Even witches must pay full price for BAR/BRI.

Law school is expensive. We get it. Preparing for the bar exam is expensive too. We know.

What’s a law student to do? Taking out more loans is the obvious answer, but at a certain point, one cries out, “!No más!”

Some have turned to, for lack of a better word, begging — like this aspiring UNC law student, and this 3L at Arizona State. But their efforts were not well-received. In these troubled times, we all have our own financial burdens to bear.

Alas, one student at Temple Law School didn’t get the “no begging” memo. She sent out a Facebook invitation to almost 800 people, requesting their attendance at an event entitled “HELP [REDACTED] RAISE MONEY FOR THE BAR EXAM IN JULY!!!!”

Yes, she’s asking her law school classmates — some of whom are probably just as cash-strapped and debt-burdened as she is — to just give her money.

Or pay her for one of her magic spells. Because she’s a witch, you see….

'Brother, can you spare... $3,250?'

One of our tipsters explains: “I am a classmate of [Redacted] at Temple Law. On Tuesday night, I was floored when she sent this Facebook invitation to 785 of her closest Facebook friends, including me and many other law students.”

Here’s the message. We’ve replaced the supplicant’s name with the pseudonym “Wicca Girl,” for reasons that will soon become apparent.

HELP [WICCA GIRL] RAISE MONEY FOR THE BAR EXAM IN JULY!!!!

[Wicca Girl] invited you · Private Event

Time: Wednesday, July 27 at 8:00am – July 29 at 9:00pm

Created By: [Wicca Girl]

Hey Everyone,

I am calling all angels, and all good friends to help me pay for the Bar exam and the very expensive Bar Bri course. I promise to offer pro bono work to any friends who donate who may have legal issues in PA and NJ once I am admitted into the bar.

I have taken out student loans for undergrad school at the University of Pittsbrugh, where I got a dual B.A., at graduate school at Indiana University where I got my M.A.,… and now at Temple University of Law school for my last rounds of school. I have gotten scholarships to every school I have attended, but I still have to borrow money from the government.

Once I graduate I can no longer borrow money from the government, and cannot do it for the BAR exams. And private loans and co-signers seems to be out of the question. and really, I am tired of accumulating debt! I’m tryin’ to start MAKING THAT MONEY AS A LAWYER, WOOT WOOT!!!

I am hoping that some of my good friends can donate whatever they can spare, and think about the kindness I have shown to you, maybe I bought you dinner, maybe I cooked for you, maybe I helped you come up with a nice outfit, or bought you cool threads, maybe I got you a birthday shot, maybe I used to tip you really well, maybe I read your tarot cards for free, maybe I gave you bus fare, maybe I gave you some good good lovin, and never asked for anything to return. Or maybe you got approved for a bar loan and have an extra 10 bucks to spare, or you are already wealthy. Really, anything you give can help!!!! And if you don’t want to donate, I also do tarot readings, spells, and sell very cool enchanted vintage jewelry, and vintage clothing on ebay! Here are my auctions if you are interested in that!

http://shop.ebay.com/selochka/m.html?_trksid=p4340.l2562

Here is what you are paying for!

My sanity: priceless
the NJ Bar exam—$400 before April 1st
the PA Bar exam— $500 before April 15th
the fee for using a computer on both exams $200 before April 1st and April 15th respectively
the BarBri ridiculously expensive 2.5 month course—$3250

A total of $4350 that needs to materialize within 30 days!!!! Oh my goodness!!!!

Thank you all so much, and many loving blessings to you.

Please send donations with paypal to [Wicca Girl]@temple.edu.

This left us speechless. Fortunately, one of the message recipients had some thoughts and info:

[I]f I hadn’t vomited from the utter chutzpah of the request, I would have just three points to add:

1) She has gone on three vacations to Europe in the past year. The most recent was a trip to Spain for spring break, just two weeks ago.

2) Don’t forget to check out her eBay auctions. She’s offering such goodies as NARCISSUS beauty SELF-ESTEEM vanity CELIBACY spell CAST and APHRODITE sexy CURVES enhanced BUST & BOOTY spell CAST. For only $69.99, free shipping, and a money back guarantee, you won’t want to miss out!

3) There’s a word for people who solicit money in exchange for “good good lovin.” But most of them are smart enough to demand the money before they give the “good good lovin.”

Regarding point #2, you really must check out her complete eBay profile. Touting herself as an “experienced wicca of 8 years,” Wicca Girl is selling spells for penis enhancement ($69.99 and free shipping), weight loss ($59.99 and free EXPEDITED shipping), and cursing your enemies.

For that last item, the “SATANIC TRIPLE GODS ULTIMATE BLACK MAGIC HEX SPELL,” Wicca Girl touts her lawyerly background:

Not only am I a talented witch but I am also a very intelligent woman and well versed in mythology and different cultures. I have my Bachelor’s degree in English Literature and Russian, my Master’s Degree in Comparative Literature, and am getting my juris doctarate, Doctor of Jurisprudence, J.D. this semester. My background in law makes me very adept at understanding your karmic frequency and petitioning the gods and goddesses to give you gifts or exact justice on those who have inflicted pain upon you….

Although I am a very busy woman, I love spell-casting. As a lawyer it is relaxing and peaceful to meditate, and I feel so good being able to help other people! This is why I became a lawyer! Every spell I do is done with love for the petitioner. I only practice white magick, even in retribution spells. I do have one black magic spell listed, but the risk of danger is included in the expensive price.

Expensive indeed: $100,000. If she can sell this spell, Wicca Girl will be well on her way towards paying off law school.

Selling spells for money seems rather… shady. Could this raise character-and-fitness issues for Wicca Girl down the road? Unauthorized practice of… witchcraft?

And why is she trying to make money by selling spells to the public? Why not cut out the intermediate step? If Wicca Girl truly has magical powers, why can’t she just conjure up the $4,350, and make her debts disappear?

P.S. Elie is out today, but if he had been in, I would have asked him to write this post. Truth be told, I’m a little superstitious — and part of me is worried about poking fun at a witch. If I start experiencing hallucinations, one of the hallmarks of the SATANIC TRIPLE GODS ULTIMATE BLACK MAGIC HEX SPELL, I’ll let you all know forthwith.

P.P.S. Shameless plug for ATL advertisers: you have lots of options when it comes to bar prep, and not all of them cost $3,250. See, e.g., BarMax and Themis Bar Review.

UPDATE (7:30 PM): Sadly, Wicca Girl has removed the magic spells from her eBay profile; only fashion items remain.

Also, I seem to have a toothache. Have I been hit with the SATANIC TRIPLE GODS ULTIMATE BLACK MAGIC HEX SPELL? I’m serious….

selochka items [eBay]

Earlier: Would-Be Law Student Solicits Donations to Attend UNC Law School
Mean Blog Comments End Quest to Go to Law School for Free
Small Firm Lawyers Balk at ASU 3L’s Request for Sponsorship
Will You Help Clothe a Law Student?


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