Courtship Connection, Law Schools, Romance and Dating

Courtship Connection: Get Lost in Those Brown Eyes, Please

A law student said this picture best captured the feeling of his date

Last week, we had two more blind dates in the swampy city: a pair of lawyers and a pair of law students.

Both dates left me feeling that I really need to start recruiting more candidates from outside of the legal field. (Note to Lat and Elie: Could you get your colleagues to send some Dealbreaker and Fashionista readers my way?)

The late 20s-early 30s lawyers I sent out both went to school in Boston, both described themselves as Dem-GOP mixes (she said she was a hybrid, he ‘fessed up to being a libertarian), and both named Scalia as their man at One First Street. Asked to describe themselves in three words, she gave me an alliterative four — “sweet, sarcastic, smart, social” — and he used slashes with abandon — “Spunky/energetic, funny, old school/1950s-ish, conservative.”

I sent them to Proof wine bar on a Tuesday night. Here’s what happened next….

He tells me:

I was super psyched for this date. I had never been on a blind date and actually have only been on 2 dates in the past year (yes, there’s a story behind that, I’m not a freak). Attempting to look my best after a typically soul-crushing, eye-hollowing day of firm life, believe it or not I skipped out of work early so I could do some pre-date pumping of iron at the gym, shower and shave.

This sounds promising, right? Sex-starved and cleaned up. He had definitely primed himself to have a good time:

Entering Proof, the appointed rendez-vous point, I felt my nerves kick up, but I quickly spotted my lady lawyer with the [XXX] and approached. It was go time. I’m sure I came off as nervous and awkward at first, but she took it in stride and we enjoyed several glasses of wine before walking about a half mile to grab a Belgian pint at Brasserie Beck (which was also on the way home for both of us). All in all, the date lasted 3+ hours and the conversation never lulled — vacations, family, career, her dog, our favorite places to go out in DC, my perhaps unhealthy love of certain undergrad bars, and upcoming soirees in DC each of us encouraged the other to attend.

The lady lawyer even sent me a mid-date Gchat saying I’d done well in my pairing. It worried me that she was on Gchat mid-date, but who am I to judge another’s desire to spend time in the G-spot?

She says:

Overall I think we at least had a better time than a lot of these date stories – and he even paid for the drinks (no doubt reading the first DC post). I totally assumed Kash would set me up with someone really creepy or someone I’ve already dated but he was definitely cute and fun. I admittedly gchatted Kash during the date to tell her she did okay. I’m not sure whether there’s something romantic there but I figure we’ll probably at least hang out at some point in the future as friends.

He describes their goodbye:

On a K street corner, following a brief embrace and peck on the cheek, the night ended with each of us going our separate ways after a one-way business card exchange (I don’t carry them—they lack utility when you got Friendster and myspace, righttttt????).

(I think/desperately hope that’s a joke.)

I cant remember what I wrote in my “application” but whatever attributes I told you I seek in my better half, she had ‘em: she was attractive, poised, classy, and had the kind of brown eyes a man could get lost in.

But not this man.


There’s one aspect in this game which a matchmaker can never arrange for but which, in my opinion, is the sine qua non of true love—the unquantifiable, indescribable, je ne sais quois that we refer to as “sparks,” “fireworks,” or maybe even “kismet.” My match and I lacked it—something which I believe was apparent to both of us almost immediately, if not instantaneously.

Okay folks, it’s a blind date! It’s strange and uncomfortable. I don’t really expect you to bed down right away. Speaking from experience, I’d say it takes two dates for the magic to happen. (And by magic, I mean chemistry, not bedding down. Save that for date three.)

Matchmaker Kash advice: Please go on a second date. Drink tequila. See what happens.

On to the next couple: little law students, 23 and 24, from different D.C. schools. They both seemed quirky. He named “Captain Planet” as his favorite legal character, and she hemmed and hawed between Bob Loblaw (from Arrested Development) and “the go-to attorney in It’s Always Sunny.” For his three words of self-description, he chose: “Awesome, Awesomer, and Awesomist. Oh yeah, and I’m a Scorpio.” She said she was “cautious, perceptive, low-maintenance, amusing alcoholic.” She told me via e-mail, “I hope you realize I tend to attract very story-worthy men.”

Awesomist also sent along this picture. It seems to have nothing to do with the date.

If nothing else, I like good stories. I sent them to La Tasca — a tapas and sangria place in Chinatown — on a Thursday night, knowing the place has nice happy hour specials for a pair of loan-strapped students. She said:

So! The date. We had an entertaining conversation over a few drinks (I was rolling with whiskey rocks, and he chose Blue Moon), and we commiserated over the 1L experience and cold calling (he’s a 2L at another DC school). He had some pretty funny stories about his 1L year, and he was kind enough to listen when I complained about the summer job market and such. I think we had a pleasant conversation, despite the fact that I revealed that I enjoy Blue Booking. He judged me appropriately. We bonded over our shared alcoholic tendencies and California roots, but there was no discussion of a second date or exchange of phone numbers, so we seemed to be on the same page about that. He picked up the tab like a gentleman, and we said goodbye.

Well, not very story-worthy this time. She continued:

Even though the sparks didn’t fly, I would definitely choose him for a game of beer pong or flip cup, and I think we’d have fun. On a side note, if the gentleman from one of your earlier posts is still available (you seemed to think that their “average” date should have resulted in another), I wouldn’t be opposed to giving this another go.

Translation: I was hoping to score a lawyer, not a law student.

Awesomist wrote:

Given the answers I used on the questionnaire, I was curious what Kash could possibly have used to pair me up with my date. Something tells me we didn’t have the same favorite legal character, or any of the other answers. See generally Captain Planet (He’s our hero); The West Wing (“I drink from the keg of glory, bring me the finest muffins and bagels in all the land”). I still don’t know what the criteria was, but I had an enjoyable time, so I can live without knowing.

Now you know, but may not be very impressed.

It was obvious early on that there was not going to be a second date. She was way prettier/kinder/smarter than me, and I was more into it than she was. Even my god complex couldn’t bridge the gap in that disparity. She was nice about it though, and we still ended up chatting for a couple of hours. She’s definitely someone I’d like to get to know better. Eventually she had to go to a party, so we hugged and she went one way while I went the other, where in the jungle I must wait until the dice read five or eight.

Well, at least the two of you now have an entry point for meeting people in the dating pool of another D.C. law school. Dive in!

Kash is an editor emeritus of Above the Law. She now spends her days at Forbes writing about privacy, technology and the law at The Not-So Private Parts. For a background on the creation of ATL Courtship Connection, see My Weird Hobby: Matchmaking Lawyers.

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