Police

When you patronize other fast food establishments, you could be taking your life into your own hands. And we’re not talking about transfats and the adverse health consequences of eating fast food (which have already spawned various lawsuits). Take Taco Bell. Just like Burger King, they stand accused of serving drug-laced food: Phillip Dagget, 27, […]

No, definitely not. Due to their variegated hair and eye color, white people have the best claim to internal diversity in appearance. But these two white people DO look alike: As a result, this screw-up — while mortifying and GI-normous — is somewhat understandable: “We are horribly sorry,” the cop said. The 17-year-old girl who […]

Back when we worked at McDonald’s, customers would ask us if we sold onion rings. We would tell them, with suppressed exasperation, that no, sorry, we don’t. If you want onion rings, try Burger King. And if you want your food laced with pot, try Burger King, too. From the AP: Two police officers sued […]

This hasn’t turned into a lawsuit — yet. But we can see one coming from a mile away. And local law enforcement did get involved. So it’s appropriate fodder for Above the Law. Here’s the story: You can lift, strain, crunch and sweat all you want at the Planet Fitness in the Dutchess County village. […]