Holidays and Seasons, In-House Counsel

The Road Not Taken: ‘Tis the Season

It's time to reflect on the year and truly appreciate the gifts your career has given you over the past 12 months.

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It is the holiday season and as good a time as any to let the the currents of forced generosity and merriment carry us into a moment of introspection about the gifts we’ve received in our lives over the past year.

For me, the mayhem of the end of the year has quieted. I can reflect on the year and truly appreciate the gifts my career has given me over the past 12 months. Thinking about what I’ve received from my job, and actually articulating those gifts to myself help me through the next year when I get overwhelmed and frustrated. I find that if I know what the good is, I can survive the bad.

Over the years, I have received many gifts from my jobs. Even when the job wasn’t making me happy, I received something of value. Some years are more generous than others, but there has always been something I could put on my list of gifts. At the time, the gift may have been a desperate grasp at a single, tiny Christmas tree bulb, but it was there. By naming it and claiming it, it could shine like a lighthouse in the darkness of the rest of the coming year.

If you are reading this and thinking, “I didn’t get anything from my job this year. I mean, I got a gift card to Chipotle from the paralegal and a box of overly sweet chocolates from the court reporter I use. That’s it.” Now, overly sweet chocolates are fine and delightful for an immediate dopamine hit, but dopamine is a love affair to forget and regret. No, there are greater gifts you were given, you just don’t see them yet.

In years when I had to search for those single, tiny lights, I found I could identify my gifts by looking at what didn’t go well for me that year. Why did I feel so isolated? What experiences over the past year caused me the most pain? Those events themselves were not the gifts, but what I learned from the painful events were an enormous gift. The lessons didn’t have to be substantive, they could be related to character, management, or lifestyle preferences I didn’t know I had.

An example: A very good former boss of mine once told me she learned how to be a good boss by working for a terrible boss. She learned what not to do. It wasn’t a fun way to learn those lessons, but now she is amazing at what she does; not just because she is an expert in her field, but because she is an excellent leader and manager.

Some of the gifts I have been lucky enough to receive through the years include supportive colleagues, new skills, refinement of old skills, and the acquired ability to navigate different personalities. When I review my gifts, I start with these categories to find the obvious examples and from that mix, I can expand my list into new categories.

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I am fortunate now to have an ocean full of lighthouses. I am grateful for the gifts I have received from all of my jobs, the gifts I receive from my current job, and the gifts I’ve received from this column. I’ve been fortunate to develop deeper relationships with my colleagues, and I am more fortunate that those colleagues are generous with their knowledge and talents. I’ve received the gifts of laughter in stressful situations, appreciation in dark times, and acknowledgement of my efforts. I have all of 2015 to obsess over the things that irritate me about my job, but in the thick of that frustration, I’ll know I am fortunate because I took the time now to think about my job, my career, the direction I am going, what I want, and what I have.

I hope the gifts you received from your career this year were plentiful and valuable. If this wasn’t a windfall year for you, find your tiny lights and put them in your lighthouse. It may be dark for you now, but bulb by bulb, light by light, your world will brighten. With enough lighthouses guiding your way, you will get where you want to be.

Celeste Harrison Forst has practiced in small and mid-sized firms and is now in-house at a large manufacturing and technology company where she receives daily hugs from her colleagues. You can reach Celeste directly at C.harrisonforst@gmail.com.

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