Courts

Lawyer Gets Shamed After Allegedly Rushing A Phish Stage In The Nude

Counsel needs to chill out and listen to some tunes, man.

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emperor has no clothes naked emperorThere’s a difference between playing hardball and unsportsmanlike conduct. Threatening to embarrass the other side by bashing their family and threatening to tell their undergrad school what a dunce they’ve been? That’s some Phishy behavior. Coverage from the ABA Journal:

A Colorado lawyer’s “demeaning and unprofessional language” and threats of disclosure in a demand letter seeking $50,000 for her client’s injuries at a Phish concert have led to a public censure. Lawyer Sarah Jay Schielke of Colorado received the public censure for her demand letter to another lawyer who is identified as V.D. in a Jan. 25 stipulation to discipline.

Schielke’s letter alleged that V.D. rushed the Phish stage, while naked, at a February 2022 concert in Mexico.

While I don’t have the numbers at hand, there is this post asking about a Phish nudist colony — I’d wager that the number of nudist Phish fans is probably disproportionately high. But to bum rush the stage? Phish makes elevator music to play backgammon to, not bum-rush. What track did V.D. bombard the stage to? Reba? If you want to rush a stage naked, be a normal person and go to a Black Dahlia Murder concert — the mosh pit is far more likely to cheer you on than try to classify you in the DSM-5:

In the letter, Schielke called V.D. a “violent psychopath,” “a violent a- -hole,” “an idiot,” “obnoxious,” “stupid,” “a shameless, ridiculous boasting s- – -,” “a terrible f- – -ing attorney” and “a disgrace to the Colorado Bar, the Phish community and [his] family.”

For what it’s worth, Schielke would probably be welcomed at a Dahlia concert — her response to the reprimand was pretty metal:

“I stand by everything I said about the guy, but I recognize that none of that content should have been included in a demand letter from an attorney. I lost my objectivity, and that was a mistake. Lesson learned. When you’re close to the client and emotions are high, the better way to help a best friend is to just refer the case out.”

For the uninitiated, that was lawyer speak for “Fuck that guy, I was right.” Sounds pretty metal to me.

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Accusation That Naked ‘Idiot’ Lawyer Injured Phish Fan While Rushing Stage Leads To Legal Discipline For Writer [ABA Journal]

Chris Williams became a social media manager and assistant editor for Above the Law in June 2021. Prior to joining the staff, he moonlighted as a minor Memelord™ in the Facebook group Law School Memes for Edgy T14s.  He endured Missouri long enough to graduate from Washington University in St. Louis School of Law. He is a former boatbuilder who cannot swim, a published author on critical race theory, philosophy, and humor, and has a love for cycling that occasionally annoys his peers. You can reach him by email at [email protected] and by tweet at @WritesForRent.

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