Well now this is a doozy.
We all know that a grand jury will indict anyone or anything.[1] The “ham sandwich” is such a legendary example of this phenomenon that it’s a perennial Halloween costume for lawyers who are so tragically bereft of a personality that they literally dress up as lawyer stuff on their own time.[2]
But this story puts those tales to shame. Phillip Bantz of North Carolina Lawyers Weekly has the story of that awkward moment when you end up indicting yourself:
The Next Chapter In Legal Tech Innovation: Introducing Protégé™
Meet LexisNexis Protégé™, the new AI assistant that leverages personalization choices controlled by the user or their organization to optimize the individual’s AI experience.
While serving on the grand jury, Raylon Parker sat in on the proceedings in his own indictment and then participated in the vote, which resulted in a true bill finding sufficient evidence that he could have committed a crime, according to Superior Court Judge Alma Hinton.
“I asked him if he stepped aside when the matter was voted on and he did not,” she said. “I don’t know that this has ever happened before.”
Because grand jury proceedings are secret, Hinton could not say how the 28-year-old voted, only that he did.
So maybe he didn’t indict himself, but this seems like a screw up on the part of, well, just about anyone involved in the process other than poor Mr. Parker. It’s kind of indicative of how much of a joke these proceedings really are that prosecutors and the courts don’t bother to figure out if a potential defendant is even sitting in the room before rolling ahead with their one-sided trial dress rehearsal.
On the other hand, maybe this guy was just taking his role seriously and dutifully indicted himself. I mean, I’m sure it’s some small potatoes victimless cri–
Halifax’s clerk of court reported that Parker was indicted on a charge of assault with a deadly weapon with intent to kill.
8 Tips For Creating A Comprehensive ‘AI In The Workplace’ Policy
Corporate investment and usage in generative AI technologies continues to accelerate. This article offers eight specific tips to consider when creating an AI usage policy.
Oh. Well then.
Not-so grand juror [NC Lawyers Weekly]
[1] Check local listings. Exception for police officers who shoot black people may apply.
[2] Oh. Um… be sure to send us your submissions to our annual costume contest!!! We love and appreciate your unbridled enthusiasm! Phew. Staci Zaretsky is slowly uncocking the gun she put to my temple.