even if it has, but someone wants to revisit it, in light of the current (dismal) state of the legal job market — here are suggested lyrics for No Offer, No Cry (to the tune of Bob Marley’s No Woman, No Cry):
No offer, no cry
No offer, no cry
Said – said – said: I remember when we used to sit
In the career services office in law school,
Observing the Biglaw hypocrites
As they would mingle with the good people we meet.
Classmates we have, oh, classmates we’ve lost
Along the way.
In 3L interviewing, you can’t forget your past;
So dry your tears, I say.
Earlier this month, we raised the subject of cold offers. Now it’s time to talk about a topic we raised last year, but have not yet raised this year: the cold offer’s crueler cousin, the NO OFFER.
We hear that no-offering is on the rise — which is not surprising, given the tanking economy and Biglaw layoffs. Which law firms are doling out no-offers to their summer associates this year? Feel free to discuss, in the comments.
As always, caveat lector. Information in the comments has not been verified, and we make no representations or warranties as to its accuracy. Read at your own risk.
If you’d like to send us a tip that you are capable of vouching for — e.g., you were a summer at the firm in question — please email us (subject line: “No Offer – [Firm Name]”). For tips submitted via email, we will try to verify them if we can, and possibly revert to you with a list of no-offer factories (to use last year’s coinage). Thanks.
Earlier: Fall Recruiting Open Thread: Cold Offers
Fall Recruiting Open Thread: No-Offer Factories