Caption Contest Winner: Columbia Law Provides Quality Street Construction Materials

With the weather here in New York today, this Columbia Law umbrella is looking more useful than ever before:

Oh, before I forget, I have a little note to anybody who walks around on bright, hot days using an umbrella as a parasol: go f*** yourself. No, I mean that seriously, please take your heavy vinyl rain protection that you’re using because you don’t know the difference between it and a pretensious, lightweight sunshade and shove it up your backside. For the love of God, buy a hat or something….

Really, to win a T-shirt on Above the Law, all you have to do is make a joke about how doing just about anything will result in your law school calling you “employed.” It’s amazing that law schools, even respectable ones, have allowed their own statistics to become this kind of a running joke. Here’s our winning caption, and it really wasn’t all that close:

Fully employed graduate working in advertising.

I feel like all these contests should be warm-up contests for the ultimate contest “Most Interesting Use of an ATL T-Shirt.” The winner will get to name my first born (kidding) or name Lat’s first born (… also kidding).

Earlier: Caption Contest Finalists: Columbia Law Provides Quality Street Construction Materials