Law Schools, Vermin / Rodents / Pests

When The Kids Are Away, The Rats Will Play. No, Seriously, There Are Rats Infesting A Law School.

Get these m*****f****** rats out of my m*****f****** law school...

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We’ve written a lot about therapy dogs for stressed out law students. But maybe law schools need to start hiring therapy cats to keep law students and administrators from getting the freaking bubonic plague.

Just because the students are away doesn’t mean that law schools shut down. There is still work to be done — not necessarily by the well-paid professors — but by the administrators that make law schools run.

At one California law school, administrators are being forced to do their jobs after cleaning their workspace from rat droppings….

This email from an assistant Dean at UCLA School of Law just breaks your heart. You hate it when people have to beg for basic sanitary conditions in their workspace. I mean, you just never want to have to write the subject line below (names have been changed to protect the innocent):

Subject: RE: Rats in the school of law
Importance: High

Dear [HelpUS],

[Forsaken] is out on vacation so I apologize if this is not your area. As of this morning, I do not believe anyone has been out to the law school to address the rat problem in multiple offices. We need to have traps set and the work spaces cleaned. Is this something that your office coordinates or should I be talking with someone else? We first reported this problem on June 28.

Sincerely,

[Sam L.]

Honestly, I’d rather have some snakes at my job than rats. Rat eating snakes might be dangerous, but at least they’re not so freaking gross.

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A back and forth ensued (you can check out the chain on the next page) — which I think is totally unacceptable. If I call somebody and say, “There are rats where I work,” then all I want to hear is, “You ain’t got no problems, I’m on the motherf**ker. Go back in there, chill them ni**as out, and wait for the Wolf GIANT CAT OF DEATH who should be coming directly.”

Instead, our guy has to hear a story about Terminix and traps and the like. Facilities managers claim that they brought in exterminators on July 3rd, but clearly that didn’t work, because the assistant dean sent out that email on July 5th. A tipster adds:

My coworker found rat droppings on her desk. We are all horrified.

Indeed. It’s horrific.

In any event, I’m sure that UCLA will have the problem cleared up by the time employers stop by. There are enough law schools in Southern California that nobody should have to risk getting rabies to fill their class.

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On the next page, check out maintenance’s weak ass solution to this problem and what appears to be UCLA’s “blame the victim” strategy of pest control….

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