Police

So a guy allegedly gets dragged away in cuffs and he's not even the craziest person to invade campus.

* Wait, are we really going to have to debate the legal merits of this platinum coin thing? Really? Can’t Congress just not hold the country hostage so we don’t have to start messing around with crazy coins and the Fourteenth Amendment? Like, you don’t have to start doing bats**t crazy Carrie Mathison things if you don’t let terrorists take Nicholas Brody in the first place. [The Volokh Conspiracy] * There was another school shooting today. It just makes you wonder if the terrible reign ushered in by Grand Theft Auto will ever end. At least, in this case, the teacher was armed to the teeth WITH WORDS to TALK DOWN the shooter. [Huffington Post] * “Illegal” trades don’t mean the same thing to bankers as they do to everybody else. Well, that’s not true. Maybe the disconnect is more with the word “consequences.” [Dealbreaker] * Yeah, I’m going to go on and say that I’m not going to believe anything coming out of the Trayvon Martin police report. Just like I wasn’t considering anything coming out of racist ass Mark Fuhrman. [Tampa Bay Times] * There’s a lot to lose if Section 5 of the Voting Rights Act gets struck down. [Slate] * I suppose it’s good that lawyers don’t have “I’m going to do a half-assed job here” fees. [Underdog]

Please stop tackling and handcuffing the Fourth Amendment....

Inmates sue alcohol companies, as if they were ever sober enough to read a warning label...

* According to the Second Circuit, the long arm of the law doesn’t extend to the middle finger. You can’t just go around arresting dudes for flipping you the bird. [U.S. Second Circuit / FindLaw] * President Obama jetted off to Hawaii before he could sign the fiscal cliff bill, so he ordered it be signed by autopen. Of course, people are losing their minds over it. [Volokh Conspiracy] * Should we scrap the Constitution? Georgetown Law professor Louis Seidman continues to advocate for constitutional disobedience in this epic ConLaw throwdown. [HuffPost Live] * Don’t celebrate your increase in California bar passage points yet. The state bar changed its tune, and a 40% pass rate is the new standard. That shouldn’t be hard, eh TJSL? [California Bar Journal] * One of our former columnists, Jay Shepherd, has a great way to calculate what your actual hourly rate should be, if you don’t mind working for just pennies a day. Most lawyers would mind. [jayshep] * For the love of God, even Gawker knows that going to law school these days is a fool’s errand, or in their own words: “IT’S A SUCKER’S BET. A CLEAR SUCKER’S BET.” Come on, stop being suckers. :( [Gawker] * If you’d like to hear Dean Lawrence Mitchell of NYT op-ed fame sound off on why there isn’t a lawyer oversupply problem, and why it isn’t his job to get law students jobs, we’ve got a video for you to watch….

The Grinch didn't just steal Christmas this year. Check out the winner of our latest caption contest!

* U.S. Attorneys are rising up, taking office, and conducting their business like hard-ass prosecutors. [Wall Street Journal] * If only they had more guns at the police station, this might never have happened. [Fox News] * Of course, out in Arizona, the state attorney general is pushing for an “armed posse” to patrol schools. Arizona: where bad ideas go to be fruitful and multiply. [NBC News] * Would you give your kidney to your favorite law professor? I wouldn’t, but I would consider taking the kidney of my least favorite law professor and giving it to, well, pretty much anybody else. [Wake Forest School of Law] * “Aereokiller” has been ordered to stop killing TV networks. [Film On] * Wait, we still have “longshoremen”? For real, not just as the backdrop for a season of the Wire? [Miami Herald] * Should law deans be “disbarred”? I like how people have to spend all this time just trying to figure out how to get law deans to tell the truth. [Tax Prof Blog]

The Grinch didn't just steal Christmas this year. Vote for our latest caption contest finalists!

The Grinch didn't just steal Christmas this year. Check out our latest caption contest!

* “Why drag us into it?” Constitutional or not, it seems that not even the D.C. Circuit wants to deal with the political hot mess that’s been caused by President Barack Obama’s recess appointments. [National Law Journal]

* There’s something (allegedly) rotten in the state of Texas: Bickel & Brewer was booted from a multi-million dollar lawsuit due to accusations that the firm paid top dollar for insider information. [Dallas Morning News (sub. req.)]

* There are many more women in the legal profession these days than there were 40 years ago, but — surprise, surprise, here’s a shocker — they’re still getting paid less than their male counterparts. [WSJ Law Blog (sub. req.)]

* And here’s today’s opportunity to beat the horse that just won’t die. This law professor says he pities those who buy into the media’s law school scam narrative, while in reality, most would pity the many unemployed graduates of his law school. [Huffington Post]

* Here’s a protip for the February bar: don’t fake a disability to get extra time. Even if you end up passing, the bar examiners will find out and pretty much ruin your life. Just ask this UC Hastings Law grad. [Am Law Daily]

* “Also, you probably shouldn’t bring pot with you to the federal courthouse (or any other federal property).” Umm, come on, were the Washington police officers who created this marijuana guidebook high? [CNN]

Apparently the "well-dressed" or "gentleman" alleged groper is a frustrated lawyer...

* Everyone wants to know who Obama will appoint to the high court during his second term as president. Our very own David Lat chimed in with his suggestions on this panel of notable Supreme Court watchers. [BuzzFeed Politics] * “If you are writing a biography and either you or your subject are married to a third person, and you have sex, you have done something wrong.” Well, that’s one way to reduce the amount of scandal in your life. [Instapundit] * Who is the shirtless FBI agent who allegedly sent a sexy picture to Jill Kelley of the Petraeus Pentagon — a picture that got him kicked off the case — and how bodacious is his bod? [Business Insider] * There is no “best way” to ask for a raise, especially in this economy. But if you’re feeling sassy, you can take some of this sound advice. [Corporette] * Apologies to all you Beliebers, but California’s Paparazzi Law was just invalidated as unconstitutional. [Cheat Sheet / Daily Beast] * A time when you really shouldn’t have to yell, “Don’t tase me, bro!”: when you’re trying to use a garden hose to prevent your house from catching fire. [Legal Blog Watch]

* Okay, okay, I’ll upgrade my McAfee virus protection, just please don’t kill me. [Fox News] * Elmo likes to talk dirty? [TMZ] * Progress would involve getting cops to stop beating people up just for fun. [Simple Justice] * James Dolan, already one of the worst owners in professional sports, is now sticking to the letter of the Cablevision contract and requiring customers to call in to tell them when Sandy knocked out their service if they want a refund. [Gawker] * The Electric Chair movie sounds horrifying, but so does the death penalty. [Underdog] * Check out Avvo Ignite, an exciting new client conversion and website solution for attorneys. [Avvo Ignite via Law Technology News] * Check me out on this podcast and hear my passionate and slightly drunken defense of David Petraeus. I do not think that there is an epidemic of generals being blackmailed over their affairs. [Recess Appointments]

* If you’re sick of waiting in line to vote, just become a SCOTUS justice. NBD. [DCist] * Now cops are even being awarded massive privacy invasion settlements — against other cops. [Threat Level / Wired] * If you simply have to steal a car, you should probably jack one that works. [Legal Juice] * As election day winds down, here’s more scary s**t to maybe be worried about. [Salon] * Lat talks to the WSJ about the uneasy rise of virtual law firms. [Wall Street Journal]

* Oakland’s police chief is in trouble for filtering emails with a few key phrases into his junk folder. Big deal! Why would a police chief need to read messages about “police brutality,” “excessive force,” or “Occupy Oakland” anyway? [Legal Satyricon] * Graham Spanier, the ex-President of Penn State, has been criminally charged with perjury, obstruction, child-endangerment, and conspiracy. The Sandusky child abuse butterfly effect continues. [ABA Journal] * The story of lawyers, as explained by the characters in Twilight. [LawProfBlawg] * The captain of the literal failboat says he was wrongfully fired. Come on dude, you crashed a freaking cruise ship. Not crashing is kind of the main part of your job. [Lowering the Bar] * The headline to this story is: “When Choosing A Bank To Rob, Avoid The One Where Everyone Is Packing” Just click already. [Consumerist]

The Supreme Court is going to the dogs. Today the justices spent their time discussing how and when police can use drug-sniffing canines.

The Giants won the World Series yesterday, and San Francisco literally went up in flames. Fun!

* The Fifth Circuit upheld a federal law banning gun sales to people under 21 years old. Oh! The humanity! What will the nation’s teenagers do without booze or their own guns? [WSJ Law Blog] * A New York cop is charged with planning to kidnap, cook, and eat 100 women. Gross. I wonder if this will tarnish the NYPD’s sterling reputation. [Daily Intel / New York Magazine] * Scratching your nuts in public is gross, but it’s not the same as, uh, some other grosser, more illegal activities. It would behoove this woman to learn to recognize the difference. [Legal Juice] * Should wearing “personality” glasses count against a criminal defendant? I dunno, but as a guy who has to wear glasses I find it bizarre that people choose to wear them as fashion accessories. Might as well wear a useless prosthetic arm too; I hear they’re the next hip trend. [Legal Blog Watch] * Another intra-family lawsuit: Geoffrey Richards, who teaches at Northwestern Law School, has been sued by his 95-year-old grandfather over a family financial dispute. The grandfather is also calling Richards a “scoundrel” and the “greatest disappointment” in his life. Ouch. [DealBreaker] * President Obama has endorsed several same-sex marriage ballot proposals. Nice work, Barry. [BuzzFeed] * Insights and advice for people interested in fashion law (from Ron Coleman and others). [Likelihood of Confusion]

* New York police just arrested a man for allegedly planning to blow up the Federal Reserve Bank. Thank you, officers. [CNN] * This judge made a telecom executive cry in court. After the teary-eyed businesswoman stormed out, she re-entered the courtroom a short time later and "verbally assaulted" opposing counsel. That’s what I call a serious case of the Mondays. [New York Post] * Much has been made about the terrible connections prostitution has to human trafficking, but what about the self-professed “hos” who, by all accounts, enjoy having sex for money? [East Bay Express] * If you want to ride a mechanical bull, you should probably be aware that getting thrown off isn’t even a risk, it’s a veritable certainty. [Abnormal Use] * I unabashedly dislike the TSA, but it seems these dummies had it coming. [Denver Post] * Back to hating on the airline industry: Sorry, folks, we’re going to be delayed arriving in Vancouver because of some weather issues… and because we have to detour for a moment and search for a missing yacht.” [Consumerist] * Law blogger Eric Turkewitz’s face is all over a bunch of New York bus stop ads. And no, he’s not advertising himself. This story is actually pretty neat. [New York Personal Injury Attorney]

* Check out the absurd rules governing tonight’s presidential debate. Should make for some awesome boring-as-hell television. And yes, of course the rules document was signed by lawyers. [Gawker]

* Chinese politics is starting to adversely affect American law firms. Next thing you know, attorneys will be hiding out in the woods, drinking deer blood. Oh wait, that kind of already happened. [Asian Lawyer]

* Despite the passage of time, mentioning torture at a Guantanamo hearing is still about as awkward as… some generic Family Guy-style non sequitur. [Thomson Reuters News and Insight]

* This is a newly released video of NYPD kicking the ever-loving sh*t out of a homeless man, who was inexplicably charged with assaulting the officer who, again, beat him up on video. Inside a synagogue. Where the man was sleeping. With permission. Can’t wait to see the lawsuit that comes out of this. [Gothamist]

* SCOTUS has agreed to review the Arizona voter ID law. Oh goodie. [WSJ Law Blog]