Government

Comey, McCabe Yeeted Out Of Trump RICO LOLsuit Against Hillary Clinton

That Federal Tort Claims Act is a bitch, dude!

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(Photo by PAUL J. RICHARDS/AFP/Getty Images)

Donald Trump’s dumpster fire RICO suit against Hillary Clinton and half of DC is burning bright today as James Comey and Andy McCabe successfully noped out of this case, substituting the government as defendant under the Westfall and Federal Tort Claims Acts.

This is the LOLsuit based on the preposterous theory that Hillary Clinton conspired with her good buddy James Comey and Rep. Adam Schiff to start an FBI investigation of Trump’s Russia ties. And it’s filed in the Southern District of Florida, because, where else, right?

On July 14, the United States moved to dismiss the claims against Comey and McCabe, as well as former FBI employees Lisa Page, Peter Strzok, and Kevin Clinesmith, arguing that the alleged tortious conduct was within the scope of their government employment, and thus they are not appropriate defendants. And because the government hasn’t waived sovereign immunity under, umm, whatever batshit torts this case is alleging, it asked to dismiss the case as well.

This morning, Judge Donald Middlebrooks granted the first part of the request, allowing the former FBI agents to exit stage left, presumably after flipping Trump the bird on the way out. In what is perhaps a signal that this case may not be long for the world, the court deferred ruling on the government’s motion to dismiss.

In fact there are several pending motions to dismiss Trump’s slightly amended complaint, which attempts to deal with the statute of limitations problem by arguing that he only discovered the “conspiracy” during the recent failed prosecution of former Perkins Coie lawyer Michael Sussmann by Special Counsel John Durham. Never mind that Trump tweeted about said “conspiracy” continuously from 2016 until 2021, when he got kicked off Twitter — an event which he blames Clinton for in this very lawsuit.

Trump is represented in this case by his former military school roommate Peter Ticktin, a Florida-based divorce and personal injury attorney who is, as they say, a character, and Trump’s New Jersey lawyer Alina Habba, whom he dispatches to shout inanities and/or gangsta rap lyrics, as the situation may require. The pair filed a motion this morning, demanding that the trial date be moved from May of 2023 to the following November “due to the complexities of the case, amount of parties involved in the litigation, and the amount of anticipated discovery that will need to be conducted.”

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Ticktin signed an accompanying affidavit saying that he thinks the trial will take 45 days, rather than the allotted 14. And, yes, okay, he hasn’t managed to serve all the parties since this case was filed in March. But that’s the fault of the darn Hague Convention, not his own lack of diligence and/or competence!

The defendants oppose expending any more time or billable hours on the scheduling issue, noting tersely that “considerations of efficiency, economy, and burden dictate that the parties postpone any discussions about the future of this case until the Court ascertains the number of Defendants and claims, if any, genuinely at issue.”

If any.

UPDATE: Well, that didn’t take long! Judge Middlebrooks already bounced Trump’s motion to postpone the trial until November of 2023. “These representations are vague, and do not constitute good cause for an extension,” he wrote in the order denying the motion. “Plaintiff fails to offer any specific details about the discovery he anticipates needing or why he will be unable to obtain that discovery before the trial date that I have set.” Womp womp.

Trump v. Clinton [Docket via Court Listener]

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Liz Dye lives in Baltimore where she writes about law and politics.

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