UPDATE: 11/16/16 10:00 a.m.: Check out an important update to this story here.
Polly wants a cracker. But which spouse is liable for providing crackers during the week, and which is on the hook on weekends and two weeks over the summer?
Attorney Michael Adler celebrated his most recent successful divorce settlement by posting on Twitter, and he seems to be harboring some — inevitably tongue-in-cheek — concerns about his career choices.
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Just settled a divorce over visitation of a parrot. Neither may teach it negative phrases about the other. I went to law school for this.
— Michael Adler (@madler9000) November 14, 2016
Sometimes you don’t get to choose the battles you fight, and that means you wake up drafting a non-disparagement agreement for a f**king parrot.
The struggle is real in this profession.
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Joe Patrice is an editor at Above the Law and co-host of Thinking Like A Lawyer. Feel free to email any tips, questions, or comments. Follow him on Twitter if you’re interested in law, politics, and a healthy dose of college sports news.