Work-Life Balance Is NOT Work-Fun Balance

Work-life balance is important because it keeps us happy, healthy, and prevents small problems from becoming big ones.

A nonlawyer friend of mine has been very busy this past year. Due to a sudden layoff and a lack of local jobs, she had to find work in a different state. Her commute is driving six hours each way. She spends the week at work and weekends working from home and preparing for the week ahead. Any leftover time was spent with her husband and children.

Over a month ago, her mother called to say that she felt a lump in her breast and she wanted to have it checked out. My friend said that she couldn’t drive back home just for a simple office checkup so she asked her mother to find someone who could make house calls or find a doctor who is available on weekends. When they couldn’t find anyone else, my friend reluctantly asked for a day off, but it was a month in advance to make sure that any impact on her work performance was minimal.

A month passed and my friend and her mother went to the hospital for a biopsy and an ultrasound. When everything was done, the doctor refused to give any specifics and said to wait for the test results. But my friend saw the ultrasound photos and they looked like the grim images she saw on the internet.

A few days later, my friend learned that her mother had Stage 3 breast cancer.

Most young professionals start their careers wanting to rise to the top. But later on, something happens that makes people think (or re-think) what is most important in life. And that’s when they start to think about work-life balance.

Last week, there was a spirited discussion about whether there is a place for work-life balance in law practice. A legal recruiter who bears a striking resemblance to Sensei John Kreese says in this post that we lawyers do not practice law to achieve work-life balance. Work-life balance is for the weak. Here, in the courtroom, in Biglaw: Your career path confronts you. Success requires commitment. Commitment demands no work-life balance.

If Sensei Kreese had his own law firm, associates would be required to recite this mantra before every firm meeting to demonstrate their “commitment”:

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Friends do not exist in this law firm, do they?
NO, PARTNER!
Family does not exist in this law firm, does it?
NO, PARTNER!
Fun does not exist in this law firm, does it?
NO, PARTNER!
What do we practice here?
THE WAY OF JUSTICE, SIR!
And what is that way?
BILL FIRST, SETTLE HARD, NO MERCY SIR!
I can’t hear you!
BILL FIRST, SETTLE HARD, NO MERCY SIR!

The chest-thumpers like Sensei Kreese and his curmudgeon cheerleaders seem to think that wanting work-life balance is codespeak for wanting to have fun playing golf and stuff. They justify their rants by claiming that tough love rhetoric is needed because law practice is a brutally competitive race where others will sweep the leg in order to win. Those who can’t hack it will be out of commission.

Yes, work-life balance means enjoying life and having fun once in a while. But it’s more than that. The life part of the work-life balance equation also has its bad moments. We need time do things to keep ourselves in shape mentally and physically — like exercise, cook and eat healthy foods, and do something to reduce stress and blood pressure. And once in a while, we need time to deal with life’s curveballs, struggles, and tragedies.

At job interviews, requesting or even discussing work-life balance is taboo, especially for young or non-established attorneys. We have to show that we’re the best around and nothing’s going to ever keep us down. We tell employers that we are willing to spend cruel summers in the office to show our commitment. On the other hand, employers claim that they believe in work-life balance but it might be superficial. I sometimes wish that both employers and employees would be upfront about work-life balance, but I’d have better luck catching a fly with chopsticks. Because when money, careers, and business are at stake, both sides have to tell the other what they want to hear and hope that everything works out on its own.

Work-life balance should not be confused with work-fun balance. There should be some time to have fun outside the office, but we understand that it is a low priority in this business. Instead, we should try to have fun doing our work. Those who enjoy law practice do so because there are regular opportunities to learn something new. Unlike doing mindless work like waxing cars, sanding floors, painting fences, and painting houses, all of which teach absolutely nothing.

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But work-life balance is important because it keeps us happy, healthy, and prevents small problems from becoming big ones. As for my friend, she plans to spend more time with her mother. She will accompany her to the doctor’s office for further testing, chemotherapy sessions, and possibly surgery. Hopefully, they will use this time together to have a heart-to-heart talk and to reminisce about the good times they had.


Shannon Achimalbe was a former solo practitioner for five years before deciding to sell out and get back on the corporate ladder. Shannon can be reached at sachimalbe@excite.com.