All I Want For Christmas Is A Baby (Via Surrogacy)

How much does it cost to have a baby through surrogacy, and why is it so expensive?

holiday Christmas baby kidAs many of us prepare to celebrate the most famous surrogacy of all (hopefully Mary had a good ART attorney), it’s a good time to talk about how expensive having a baby through surrogacy can be. By most estimates, surrogacy in the United States runs around $100,000 or more. And while the U.S. is known for top-notch fertility clinics and states with supportive surrogacy laws, the price tag drives prospective parents to some shady destinations. In turn, that means some parents get stuck in foreign countries with their surrogate-carried newborns, or their embryos held hostage in those places.

Why Is Surrogacy So Expensive? In short, there are a lot of people to pay. The medical expenses for the in vitro fertilization (IVF) portion alone can vary greatly depending on the clinic. And while going to a first-rate clinic can bring high success rates, it also comes with high costs. On top of the clinic/medical costs, most intended parents have to, you know, pay someone to carry and deliver the baby. A lucky few do have an “altruistic” carrier who won’t charge, but for the vast majority of folks, this means paying a matching service or agency to find a kind young woman to act as your gestational carrier (aka surrogate).

Market compensation for surrogacy varies, but generally runs in the $20,000 to $40,000 range for first-time surrogates. Often a bonus of $5,000 per additional child is offered to carry multiples (aka twins, triplets, octuplets, etc.). But that’s just the base compensation. The surrogate also generally receives compensated benefits like reimbursement for travel expenses, a maternity clothes allowance, life insurance, lost wages, child care (for her other kids) and housekeeping during times of bed rest, and reimbursement for her pregnancy-related medical expenses, including the hospital bill for the delivery.  Obviously, being pregnant and delivering a baby can be a burdensome experience, and surrogates deserve to be compensated what the market will bear.

What Could Help? Having a surrogacy-friendly employer is a huge advantage. Although these are still few and far between, American Express just stepped up their game by offering increased benefits to their employees who hope to be parents. In addition to upping their paid parental leave to five months for both full and part-time employees, American Express announced that they will provide up to $35,000 in adoption and/or surrogacy benefits, “with a maximum of two such ‘events’ per employee.” That is a significant benefit for those hoping to start their family by means of surrogacy.

What If We Aren’t Wealthy? Why would you even want kids then? Just kidding, of course. There are some other options. First, there are the traditional methods for digging up cash such as a home equity loan or borrowing against/cashing out a 401(k) (consult your tax adviser first!). There are also finance companies popping up, such as CapexMD and Prosper Healthcare Lending, focused specifically on providing infertility financing.

For gay dads, the non-profit Men Having Babies offers its Gay Parenting Assistance Program or “GPAP” financial assistance program. Applicants can receive cash grants and discounts – or even free services – from surrogacy matching agencies, fertility clinics, and assisted reproductive technology attorneys.

Other options, besides begging parents (they do want to be grandparents after all, don’t they?!), is to get creative. Some couples, such as the adorable Ben and Erik, have started social media fundraising efforts.

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The price tag for surrogacy is unlikely to come down substantially any time soon. And frankly, it’s important that surrogates do have the ability to freely negotiate a generous price in exchange for the service they provide.  So for those would-be parents who are struggling to find the funds to have children, my advice–in addition to staying on Santa’s nice list–is to get creative and try some non-traditional routes. The reward can be… a very expensive human to take care of.


Ellen TrachmanEllen Trachman is the Managing Attorney of Trachman Law Center, LLC, a Denver-based law firm specializing in assisted reproductive technology law, adoption, and estate planning, and Co-Director of Colorado Surrogacy, LLC, a surrogacy matching and support agency. You can reach her at babies@abovethelaw.com.

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