White-Collar Crime

Kaiser's Guide to the ABA White-Collar Conference

Understand your conference goals... and then let loose and have fun meeting new people.

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Night_architecture_-_South_Beach,_MiamiThe ABA’s White-Collar Conference is in Miami next week. It’s like White-Collar prom, Spring Break, and a half week of your third year of law school rolled into one!

In a good way.

Sort of.

This is the 31st year for the conference and it seems to grow each year. Last year there were more than 1100 lawyers registered and seemingly twice that number who weren’t registered for the conference, but went to the parties anyway.

In celebration of the upcoming conference, I’ve put together ABA White Collar Conference Bingo board for things you’re likely to hear or see at the Conference (it’s also available at at this link). The first person to get a Bingo wins the Conference!

And, if you find me at the conference and give me your completed Bingo sheet, a brief explanation of where you saw each item, and a business card, I’ll send you a KaiserDillon PLLC water bottle. Because you only got three water bottles last holiday season.

But, less frivolously, it seems there are growing numbers of firms sending senior associates to the Conference for its networking and/or educational opportunities. Some people are fresh out of the government and going to the conference for the first time. In case you, gentle reader, want advice on this unique conference experience, here are my tips for navigating the ABA’s White-Collar Conference. As always, your mileage may vary and there’s a decent chance I’m going to the Conference wrong.

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(1) Develop relationships; don’t shotgun business cards

Let’s be honest, you’re going to the conference to get work. It’s ok, most of us are. That we get to hang out with friends in Miami at 1 a.m. is lagniappe.

But be realistic. You’re not going to get work just by showing up at the conference. I’m largely of the view that there’s not a lot of business development point in that conference. Set your goals and expectations low.

Realize that you aren’t going to get work by throwing business cards into other people’s hands. Instead, try to develop relationships. You may be the kind of person who can form a strong bond with someone that will immediately lead to a referral while standing near a pool in the dark, sweating too much because you haven’t taken your summer suits out of storage yet, as you sip a drink that’s mainly pineapple juice. I’m not that kind of person. I don’t think anyone really is.

Instead, recognize that some people you meet you’ll click with. Some you won’t. Meet a few people you click with at the parties, then follow up. Hang out with them later at a meal. Or, if they live in your city or a city you visit often, hang out over a meal after the conference. After a few years, you may get work from them.

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Unless you do something that no one else does. If you only represent people with leopard bite cases, just put your card in as many hands as you can. No one knows where to send a leopard bite case.

(2) Drink

Some people say you shouldn’t drink at business events. I disagree. This feels needlessly cautious. Unless you don’t drink normally, drink the alcohol. Time went into planning the specialty cocktails; it would be a pity not to appreciate that effort. If, at the Collora party, there’s a new cocktail called “Shape Fate,” drinking a few of them can’t possibly break bad.

Alcohol isn’t the problem, being an outlier is the problem. Don’t be the person really drunk at the 5 p.m. reception. That’s embarrassing for everyone. (Relatedly, don’t come to the 5 p.m. reception on an empty stomach.)

Instead, drink, but try to stay at the same level of intoxication as the people you’re hanging out with. If everyone else is a little silly and singing Garth Brooks, you’ll be better off joining in. For lots of reasons.

Strong relationships can be built doing slightly embarrassing things at 2 a.m. You should try to build strong relationships.

(3) Don’t worry

Finally, don’t worry too much. You aren’t going to leave the conference with a new case. Don’t beat yourself up when that big referral doesn’t happen. You’re in Miami in March; life could be worse.

Maybe you didn’t RSVP for that party because you didn’t happen to have been invited. Go anyway. Odds are they won’t turn you away. People throw parties to make friends; no one makes friends by not letting people in. Smart lawyers know that life is long. The associate who doesn’t know anyone now can later be the woman with the $40 million-dollar book who is feeding a dozen lawyers at other firms. No one wants to put someone off.

Most of the people who practice in this space are good and interesting people. Ask someone to tell you a war story. Odds are he or she will. Odds are it’ll be really interesting.

On a warm night in Miami, after enough Shape Fates, that can be reward enough.

(Remember your Bingo card on the next page….)

Matt Kaiser is a white-collar defense attorney at KaiserDillon. He’s represented stockbrokers, tax preparers, doctors, drug dealers, and political appointees in federal investigations and indicted cases. His twitter handle is @mattkaiser. His email is mkaiser@kaiserdillon.com He’d love to hear from you if you’re inclined to say something nice.

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