I receive many emails from readers of my column here and my website Student Debt Diaries. And definitely feel free to email me with any questions or comments you might have! When I first starting writing about student debt, I expected that many individuals with student loans would email me with questions or input. However, I never imagined that I would receive so many emails from parents of student debt borrowers. Nevertheless, a sizable amount of the emails I receive each week are from parents seeking information that might be helpful to children who are burdened with student debt.
I guess it makes sense that parents would want advice that could help their kids deal with student loans. Student debt is a source of great stress for many borrowers, and parents just want to help their kids succeed. Many parents have expressed to me in numerous emails that they feel bad that they did not have money available to help their kids pay for law school. However, there are a number of reasons why parents have no reason to feel bad if they can’t afford to help their kids pay for their law school expenses.
My parents did not put any money aside to help me pay for either college or graduate school. And some parents just do not have the resources to dedicate funds for their children’s educations. However, even if parents do set money aside that their kids can use for educational expenses, it is hard to predict if their children will want to attend graduate school in the first place. Although many parents can safely assume that their kids will want to attend college, it is much more uncertain if their children will want to earn a graduate degree. Indeed, this decision is largely based on the type of career someone wants to pursue, and this decision is usually not finalized until someone is basically an adult.
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Saving for educational expenses takes years, since it usually requires monthly payments over a long period of time to dedicate enough money for a kid’s educational expenses. However, if someone decided to attend law school or another graduate program as an adult, there is typically not enough time to meaningfully save for this expense. Since it is difficult to predict whether a child will even want to earn a graduate degree, parents should not feel bad if they cannot afford to help their kids pay for law school.
Furthermore, law school is extremely expensive, and tuition and fees for most law students exceed what the average person earns in a year. Unless parents are rich, it is very difficult to expect parents to have the resources necessary to pay for both a child’s college and law school expenses. Of course, if parents had enough money to pay for law school, and failed to set funds aside for this purpose, that’s one thing. However, most parents are simply not capable of paying for law school, and they cannot be faulted for this.
In addition, setting aside money for law school could prevent parents from dedicating funds to a number of other purposes. Many people in this country are not prepared for retirement, and much “digital ink” has been expended on this topic. One of the reasons why individuals might not have enough money saved up for retirement is because parents devote cash to their children’s educations that could be used in their “golden years.” It is completely understandable that parents would want to use available money to save for retirement rather than finance their kid’s education. After all, children attending law school have a longer period of time to pay off their student debt than most parents do to save for retirement.
Another reason why parents should not feel bad about not paying for their kid’s law school education is since having student loans can positively impact someone’s life. I have made this point before, and this argument has earned me no love on the internet. However, it is true that having debt and paying this money back builds financial responsibility, character, and a number of other positive attributes. I personally think that I would be in far worse shape if I did not need to borrow student loans to attend law school, since I would have less motivation to succeed. I am not saying that student debt is not a burden, and of course, student loans can negatively impact someone’s life. However, it is worth pointing out that someone could actually be better off in the long run if they have student loans, and parents should not feel bad if their kids need to borrow student debt.
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Hearing from so many parents over the past several months has made me realize how the student debt crisis in this country not only affects borrowers, but other members of their families as well. Many parents make sacrifices so that their kids are not as burdened by student loans, and other parents are just not capable of paying for a child’s law school education. However, most parents have no reason to feel bad if they are not able to help their kids pay for law school.
Jordan Rothman is the founder of Student Debt Diaries, a personal finance website discussing how he paid off all $197,890.20 of his college and law school student loans over 46 months of his late 20s. You can reach him at [email protected].