One of my favorite things to do as a kid was to go camping. We always used to stock up on supplies in some small town, head out into the woods, and go fishing and hunting. It was an idyllic way to spend a summer weekend.

Just kidding. I stole that story from a friend. I hated camping. People only lived in Sherwood Forest because they were too poor and stupid to hack it in the city. Plus the bugs — bugs that walk, bugs that jump, bugs that can’t be killed with a thump. And for what? Black people respect nature from afar, like in a Jeep with a rifle and binoculars afar. It’s the white people who want to get all up in nature’s face and mess with it. “Ooh, look at the bear Elie, isn’t it beautiful??” You tell me how beautiful it is when it has your head in a toothy vise-grip.

I did like the small towns though. That’s when I felt all David Attenborough: “Bill’s bait and tackle probably hasn’t had an African-American customer since the 54th Massachusetts came through these parts. Let’s see what happens when I go in to purchase one of their dried beef snacks.”

I say all this because I think I would have enjoyed a summer trip to Washington Island, Wisconsin this summer. It seems like a kind of small town tourist trap, and that’s exactly my speed. Also, it’s the kind of place where they eat all the lawyers, so I think I’d be blessedly free of all the commenters for a little while…

Our picture for this caption contest comes courtesy of Accidental Flatlander. It’s a really cool food blog that helps you plan where and what to eat when you are vacationing. In Wisconsin, lawyers are on the menu (click to enlarge):

That’s the business. I’d have totally gone into that store.

But not into the surrounding lakes, rivers, and streams. Eww. How gross is it to wash yourself “upstream” of where you relieve yourself? How do you know somebody else isn’t relieving himself upstream of you?

Same rules as always: submit possible captions in the comments. Please try to be funny. We’ll choose our favorites — with preference given to those with a legal bent — and then let you vote for the best one.

Please submit your entries by THURSDAY, AUGUST 29 at 11:59 p.m. (Eastern time). Thanks!


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