Non-Sequiturs: 07.21.17

* Akie Abe, first lady of Japan, played Donald Trump so hard. She, evidently, pretended she didn't know how to speak English to avoid having to talk to our boor of a president. I'm telling you guys: World War III: this time the Axis powers are the good guys. [National Post] * On this day that Trump turns over his press team, it's worth mentioning that the media's war against Trump is doomed to fail. Honestly, this first press conference with Anthony Scaramucci just emphasizes the point. The media asked him two questions in a bunch of different ways: 1. Will you be nicer to us than the last guy? 2. Why does this administration suck? The answers were "sure" and "we're great," respectively. [The Guardian] * Walls don't just keep people out, they lock people in. Like East Germany before, the White House takes its first totalitarian step to... oh, they're just banning travel to North Korea. Honestly, that's a pretty solid idea. [CBS News] * Kentucky was ordered to pay $222,695 in legal fees to people who had to deal with Kim Davis's BS. [Louisville Courier-Journal] * Exxon fined $2,000,000 for "reckless disregard" for sanctions against Russia while current Secretary of State Rex Tillerson was in charge. In response, Exxon sued the U.S. Treasury Department, naming Treasury Secretary Steven Mnuchin as a defendant, arguing they had received a special carve-out. Everything is so dirty. [ABA Journal] * Remember when Republicans cried and complained and sniggered that Obama was a "Muslim" whenever he would bring over a Guantanamo detainee for trial in the U.S.? The Trump administration just brought over a Guantanamo detainee for trial in the U.S. This administration is very much like Linkin Park, just do what the black guy did but with white faces and more guitar, and people will like it. [New York Times] * Breitbart is fapping itself over Anthony Scaramucci, so I checked out Red State and found this gem: "Beating the filibuster just takes guts and a desire to win." The argument is that Republican leaders should not be afraid of a Democratic filibuster on health care, because if Republicans are strong they'll refuse to conduct any other business until health care gets a vote, and Democrats won't shut down the government to save Obamacare. Two points: (a) Republicans don't have 50 votes now, and (b) NOTHING would make Democrats happier than to shut down the entire Republican legislative agenda by making a principled stand defending the right to health care. But hey, if y'all think you have the "guts" to shut down the government in order to "win," by all means, bring it the eff on. [RedState]

Akie Abe, the latest foreigner to humiliate Trump. (Photo by Jorg Sarbach – Pool/Getty Images)

* Akie Abe, first lady of Japan, played Donald Trump so hard. She, evidently, pretended she didn’t know how to speak English to avoid having to talk to our boor of a president. I’m telling you guys: World War III: this time the Axis powers are the good guys. [National Post]

* On this day that Trump turns over his press team, it’s worth mentioning that the media’s war against Trump is doomed to fail. Honestly, this first press conference with Anthony Scaramucci just emphasizes the point. The media asked him two questions in a bunch of different ways: 1. Will you be nicer to us than the last guy? 2. Why does this administration suck? The answers were “sure” and “we’re great,” respectively. [The Guardian]

* Walls don’t just keep people out, they lock people in. Like East Germany before, the White House takes its first totalitarian step to… oh, they’re just banning travel to North Korea. Honestly, that’s a pretty solid idea. [CBS News]

* Kentucky was ordered to pay $222,695 in legal fees to people who had to deal with Kim Davis’s BS. [Louisville Courier-Journal]

* Exxon fined $2,000,000 for “reckless disregard” for sanctions against Russia while current Secretary of State Rex Tillerson was in charge. In response, Exxon sued the U.S. Treasury Department, naming Treasury Secretary Steven Mnuchin as a defendant, arguing they had received a special carve-out. Everything is so dirty. [ABA Journal]

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* Remember when Republicans cried and complained and sniggered that Obama was a “Muslim” whenever he would bring over a Guantanamo detainee for trial in the U.S.? The Trump administration just brought over a Guantanamo detainee for trial in the U.S. This administration is very much like Linkin Park, just do what the black guy did but with white faces and more guitar, and people will like it. [New York Times]

* Breitbart is fapping itself over Anthony Scaramucci, so I checked out Red State and found this gem: “Beating the filibuster just takes guts and a desire to win.” The argument is that Republican leaders should not be afraid of a Democratic filibuster on health care, because if Republicans are strong they’ll refuse to conduct any other business until health care gets a vote, and Democrats won’t shut down the government to save Obamacare. Two points: (a) Republicans don’t have 50 votes now, and (b) NOTHING would make Democrats happier than to shut down the entire Republican legislative agenda by making a principled stand defending the right to health care. But hey, if y’all think you have the “guts” to shut down the government in order to “win,” by all means, bring it the eff on. [RedState]

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