This email was sent by a classmate, who thinks that the people in room 603 were actually worse off. We’ll call him “Y U Mad Bro”:

With all due respect Mr. Time Cop I have to disagree. I believe that the proctors mistake, if anything, significantly hurt the students in 603 because it allowed them to waste much more time on the multiple choice thus leaving far less time to do the essays which were worth many more points anyway. I would allow Professor [I Should Be In Bermuda By Now] to deal with the situation as he sees fit and assign grades based on the performance he thinks each student deserves. The fact that the proctors did not collect the multiple choice was certainly not an advantage and probably a disadvantage to some students. That is what Professor Bermuda worried about. Thus, I would not be angry you had less time on the multiple choice, I would be happy you had less time to waste on it and more time on the essays.

I just think there are bigger fights to fight and professor Bermuda will deal with the situation as he sees fit.

— Y U Mad Bro

And now for Time Cop’s final descent into total madness:

With all due respect, Mr. Mad Bro, but I don’t think I’m the only person who is not surprised that someone who was been conferred the benefit of having two extra hours to think about his multiple choice answers would not want that portion to be discounted. It is my fault for even including room 603 in my original email. Save for the ethical and moral soul who reported such an egregious advantage to the proper authorities, it is to be expected that the rest of you would defend your advantage tooth and nail. Please do everyone a favor and go fight your bigger fights. Do not bother with us small-minded folk who dream of fairness on law school exams, and who believe that more time is an advantage, not a disadvantage. If you neglected your essays, you have only yourself to blame. You knew the instructions and should have reported it to the proctor at once when the multiple choice was not collected, but since you did not, the very least you should have done was move on after the allotted time and focus on your essays. The fact that you say your time in the last two hours was divided at all between essays an multiple choice proves my point that you had more time to perfect your multiple choice answers, thereby giving you an unjust an irrevocable advantage over those of us in 601. Kindly do not respond to this as your ideas and answers fall on deaf ears.

He then asked if Y U Mad Bro had the slightest idea what a moral and ethical principle is, then he demanded that somebody named “Wendy” furnish him with a bat.

Somebody needs to get this kid some Prozac so that he might “dream of fairness” before he starts writing angry letters to the Department of Education about the egregious moral failures of his classmates.

Absent putting this guy in a medically induced coma, there is only one other way to solve this. I know you know what I’m thinking: Octagon, Pay Per View, two classes enter, one exam format remains. It’s not an inconvenience, it’s an injustice.


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