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Lawyer of the Month: May Reader Poll

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Yes, I get that June 14th is a little bit late to be doing the May Lawyer of the Month poll. Yes, I also understand that the person who will almost undoubtedly be June’s Playmate Lawyer of the Month, Reema Bajaj, is ineligible for May — and that fact might leave some of our readers with blue balls.

But you know what? There were some really interesting candidates for May. And they deserve their moment of fame/infamy on these pages. Not every lawyer has to allegedly sell vaginal access in order to be special.

For instance, some people can become famous simply with an attempt at sexual trespass….

May’s candidates for Lawyer of the Month aren’t really known as practicing attorneys. But they are all people with legal training. And they’re all alive:

Anna Alaburda: I think we all know who I’ll be voting for. Anna Alaburda is the person who is suing Thomas Jefferson School of Law for its allegedly misleading employment statistics. Sure, she might get crushed in court. But Curt Flood also lost, yet his cause was ultimately victorious. Perhaps Alaburda will follow a similar path.

Judge Rae Lee Chabot: Americans are good at getting angry at people who seem to be slacking off on their jobs, even though most Americans take as many liberties as they think they can get away with. It is therefore not surprising that Judge Rae Lee Chabot was treated to a hefty helping of scorn when an investigation showed that she was taking three hour lunches and shopping at the Gap during the work day. Hypocrites. Like people everywhere aren’t busting their hump in the hopes that someday they too will be able to take as long a “lunch” as they damn well please.

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Judge Philip Kirk: The worst thing about Judge Kirk is that, thanks to him, for about a week there was a picture of a man smelling a jockstrap waiting for me every time I logged into work. Yes. Philip Kirk is the judge who told a defendant: “I think you were born gayer than a sweet-smelling jock strap.” In related news, I think Modells just took out a jockstrap Google ad on Judge Kirk’s name.

Dominique Strauss-Kahn: Yeah, this guy is a lawyer. He obtained his law degree from the University of Paris and founded a corporate law consulting firm. It’s all over his Wikipedia page. Of course, there are other things all over his Wikipedia page too. For his sake, I hope all that other stuff isn’t true. Otherwise, Strauss-Kahn could have an Andy Dufresne-like experience, dispensing legal and financial advice to guards and inmates as he stars in the real-life movie, The Rikers Redemption.

Earlier: Class Action Filed Against Thomas Jefferson School of Law
What’s Wrong With Three-Hour Lunches and Shopping at the Gap?
Judge Calls Defendant ‘Gayer Than a Sweet-Smelling Jock Strap’
Is The ‘Perp Walk’ Contrary To Justice?

Who is May's Lawyer of the Month

  • Anna Alaburda (39%, 108 Votes)
  • Dominique Strauss-Kahn (28%, 78 Votes)
  • Judge Philip Kirk (20%, 55 Votes)
  • Judge Rae Lee Chabot (12%, 33 Votes)

Total Voters: 274

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