Pls Hndle Thx: Solicitation for Lucrative Partnership

Ed. note: Have a question for next week? Send it in to advice@abovethelaw.com.

ATL,
I am a T20 2L in the top half (but not top 1/3) of my class. Since I know I will not be able to secure a job practicing law to pay off my loans, and would prefer to avoid returning to bartending, I am considering entering business in another country, possibly South Africa. My question is: How good does an American JD look to growing businesses abroad?
JetSet

I seek to cure what’s deep inside
Frightened of this thing that I’ve become
It’s gonna take a lot to drag me away from you
There’s nothing that a hundred men or more could ever do
I bless the rains down in Africa (I bless the rains!)


Dear JetSet,
The answer to your question depends on what type of “business” you want to pursue. I have it on good information that a contractor with Nigerian National Petroleum Corporation made a numbered time (fixed) deposit in the total money amount of € 10 0,0 000,00.00 (TEN MILLION US DOLLARS) in an Account and on maturity all efforts by the American Embassy to contact his next of kin were Fruitless. They seek a foreigner to open an account to facilitate the transfer of money. I also know that Ms. Nonny Yuri, lonely widow from Ukraine, seeks Kind hearted sir for romance relationship and amenable arrangement. Your opportunities abroad appear endless.
I can’t speak intelligently about the “power” of a JD in Africa or elsewhere. The last place I went abroad was an island off the coast of Croatia and the people seemed more astounded by my alarming pallor than they were by my magnificent education and work experience. I also didn’t see very many businesses there, except for pizza restaurants and One Day Excursion tour operators, both of which are admittedly cash cows. But the world is much bigger than Croatia, and if you’re lucky enough to be in the top 1/3 of your law school class, then you’re pretty much guaranteed a job running a successful business abroad. The future is decidedly less bright for top 1/2 students, many of whom will eek out their lives in Thai prisons, carving dentures out of wood.
I hope this helps.
Your friend,
Marin

Look, I know that World Cup 2010 tickets are hard to come by. I’m also thinking of just heading to Cape Town and hoping for the best. But starting a whole new career just to get into a football derby seems a little extreme.
Your desire to expatriate yourself is very cosmopolitan. Yay globalization, you’ve passed the Thomas Friedman test. Your multinational corporation awaits.
But I wouldn’t give up on America so quickly. Given your bartending skills, it shouldn’t be too hard for you to get a first year associate drunk and fired. It shouldn’t be too hard to get good blackmail on a partner. There’s got to be at least one area where you excel. Maybe it’s not law school. But getting people drunk is a skill that should never be underestimated.
Name what you want and it’s there, the American dream
Spend and have money to spare, the American dream
Live like you haven’t a care, the American dream
What other place can compare, the American dream
Come and get more than your share, the American dream

Float like a cork,
The Engineer

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I agree with Elie; all hope is not lost for a US legal job. Besides what does “business opportunities abroad” really mean? Going into the merchant business along the Spice Route? Introducing the Cathay silk worm to the West? It means nothing; it’s just a corny phrase people use when they’ve run out of ideas about what to do with their lives. So instead of pulling a Manifest Destiny, why not think about what sort of “business” you want to run or legal job you want to have first and then figure out the best place to start your engine. You may yet discover that the good ole US suits you.
Do you have a question for next week’s Pls Hndle Thx? Send it to advice@abovethelaw.com.

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