Archive for August 2010

Elie’s Semiannual Vacation Memo

By Elie Mystal

From time to time, I find it necessary to give Above the Law readers an extended break from their tireless work as copy editors, issue spotters, and defenders of American values. That’s right — it’s time for me to go vacation.

What will I be doing? Well, to be honest, I’ve been inspired by the Bonobos ad campaign. It reminded me that there was a time when I was interested in a broad array of topics — like the behavioral proclivities of bonobo apes — that had nothing to do with the legal issues of the day. I used to care about things like ape sex, string theory, and Egyptian eunuchs. So I’m taking a bit of a cultural holiday. MoMa, Museum of Natural History, Into the Universe with Stephen Hawking, here I come….

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Morning Docket: 08.09.10

By Kashmir Hill

Did HP CEO Mark Hurd star in this, too?

* Elena Kagan was sworn in on Saturday… and is still looking for law clerks. [BLT - Blog of the Legal Times]

* Entrepreneurial law firms could make out like bandits from the whistleblower incentives in the financial reform bill. [Financial Times]

* War crimes trial at the Hague devolves into Naomi Campbell prosecution. [Gawker]

* A Skinemax actress brings down the CEO of HP with the help of celebrity attorney Gloria Allred. [Associated Press; San Jose Mercury News; Wall Street Journal]

* Rankings that rankle? [Am Law Daily]

* Call 1-800-HYPO-CRITE. [Tampa Bay Online]

New Jersey Court Rules Against the Parents of Adolf Hitler

By David Lat

But not because they brought a megalomaniacal murderer into the world. We’re not talking about Adolf Hitler, the deceased German dictator, but about Adolf Hitler Campbell, a little boy living in New Jersey.

The idea of some poor kid running around with the name “Adolf Hitler” might be amusing on its own, but the story here is also serious and sad. The AP reports:

A New Jersey couple who gave their children Nazi-inspired names should not regain custody of them, a state appeals court ruled Thursday, citing the parents’ own disabilities and the risk of serious injury to their children.

The state removed Heath and Deborah Campbell’s three small children from their home in January 2009. A month earlier, the family drew attention when a supermarket refused to decorate a birthday cake for their son, Adolf Hitler Campbell.

First they won’t let him have Leningrad; now he can’t get a birthday cake. Poor Adolf Hitler just can’t catch a break.

So what did the New Jersey appellate court decide?

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Non-Sequiturs: 08.06.10

By Elie Mystal

* Doesn’t Naomi Campbell just scream “key witness in the war crimes trial of former dictator”? No? Well, she screams something. [WSJ Law Blog]

* I guess judges on the Ninth Circuit won’t be eating at Chipotle any time soon. [Bloomberg Businessweek]

* Lat didn’t get smacked around by Jezebel for telling women to grow up about sexual harassment. At least not as much as we thought he would. They’re totally getting soft over there. [Jezebel]

* If a partner ever demanded that I keep my office door open, I would have said “alright, but you should know your wife really values her privacy.” [ABA Journal]

* Blogs are a form of mass media, which means your statute of limitations is tolling as we speak. [Simple Justice]

* You know what’s really going to piss off Republicans off? When the government starts redirecting taxpayer dollars to help poor people pay for medical marijuana. Seriously, it might make George Will’s head actually explode. [New York Daily News]

A Friday Present for You: A Hyperlinked Copy of the Prop 8 Ruling

By David Lat

The biggest legal news story of the past week — even bigger than the confirmation of Elena Kagan, which was widely expected — was the ruling of Chief Judge Vaughn Walker (N.D. Cal.) in Perry v. Schwarzenegger. Judge Walker struck down California’s Proposition 8, a voter-passed ban on gay marriage, citing due process and equal protection grounds.

The decision was popular with Above the Law readers. In our poll, about 80 percent of you expressed support. But how many of you have actually read the entire 136-page ruling? If you’re looking for some fun this weekend, curl up with our special ATL edition of the opinion.

We’ve uploaded a version of the decision in fully hyperlinked form, i.e., with links to the authorities cited by Judge Walker. It’s available below….

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In Boston, Merit-Based Compensation Could Be Taking Hold

By Elie Mystal

It must be a slow news week over in mainstream media land. Earlier this week, the New York Times did a survey piece about American salary cuts that tangentially touched on lawyer salaries — old news for people on top of the legal market, but probably new to a more general audience.

Today, the Boston Globe is getting in on the lawyer pay action. Its report focuses on the move towards merit-based associate compensation that’s been happening for at least a year:

Boston’s top law firms are dramatically changing how they pay young lawyers, adapting to a changing market by adopting Wall Street-style compensation systems that rely on performance bonuses for large shares of annual earnings.

Major law firms have traditionally hired junior lawyers at six-figure salaries and awarded annual increases based on the number of years at the firm, a system known as “lockstep.’’ But several of Boston’s largest and best-known firms are telling associates that they no longer can count on automatic raises. Instead, they will receive salaries and bonuses based on how partners assess their performance.

Wall Street-style compensation, is it? Well then, I guess we should expect bonuses in Boston this year to be all over the map, instead of in strict lockstep with what peer firms end up paying…

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How Much Do Retired Wachtell Partners Make?

By David Lat

Wachtell Lipton is one of the nation’s most prestigious and most profitable law firms. The lawyers who work there, especially the partners, are some seriously smart cookies.

So perhaps it shouldn’t be surprising that a former Wachtell partner has gotten the best of his ex-wife in contentious divorce proceedings. Leigh Jones of the National Law Journal reports:

It may have been the result of some crafty legal maneuvering by a Wachtell, Lipton, Rosen & Katz partner, or it may have simply been part of his tempestuous marriage to a “European Playmate” nearly 30 years his junior. Whatever the reason, the now-retired partner has thwarted a second bid by his ex-wife to invalidate a prenuptial agreement and collect a share of the annual retirement payments that he receives from the firm.

The Appellate Court of Connecticut, in a decision released on Thursday, affirmed a divorce judgment between retired Wachtell partner Peter McKenna, now 72, and Roberta Delente, a one-time model from Brazil who was working for an agency called “European Playmates” when the couple met in 1997. She was 32 at the time.

The divorce judgment left Delente, from whom McKenna sought a divorce less than a year after their wedding in August 1999, with virtually nothing from the marriage.

Let’s cut to the question that everyone is curious about: How big is McKenna’s (retirement) package?

UPDATE: And how hot is Roberta Delente? We’ve added a photo — as well as a link to the appellate court’s opinion, but that’s less exciting — after the jump.

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Pls Hndle Thx: But I’m in MENSA!

By Marin

Ed. note: Have a question for next week? Send it in to advice@abovethelaw.com.

Dear ATL,

We’re at NYLS and I’m in an argument with my friends for resumes for interviews with law firms.

I’m a member of MENSA and I think it’s okay to put “Member, MENSA” under my interests on my resume.  Some of my friends say it’s not okay.  What do you think?

– Smarter Than the Average Bear

Dear Smarter Than the Average Bear,

Let’s just cut to the chase here: listing  “Member, MENSA” on your résumé is incompatible with attending New York Law School. If you don’t have the IQ or EQ to realize  that, somebody needs to revoke your MENSA membership immediately and slash your tires with a Phi Beta Kappa key pin…

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Job of the Week: An In-House Gig in Chicago

By Above the Law

Legal hiring across the country is really picking up. This week’s job is another in-house position that is exclusive to Lateral Link. Lateral Link’s midwest practice is growing with several recent placements and a new recruiter in the Chicago office, John Thurmond. John is a former real estate attorney, with experience in-house at ORIX Real Estate Capital, Inc., and in the law firms Kirkland & Ellis LLP, Sonnenschein Nath & Rosenthal LLP and Schiff Hardin LLP. Prior to entering the legal industry, John was a Surface Warfare Officer in the United States Navy.

Position: Assistant General Counsel

Location: Chicago, IL

Description: Public company in the Chicago area is seeking a full-time attorney to serve as assistant general counsel. Attorney responsibilities would include SEC reporting; assisting General Counsel with negotiation and documentation of new investment products; working with portfolio managers to implement/manage existing investment products (including CDOs; and general in-house corporate work.

For more details, please see position #6696 on the Lateral Link website, or contact John Thurmond at jthurmond@laterallink.com. If you are not currently a Lateral Link member, you can sign up for free at www.laterallink.com.

A Pair of Craigslist Jobs: Getting Screwed (Chicago and D.C.)

By David Lat

Ah, Craigslist — grand repository and central clearinghouse for crappy legal jobs. The job postings, seeking expensively-trained lawyers at wages that a Starbucks barista would find insulting, just keep on coming.

The latest laughable listing — which brings laughter, but also tears — comes from Chicago:

We are looking for a recent law school graduate to assist in our busy litigation practice. The position allows you to work with and learn from experienced litigators but also requires a great deal of administrative and clerical work. The successful candidate will work directly with an attorney and be intimately involved with every aspect of the day to day litigation process. This is an excellent opportunity to acquire a great deal of marketable experience in a short period of time.

The position is full time and pays $10.00 per hour. Please forward a resume if interested.

One tipster’s incredulous reaction: “Ten dollars an hour for law graduates who have taken the bar? This is in the Chicago legal market, of all places!”

Meanwhile, in D.C., there’s a Craigslist posting for summer associates who like to get screwed more literally than figuratively….

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Unemployed J.D. Goes on a Hunger Strike

By Elie Mystal

As of this writing, Ethan Haines, writer of the UnemployedJD blog, has gone 32 hours without food. I think the kid might be joking, but Haines said he is going on a hunger strike — to convince law schools to be more transparent about the employment options of graduates, before the schools rope them into three years and six figures of debt.

He’s even served official notice of his hunger strike on five law schools, and he’ll put five more on notice today. From his self-styled media advisory:

On August 5, 2010, Ethan Haines, self-designated J.D. Class Representative, emailed an Official Notice of Hunger Strike to administrators of ten randomly selected law schools ranked in the Top 100 of the 2010 U.S. News & World Report’s annual rankings. These schools were selected because they stand to gain the most from keeping the current rankings structure in place.

Ethan intends to bring awareness to the concerns of law students and recent law graduates by having them addressed by law school administrators. Their primary concerns are inaccurate employment statistics, ineffective career counseling, and rising tuition costs. The strike was motivated by a recent American Bar Association (ABA) investigate Report, which concluded that educational leaders are unable to timely combat the adverse affects of U.S. News’ rankings on legal education.

It’s a worthy cause, even if Haines’s methods seem a little tongue-in-cheek. At the very least, unemployed law graduates with mountains of debt don’t have a lot of spare money lying around for food. Might as well put all those hunger pains to good use.

And maybe he’s not joking? Like all legitimate hunger strikers, Haines has a list of demands…

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Morning Docket: 08.06.10

By Elie Mystal

* While everybody else takes a Prop 8 victory lap, Ted Olson is back at work. [ABA Journal]

* BP’s static-kill operation looks like a success. We’re just waiting for the concrete to dry. That wasn’t so hard, was it? [Discover]

* Screw outsourcing; more firms should be doing crowdsourcing. [New York Times]

* A shareholder is not happy with the lawyers from the $3.2 billion Tyco settlement in 2007. [Forbes]

* Up here in the Northeast, the man who went on a shooting rampage at a Connecticut beer distribution company has been dominating the headlines. [New York Post]

* A former hot dog eating champ, Takeru Kobayashi, received probation for disturbing the hot dog eating championships on July 4th. He should have gotten a harsher sentence; the guy’s a real wiener. [CNN]

* Obama and Kagan will celebrate her confirmation at the White House today. [Chicago Sun-Times]

Here’s a celebratory video….

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Do Women in the Law Need to Get Thicker Skins?

By David Lat

Today’s confirmation of Elena Kagan as the fourth woman ever to serve on the U.S. Supreme Court is a milestone worth celebrating. For ladies in the law, things are looking up.

But female law students and lawyers still have complaints. Check out a recent query submitted to the Dear Prudence advice column over at Slate, by a correspondent calling herself “Livid but Lost Law Student”:

I am a female law student who is employed for the summer (and potentially for the school year) at a small firm that I’m really enjoying. The law office shares a floor of an office building with a bigger law firm, and my cubicle is “on the border.”

All of the attorneys at both firms are male, but at the other firm, the men are far from politically correct. I have two issues….

Let’s explore this law student’s “issues,” shall we?

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Non-Sequiturs: 08.05.10

By David Lat & Elie Mystal

Alleged shoplifter Shannon Marketic, in happier times.

* Congratulations to the best LGBT lawyers under 40! Check out the list — perhaps you know some of them? [National LGBT Bar Association]

* Speaking of gays in the law, if you’re obsessing over Judge Vaughn Walker’s sexual orientation, stop it. Just stop it. [Huffington Post]

* First Rudolph Giuliani’s daughter gets busted shoplifting beauty products, and now the same thing happens with a former Miss USA. The lesson: beauty products are way too expensive. [CBS / Crimesider]

* You think legal outsourcing is only going to affect the lives of junior associates? As Larry Ribstein explains, it’s very likely that outsourcing will lead to a fundamental change in the way we regulate lawyers and law firms. [Forbes]

* The only person who can get away with acting like Judge Judy is Judge Judy. [Bad Lawyer]

* Ann Althouse thinks peep-toe shoes are just fine — and has fabulous taste in shoes herself, by the way. [Althouse]

* How come all of the top philanderers are men? That’s just sexist. [Law and More]

Congratulations to Associate Justice Elena Kagan!

By David Lat

This should not come as a huge surprise, but Solicitor General Elena Kagan was just confirmed by the Senate as to be the 112th justice of the United States Supreme Court. Kagan, the first woman to serve as Solicitor General, is the fourth woman ever to serve on the Court.

CORRECTION: I replaced “as” with “to be” after receiving this from a former White House official: “I feel compelled to point out that the Senate confirmed Kagan TO BE the 112th justice, after which President Obama likely appointed her AS the 112th justice. Marbury, Madison, etc.”

The vote to confirm Kagan was 63-37. Check out C-SPAN for the full tally (scroll down). Ashby Jones has the highlights:

Fifty-eight Democrats and independents, as well as five Republicans, voted for Kagan. Thirty-six Republicans and one Democrat, Sen. Ben Nelson of Nebraska, voted against the nominee.

The five Republicans who supported Kagan were Sens. Susan Collins and Olympia Snowe of Maine, Lindsey Graham of South Carolina, Richard Lugar of Indiana and Judd Gregg of New Hampshire.

The current U.S. Supreme Court lineup (once Kagan is officially sworn in): Chief Justice John Roberts (Bush 43) and Justices Antonin Scalia (Reagan), Anthony Kennedy (Reagan), Clarence Thomas (Bush 41), Ruth Bader Ginsburg (Clinton), Stephen Breyer (Clinton), Samuel Alito (Bush 43), Sonia Sotomayor (Obama) and Elena Kagan (Obama).

UPDATE: In case you’re curious, President Obama’s prior SCOTUS nominee, Justice Sonia Sotomayor, was confirmed last year by a vote of 68-31, with nine Republicans in support. Three Republicans voted for Sotomayor but not Kagan: Lamar Alexander (Tenn.), Christopher Bond (Mo.), and Voinovich (Ohio). Scott Brown (Mass.) — who introduced Kagan at her hearings, by the way — voted against her (but wasn’t in the Senate yet for the Sotomayor vote). So did George LeMieux (Fla.), who replaced Mel Martinez (a pro-Sotomayor Republican).

After the Kagan vote, the Divine Miss K’s successor as Harvard Law School dean, Martha Minow, sent out a celebratory email at HLS….

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Fall Recruiting Open Threads: Vault 31 – 40 (2011)

By Elie Mystal

We’ve gotten away from plowing through the latest Vault Rankings, but fear not. Your firm is coming up soon.

We’ve been through the top 30 firms. But now we’re getting into a group of firms that really utilized the cost-cutting measures of salary cuts and layoffs to weather the recession of 2009. Did these guys take a big prestige hit? Not really. Here’s the next batch of firms:

31. Mayer Brown
32. Milbank
33. Paul Hastings
34. Akin Gump
35. Allen & Overy
36. Fried Frank
37. Irell & Manella
38. Freshfields
39. Orrick, Herrington & Sutcliffe
40. Willkie Farr & Gallagher

Just off the top of my head, does anybody else think that Irell is coming in a little low?

Anyway, let’s get into these firms…

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The Verdict in the Bluegrass State’s Sordid Sports Trial is In: Karen Sypher is Guilty

By Kashmir Hill

Rick Pitino and Karen Sypher

Just because a man deposits on your leg doesn’t mean you can take him to the bank. The jury in the Karen Sypher eight-day trial began deliberating yesterday at 3 p.m., and finished up today after about five hours — an eternity in Rick Pitino time.

While it may have been embarrassing for Louisville basketball coach Pitino to testify about his terrible sexual performance, it led to Sypher being found guilty of extortion, lying to federal agents, and witness retaliation. The jury is still out on whether she’s guilty of giving creepy head.

Sypher guilty on all counts [WAVE 3]
Sypher found guilty on all counts [Kentucky Sports Radio]

Earlier: The Bluegrass State’s Sordid Sports Trial (Or: University of Louisville basketball coach Rick Pitino must really hate Karen Sypher)

Quote of the Day: But What Does Justice KENNEDY Think of BUBBLE DREAMS?

By David Lat

At the moments notice of PROP 8 DEATH I instantly began to write music. BUBBLE DREAMS FOREVER! FULL EQUALITY! THIS IS JUST THE BEGINNING!

REJOICE and CELEBRATE gay communities and straight all over the world. Our voices are being heard! Loud! SCREAM LOUD AMERICANOS!

– Lady Gaga, responding on Twitter to Chief Judge Vaughn Walker’s ruling in Perry v. Schwarzenegger.

More Summer Associate Classes With 100% Offer Rates

By Kashmir Hill

Some summer associates are ending their summers on a very positive note. Quite a few firms have already informed law school students that after this summer fling, they’re interested in a more serious relationship.

Since our last round-up of offices extending offers to 100% of their summer associates, we’ve heard from a few more contented summers…

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Career Center: A Good Summer at Kasowitz

By Above the Law

Thanks to the over 500 people who responded to our summer associate survey and to all the firms who participated in distributing the survey to their summer associates. We will be rolling out the updated Career Center Firm Snapshots in several weeks, but wanted to give you a sneak peak of some of the results.

Today we are highlighting the firm that had the highest response rate among summer associates: Kasowitz, Benson, Torres & Friedman, where 95 percent of summers responded. Based on the responses, we can tell that summer associates really enjoyed their summer at Kasowitz.

Summer associates raved about Kasowitz’s litigation training programs and felt that the firm really cares about training its “young lawyers to be top litigators.” In addition to working on “substantive” and “interesting” litigation work assignments, survey respondents had a great time at Yankees games and on a West Village Art Tour. While most large law firms have been trimming their summer program budgets, summer associates at Kasowitz were still enjoying $50 lunches and $100 dinners. They also attended a firm retreat at a country club in upstate New York.

Want to know more about the associate experience at Kasowitz Benson? Click here for the firm’s profile. And watch out for more summer program updates from the other Big Law Firms in the coming weeks!

Kasowitz Benson [Career Center profile]