ACLU, Free Speech

ACLU Brief In John Oliver Case Is Stone-Cold Hilarious

ACLU Is Having So Much Fun, You Guys.

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Mr. Nutterbutter

When the Onion jokes that the ACLU was very, very excited about the astonishing amount of work they’re getting, it was clearly going to go down as one of those articles that’s more truth than satire. It’s pulling in money hand over fist and throwing itself into another fight every day.

But how you know the ACLU is really in the zone is how much joy the folks over there are taking in dunking all over their adversaries.

Stone. Cold.

Now the ACLU’s taking its joyful trash-talk from its social media account and placing it front and center in its briefs:

It is apt that one of Plaintiffs’ objections to the [John Oliver] show is about a human-sized squirrel named Mr. Nutterbutter, because this case is nuts. Which also begs the question: is Mr. Nutterbutter one of the 50 Doe Defendants included in this action?

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Mr. Nutterbutter, of course, is the giant squirrel who told coal baron Bob Murray to “Eat Shit, Bob” on national television, a sentence that would sound weird if it weren’t 2017 where absurdity holds sway. If you missed Nutterbutter’s appearance on Last Week Tonight With John Oliver a few weeks ago, well, here you go:

In an age where wealthy, powerful individuals are waging a covert war on journalism, Bob Murray is the guy running face first into a meat grinder and spoiling it for everybody. If there’s a guild of plutocrats plotting to take down journalism, Bob Murray is most certainly their Leeroy Jenkins.

It is a basic concept of free speech that you do not get to sue media organizations because you don’t like their coverage. However, this is apparently a difficult concept for Plaintiffs to grasp.

Excuse me while I watch this on a loop.

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Now, HBO doesn’t need any help with this case. Beyond having the better of the argument, they’re waist-deep in Game of Thrones money, and with that cash comes all the firepower that Williams & Connolly can level. So Jamie Lynn Crofts of ACLU-WV had freedom to have some fun with her amicus brief. And she took that opening:

“[A]fter the live taping, Defendant Oliver exclaimed to the audience that having someone in a squirrel costume tell Bob Murray to ‘Eat Shit’ was a ‘dream come true.’”3

FN3 Everyone is allowed to have dreams.

Even her headers spit hot fire:

2. Plaintiff’s Requested Injunction is Clearly Unconstitutional. You Can’t Get a Court Order Telling the Press How to Cover Stories, Bob.

And when Murray objects to Oliver comparing him to Dr. Evil:

And with regard to the Dr. Evil remark, 4 it should be remembered that truth is an absolute defense to a claim of defamation.

Now you’re just toying with this guy. Does the District of West Virginia (UPDATE: the Northern District of West Virginia specifically) have a mercy rule? Asking for a coal magnate.

Neal Katyal once said that, by and large, high-profile amici briefs are really about fundraising. To his mind, courts rarely need to rely on them, but they give organizations a publicity tool to raise awareness of their whole body of work. So if drawing attention to the plight of the First Amendment in West Virginia was the goal, then mission accomplished, because this brief is making laps around the Internet and made Jamie Lynn Crofts America’s “It” Lawyer.

Next time, Bob, maybe don’t pick fights you can’t win.

(Full brief on the next page…)

Earlier: How Hulk Hogan Ruined America

HeadshotJoe Patrice is an editor at Above the Law and co-host of Thinking Like A Lawyer. Feel free to email any tips, questions, or comments. Follow him on Twitter if you’re interested in law, politics, and a healthy dose of college sports news.

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