Legal Eagle Wedding Watch 8.8: Oklahoma!
When we filed our last column, we were full of anticipation over Chelsea Clinton’s then-upcoming wedding. And the New York Times did not let us down with its wall-to-wall coverage of the big day. In case you missed it, you can read the NYT on Chelsea’s dress, Chelsea’s wedding planner, the secrecy, the confidentiality agreements, the feeding frenzy, the frustration of the fashion media, the interfaith angle, the rabbi’s spiritual journey, and the reaction in the town of Rhinebeck. Oh, and there’s a slideshow.
And now, on to this week’s couples (we’re including one standout from mid-July that we’d missed):
1. Emma Mittelstaedt and James Burnham
Navigating Financial Success by Avoiding Common Pitfalls and Maximizing Firm Performance
Read all about these couples and their exploits, after the jump.
1. Emma Mittelstaedt and James Burnham
(Buy them an electric toothbrush.)
The Case:
– These Windy City residents have twin JDs from the University of Chicago. The bride has an undergraduate degree, cum laude, from Georgetown; the groom graduated with honors from the University of Texas.
– Federal clerkships? Check. James just finished a tour in the chambers of colorful legal personality (and Chief Judge of the Ninth Circuit) Alex Kozinski. He’s now headed for Jones Day. Emma is about to begin a clerkship in Chicago for Judge Robert W. Gettleman (interviewed by Lat back in his Underneath Their Robes days).
Sponsored
Is The Future Of Law Distributed? Lessons From The Tech Adoption Curve
Legal AI: 3 Steps Law Firms Should Take Now
The Business Case For AI At Your Law Firm
Legal AI: 3 Steps Law Firms Should Take Now
The Case Against:
– A Kozinski clerkship and no SCOTUS slot? Was James the runt of his term’s litter, or is Judge K’s feeder status — gasp! — on the wane?
(Of course, in fairness, many clerks wind up at One First Street a few years after their feeder-judge clerkships end.)
2. Dace Caldwell and Roman Martinez
(Buy them a pastry brush.)
The Case:
– This bride, who hails from the heartiest heart of our nation’s heartland, graduated summa from Oklahoma State and has a law degree from the University of Oklahoma, leading us to suspect that these are two different schools. She’s now an associate at Gibson Dunn in DC and one of Bisnow’s “30 Under 30” rising legal stars.
– And our sweet country lass has shure ’nuff snagged herself a high-flying citified lawyer: The groom is a summa cum laude graduate of Harvard, with a masters from Cambridge and a JD from Yale. He’ll soon start work as an associate at Latham — after (swoon!) finishing a SCOTUS clerkship with Chief Justice John G. Roberts Jr.
The Case Against:
– Our traditional ferverish hero-worship of SCOTUS clerks — which, to be fair, merely continues a hallowed ATL tradition that began with Article III Groupie and her praise for “The Elect” — puts us in a bit of a bind now that we’re, ahem, living with one. Prudence dictates that we tone it down a bit, before a certain someone decides he’s too awesome to take out the garbage. (Not that Roman isn’t impressive, because he totally is.)
Sponsored
Generative AI In Legal Work — What’s Fact And What’s Fiction?
Navigating Financial Success by Avoiding Common Pitfalls and Maximizing Firm Performance
3. Anne Stephens and Preston Lloyd
(Buy them a steak knife.)
The Case:
– This couple met as undergraduates at UVA and then earned JDs on opposite sides of the country, he at UVA and she at Stanford.
– The groom works as a real estate associate in the Norfolk office of Richmond firm Williams Mullen. The bride is about to begin a clerkship for Judge Rebecca Beach Smith of U.S. District Court for the Eastern District of Virginia.
The Case Against:
– An ATL tipster described this couple as “unbelievably contemptible.” Ouch. That may be a tad strong, but there certainly are plenty of “wow” moments in their write-up — and not in a good way.
The two met in French class during spring 2002. She was the girl who almost always wore dresses and high heels to class, yet drove a dirt-covered car filled with horseback-riding gear.
Here the writer skillfully communicates to us that the bride rides horses — making her fresh and authentic — but isn’t a lesbian.
She did drink her first glass of wine ever with him one evening, while studying French together. It was the kind of evening that should have ended in a kiss, but didn’t.
Actually, it should have ended in some boots-knockin’. But for this pair, first base was . . . square dancing:
That fall, she was his date for the Colonnade Ball, an annual university tradition. “They play the Virginia reel,” she said. “Boys line up on one side, girls on the other. The girls curtsy and the boys bow and then you do-si-do with your partner.” They were not a bit lost on the dance floor.
Okay, that one is more a reflection on UVA’s lame the-South-will-rise-again pretentiousness than on them.
Wherever they went, he insisted on opening doors for her. “I’d start walking up to a door,” she said, “and he’d cough and say: ‘You’ve got to let me open that door. You have to practice that more.'”
Theatrical, self-conscious chivalry like this creeps us out. “You have to practice that more” — is that gentlemanly, or just controlling?
Both have perfect spelling, even without a spell-checker.
According to . . . themselves? How in love with yourself do you have to be to brag about your spelling in the New York Times wedding section?
His letters stood out, though, for their length and literary flourishes. “My writing is straight emotion and his is beautifully done,” she said. “He would always close with, ‘Ever I remain, truly yours.'”
Enough. ENOUGH. At this point, it’s gone so over-the-top that one begins to suspect the Vows writer is just being mean. If you dare, read keep reading for more about their “weighty” ceremony and high-minded career ambitions.
The Verdict:
– Is there any suspense at all about this question? An over-achieving bride who looks like Angelina Jolie, a d-Electable groom — Team Caldwell-Martinez, by an Oklahoma mile! Congratulations to all the newlyweds.
