Canada, Food, Law Schools, Weirdness

Student With Weird ‘Other People Eating’ Disorder Harangues Entire Law School

Pineapple, or deadly weapon against learning? You be the judge.

In early returns from the 2013-2014 academic year, the leading theme seems to be the revenge of the stuck-up law student. Usually we work with stories where law students engage in some kind of bad behavior that is humorous to the rest of us. But this year it feels like the good stories are about the law students getting their panties in a bunch over the (not so) bad behavior of others.

We’ve already had the NYU guy being a whiny little bitch about people hanging out late in his building. Note to that guy: things might get a little loud after the ATL/Kaplan Bar Crawl tonight. Buy some earplugs.

Yesterday we got a slew of tips from Osgoode Hall Law students in Toronto. One of the classmates sent around a nasty school-wide email, complaining about people eating in class. I’m telling you, these are the kinds of kids who have a nervous breakdown when the air conditioning comes on during the bar exam.

On the positive side, the Osgoode Hall students have taken collective action to defend one our most important and delicious fruits…

I think this Osgoode Hall “Food Nazi” was trying to go for snarky or sarcastic or something. But really she just comes off as oversensitive and cray-cray. Here’s how she closes (you can see the full email on the next page):

To put it politely, your constant eating/chewing/crunching/the SMELL is wholly distracting the rest of us from learning. If I weren’t being polite, I would say it’s f**king annoying and disrespectful and shows a complete lack of judgement and poor taste.

But I’m being polite, so I won’t say that.

Hahahaha, ha ha, ahh… go jump in a lake. Seriously, learn to f**king focus. In the real world, you’re going to be asked to perform through all sorts of trying circumstances. It’s part of “living with other humans.” It might be annoying if someone is crunching on a Dorito in class, but overreacting in this matter shows a total lack of mental toughness.

Food Nazi has specific foods that really piss her off:

Food selection: if you are so unable to time manage appropriately, and/or you are utterly incapable of waiting for the break to eat, may I be so bold as to recommend to you what not to bring as your dish of the day?

Tuna sandwiches: they stink up the entire room
Deli sandwiches: see above
Apples, pineapples and other crunchy fruit: your helpless classmates are here to study. We want to hear the professor, not the gnashing of your teeth and the crunch crunch crunch
Chips: Really? I mean, really? Refer to above point about the noise. But to add, you’re dying of hunger, and you choose to stuff your face with a bag of chips? Out of all available food options? It’s not very healthy, you know.

“Bold” doesn’t begin to describe it. Do you remember the Sopranos episode where Meadow’s roommate has a conniption about someone eating chicken cacciatore on the subway? Do you remember how Meadow’s roommate ended up pulling out her own hair and had to be medicated? That’s the kind of road you are going down when you start dictating what can and cannot be eaten in your presence.

Also, what kind of mutated Canadian pineapples is she eating that are crunchy? The only way a pineapple prevents you from hearing a professor is if a classmate starts hitting you over the head with one.

Actually, I don’t have to defend pineapples. Lots of other sites of picked up on this crazy email, but here we have the only appropriate response from Osgoode students:

Food Nazi also pissed off the Osgoode Hall administrators. They evidently didn’t take her side that eating a bag of chips amounts to a terrorist attack on learning:

Dear Members of the Osgoode Community,

A number of students have raised concerns about an e-mail that was sent to some members of the Osgoode community earlier today. In the main, the concerns relate to a lack of civility in the communication. In addition, it appears as though the e-mail also runs afoul of York’s Guidelines and Procedures for Electronic Mail (specifically, the prohibition on “constructing and transmitting an e-mail message so that it appears to be from someone else”).

I am writing to assure you that this matter is being taken very seriously by the Law School and that an investigation is currently ongoing.

I think it appropriate to remind all students of their obligations under the York’s Code of Student Rights and Responsibilities, see here:

In particular, the Code expressly requires all students to uphold an atmosphere of civility.

In addition, students should also note that their use of university computing facilities, including Air York and university e-mail accounts, is subject to the duties and responsibilities set out in the University’s Computing Policies, available here:

Complaints that those policies have been violated are to be dealt with under the procedures found in the Code of Student Rights and Responsibilities. Consequently, a violation of the computing policies may not only result in a suspension of computing privileges but may also be treated as a form of misconduct that is subject to discipline.

To those students who received this e-mail, I apologize that our e-mail system was used in this manner.

Hopefully Food Nazi read this email from the safety of a food-free panic room so she could learn the lesson of this incident.

UPDATE (3:15 p.m.): A tipster informs us that the email appeared to have been sent out by one “Jessica White,” but “there is no Jessica White at Osgoode, so it must be from some sort of spoofed email address that somehow had access to the course’s listserv.” This is presumably why the administration email cites the school’s prohibition on “constructing and transmitting an e-mail message so that it appears to be from someone else.”

Click below for her full email. I’m going to grab a taco….

(hidden for your protection)

comments sponsored by

Show all comments