You can keep your Siri fantasies, I'll hold out for an iChristina Hendricks.

* Sketchy lawyer billboard photo essay. [Copyranter]

* I bet most Congress people would find a way to lose money in the stock market even if they were allowed to trade based on their inside information. [Politico]

* Siri, the iPhone’s voice-activate software that comes in a pleasing female voice, is apparently a sexist male fantasy. Maybe, but that male has a pretty boring fantasy life. I don’t want my fantasy iSlave to find me coffee, I want her to bring it right to my desk. Naked. And then have sex with me. And then bring me another cup of coffee because the first one got cold. [Not So Private Parts / Forbes]

* Jerry Sandusky’s lawyer seems to be a real odd ball. [ESPN]

* Does this mean Samsung has been watching me through my television all this time? I swear I watch Cinemax movies for the tight plotlines. [NPR]

* Dude, we’re running out of Scotch. WE ARE RUNNING OUT OF SCOTCH! Somebody do something!! [Huffington Post]


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16 thoughts on “Non-Sequiturs: 12.02.11

  1. Guestconomist says:

    A scotch shortage?  Is there a governmentally-imposed price ceiling I’m unaware of? That bottle of Johnny Blue might get a little more pricey, but we won’t run out. 

  2. Ewhfwiufhwh says:

    “Siri, the iPhone’s voice-activate software that comes in a pleasing female voice, is apparently a sexist male fantasy. Maybe, but that male has a pretty boring fantasy life. I don’t want my fantasy iSlave to find me coffee, I want her to bring it right to my desk. Naked. And then have sex with me. And then bring me another cup of coffee because the first one got cold.”

    Ha!  Comedy gold.  And now back to this rog…

    • Asslobster Roll says:

      WTF? Kash had to get some feminist Brooklyn chick to phone in the article for her? When I want asslobster, I want authentic asslobster, dammit!

  3. Go Guest Young Man says:

    1)  The new commenting thing sucks.

    2)  If we run out of scotch, I will quit my job and argue for nuclear war on all of Asia and Latin America. full time.

    3)  “I bet most Congress people would find a way to lose money in the stock
    market even if they were allowed to trade based on their inside
    information.”

    Uh, what?  “Congress people” are currently allowed to trade on their inside information and they make tremendous amounts of money because of it.  It is one of the top reasons most “Congress people” are rich regardless of whether they were before they were elected.

  4. Memo says:

    LOL, LadyDUI went to Stacy’s law school, class of 2006. maybe even the same year?

  5. Guest says:

    I didn’t think it possible, but Disqus apparently could get worse and did.

  6. Ps2une.com says:

    This is a Very Good Post ;o)
    http://www.Ps2tune.com

  7. Juicy Fruit says:

    New format sucks cuckold cock. 

  8. Guest says:

    What new format?

  9. Sexual Harassment Panda says:

    Elie talking about sex slaves makes me a saaaad panda…

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